# How well would you and your spouse do on an INS interview? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 19, 2010, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042 "2010-05-19T19:43:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/21 "2010-05-20T03:14:39Z")
Got my green card last year, based on marriage to a US citizen. In our interview, we got asked none of those questions about personal habits, preferences, etc., etc. We brought a selection of photos showing our time together, from our early days dating, through the wedding, and our married life. About the only thing that seemed to give the interviewer pause was the fact that we still maintain separate bank accounts. We couldn’t even really explain why that was; after we got married, we’ve just never bothered getting a joint account. If one of us needs access to money that the other person has in their account, we just do online transfers between accounts. Anyway, the interviewer was a really nice guy, and we never felt like he was hostile or suspicious. He clearly believed, from the outset, that we were a genuine couple. It probably helped that we had been married almost 5 years, whereas many couples jump straight into the green card process as soon as they get married. ---
**Author:** ![Driver8](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b5a626/32.png) [@Driver8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Driver8)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/22 "2010-05-20T03:27:26Z")
Like many other posters, I too have actually been through this process with USCIS. We did it a couple of years ago, very soon after getting married. I don’t think I could answer questions like “what color is your wife’s toothbrush” or “what brand shampoo does she use”. Heck, I don’t even know my own brand. Luckily they didn’t ask things like that. We had all our paperwork in order, including tax receipts, home ownership papers, bank account details, etc that showed joint living. About the hardest question was when he asked my wife my mother’s name, which she only got partly right given she doesn’t go by her formal name. Honestly I would think that specific type of error is even more convincing then correctly reciting the formal name, given that it implies a typical interaction over studying to pass the test. In the end, we were much more prepared then we needed to be, and the interviewer seemed friendly and relaxed - I don’t think he ever doubted our relationship. For all our preparation and nervousness beforehand it was actually disappointingly anticlimactic. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/23 "2010-05-20T03:40:30Z")
> [@Queen\_Tonya](#): > > I think I’d do well and he’d be lost. I do most of the shopping, so he’d be hit there; I’m not entirely sure he knows what type of shaving cream, toothpaste or soap he’s using, just whatever I provided for him. When my ex and I split up, I spent some time in the bath soap aisle wondering, “What the hell does that soap I like look like _in_ the package?” I’m still not sure that I got it right. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/24 "2010-05-20T04:28:20Z")
A movie style interview, one of us would get deported. My SO really pays little attention to detail sort of stuff. If I don’t buy my body wash, laundry detergent and the like, we’ll end up with the wrong things. (which is really a pain since I have to have certain ones or my skin goes crazy) A real one as described above, we’d probably be ok. ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/25 "2010-05-20T04:46:18Z")
My wife and I passed it; I don’t recall any specific questions. Our lawyer advised us to walk through our house before the interview and make a note of the layout; if the INS _was_ suspicious, they’d split us up and ask things like “how many windows are there in your house?” But he also said that assuming we did have a legitimate relationship, there wasn’t anything for us to worry about. As it was, our lawyer sat in on the interview, and a good bit of the time was taken by him chatting with the INS guy. The officer seemed to be interested in how we interacted with one another, and when we showed him some photo albums of trips we took, he asked us to tell him the story of the trips. BTW, it was videotaped (with a little desktop webcam). I can understand how that might make some people nervous. ---
**Author:** ![MsChilePepper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@MsChilePepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsChilePepper)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/26 "2010-05-20T05:55:29Z")
My Jamaican ex and I did our INS interview in '96, and we got none of the toothpaste brand-style questions. They had all our info in the paperwork, and we hadn’t made any screw-ups filling out all those forms or providing copies of stuff. IIRC, it was very superficial in the first part of the interview, and then the interviewer asked us in turn to go out in the hall while she asked a few brief questions. She asked me if I really loved him, and if I believed he really loved me. Can’t remember anything else. Then we were both back in the room, and she asked, “Are those your wedding photos?” and I handed her the album we’d brought. She just flipped through a few pages and made noncommittal noises, and that was that, rubber-stamped papers and off we went. However, I hold no illusions that he would’ve been able to name any brand names, since I did most of the shopping. I think for the most part, as long as they didn’t sniff anything suspicious in your paperwork, the questioning was a formality (or at least pre-9/11 it seemed to be). As is the case when you go through customs/immigration either when flying or driving across borders, they’re watching how you behave, not only during your interview, but _while you’re waiting in line_ somebody’s watching to see if you’re behaving oddly. They’re watching for micro-expressions, body language, nervous twitching. People who are guilty of something usually telegraph their discomfort. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 8:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/27 "2010-05-20T08:53:18Z")
I’m single so I imagine I’d either do very well or fail completely, depending on how well I create my imaginary partner 😉 ---
**Author:** ![The\_Real\_Regency\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@The\_Real\_Regency\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Real_Regency_Elf)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/28 "2010-05-20T13:00:49Z")
Went through this in 1991 in Atlanta with my (now ex) English husband and while we were prepared for the movie style specific questions, they were very easy on us too. We also had wedding pics and invites and that seemed to satisfy the interviewer. They didn’t even question us separately. I think the whole thing took ten minutes tops. ---
**Author:** ![Rushgeekgirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rushgeekgirl/32/3715_2.png) [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/29 "2010-05-20T13:17:39Z")
I know we’d do fine on the basics. We’ve lived together six years and have a child. Of course we’re not married yet. Maybe one day. ---
**Author:** ![Balthisar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/balthisar/32/2825_2.png) [@Balthisar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balthisar)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/30 "2010-05-20T16:08:33Z")
Well, I _am_ married to a foreigner, and had to go through the process to get my wife’s permanent residency card. Since then, we’ve met lots of other such couples, and not in one case has it ever been more difficult for them than it was for us. And all of these cases, the wives (always wives, never husbands!) have been from “undesirable” and “fraudulent” Mexico. The hardest (if you can call it that) was the interview after two years to change her residency from conditional to permanent. We had a couple of letters from friends, and basic questions from the initial application interview from years before: how’d we meet? How’s her English coming along? Okay, nice couple, turn in the green card, use this I-94 again until the permanent card shows up, and have a nice day. ---
**Author:** ![badbadrubberpiggy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/57b2e6/32.png) [@badbadrubberpiggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/badbadrubberpiggy)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/31 "2010-05-20T16:15:38Z")
> [@Antinor01](#): > > A movie style interview, one of us would get deported. My SO really pays little attention to detail sort of stuff. If I don’t buy my body wash, laundry detergent and the like, we’ll end up with the wrong things. (which is really a pain since I have to have certain ones or my skin goes crazy) > > A real one as described above, we’d probably be ok. Yeah, the movie style one, we’d be in trouble. I doubt my husband has any idea what kind of shampoo I use, especially considering I change all the time - it’d probably take me a few minutes to remember which one I currently have in the shower, and I’m the one using it. He definitely has no idea what stuff I use on my face - and it’d be sort of odd if he did, considering he doesn’t buy or use any of it. I know what color his tooth brush is, but the only reason I remember what toothpase we use right now is because I looked at it this morning, prompted by this thread. He picks it out since I don’t care what flavor it is and he does, so I just use what’s there. And he does most of the laundry, so I’m not really sure what kind of detergent we have. We’d probably do fine on a real test, though. ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/32 "2010-05-20T17:47:41Z")
We would fail spectacularly. I would know everything down to the tiniest detail and he would be dragged away screaming, “But I swear she’s my wife! I know her name, dammit! I KNOW HER NAME!” He couldn’t even tell you where his keys are let alone what kind of toothpaste I use. 😛 I kid, I kid…a litte. If you asked him what my favorite thing is on the local chinese food place’s menu or what my favorite flower is or something like that he would know. If you asked him about my favorite author or about the mole on my thigh he would know. Toothpaste or groceries though? He would be deported so fast his head would spin. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/33 "2010-05-20T18:34:59Z")
Think of it as a high-stakes version of the Newlywed Game: “So, where’s the most unusual place you’ve made whoopee?” ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/34 "2010-05-20T18:45:26Z")
> [@janeslogin](#): > > I’ve been married for 25 years and I know none of answers to questions in the OP. She works for the state doing something she don’t talk about. She is gone somewhere three days a week. I’ve no idea where her work address officially is. I’ve no idea of her phone number(s). If we need to communicate we use email. I expect to see her Thursday evening. Based on the documentary movie _True Lies_, I can infer from this that your wife is most likely a mid-level sales rep who frequently has to travel to client locations, and is covering up her rather boring job with something exciting. Happens all the time. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Nene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/da6949/32.png) [@El\_Nene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Nene)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/35 "2010-05-20T18:58:25Z")
I also can’t remember the questions we were asked but I do remember being disappointed we weren’t grilled more thoroughly. I suspect they didn’t have reason to believe the marriage wasn’t legitimate. We’d already been married 5+ years and had a child when I finally got around to applying for her resident card. ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/36 "2010-05-20T18:59:09Z")
I would fail the movie version if they were asking questions about me. Sheesh. A really good friend needed an emergency passport due to a scedule change and they called me as one of her references. Now in my defense I answered the call halfway to a funeral and while navigating through Montreal but I still managed to get her hair and eye colour wrong ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/37 "2010-05-20T19:01:33Z")
More on-topic, the only duo I know of who got this kind of grilling had a very superficial interview as well. I think the level of scrutiny greatly depends on the individual agent, plus maybe any of a number of “warning factors” that they’re told to look out for. (Like if one of them pretty much doesn’t speak English, yet the other one doesn’t speak that other person’s native language). ---
**Author:** ![El\_Nene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/da6949/32.png) [@El\_Nene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Nene)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/38 "2010-05-20T19:08:21Z")
> [@robardin](#): > > More on-topic, the only duo I know of who got this kind of grilling had a very superficial interview as well. I think the level of scrutiny greatly depends on the individual agent, plus maybe any of a number of “warning factors” that they’re told to look out for. (Like if one of them pretty much doesn’t speak English, yet the other one doesn’t speak that other person’s native language). I doubt this too. I knew a dude, tall good looking Indian guy, who married a fugly white girl for his visa and got it without a problem. I should mention that she didn’t know he only wanted his visa. ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/39 "2010-05-20T19:54:32Z")
My husband and I had an INS interview in 2004 after we were married. We brought in three years of tax returns, banking records, utility bills, wedding photos and invitations and tons of other photos. The person conducting the interview chatted with us for a few minutes, asked a few general questions about how long we’d known each other, where we’d met, then photo copied everything, handed it back and sent us on our way. We were all prepared for the super-intensitve, detailed interview as well, but were kind of underwhelmed with the questions asked, particularly given the amount of paperwork we were required to organize. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2010, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042/40 "2010-05-20T20:53:35Z")
> [@overlyverbose](#): > > My husband and I had an INS interview in 2004 after we were married. We brought in three years of tax returns, banking records, utility bills, wedding photos and invitations and tons of other photos. The person conducting the interview chatted with us for a few minutes, asked a few general questions about how long we’d known each other, where we’d met, then photo copied everything, handed it back and sent us on our way. > > We were all prepared for the super-intensitve, detailed interview as well, but were kind of underwhelmed with the questions asked, particularly given the amount of paperwork we were required to organize. This was our experience as well. That the interviewer was friendly was a welcome surprise; some of the agents we’d dealt with (through what I assume was bulletproof glass) bordered on surliness. I did the majority of the talking for both of us, and it never felt like an interrogation. Maybe they intensify the questioning if they feel like something’s amiss. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-well-would-you-and-your-spouse-do-on-an-ins-interview/540042.md?page=3)