# How would go go after a vampire? (imaginary) **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 24, 2004, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138 "2004-03-24T15:26:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2004, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/21 "2004-03-24T23:21:51Z")
A rifle! Ha ha ha! _vampire walks out of his house_ _BANG_ Medea’sChild: PWNED! Vampire: OMG!!! AWP WHORE!!! Just a little CounterStrike joke. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2004, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/22 "2004-03-24T23:54:07Z")
I didn’t see the _Blade II_\* tactics mentioned, surely your character would have seen the movie & gotten an idea or two? Sunlamps Anything made from silver–including bullets (which disintegrated regular vampires with a marvelous effect). ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/23 "2004-03-25T00:44:33Z")
As it’s WoD I’d say definately explosives flame etc… get the crossbow prepared as well and make sure to aim for the heart! Holy water won’t do crap (unless you’re storyteller has bent some of those rules, so ignore me) crosses nothing unless you have true faith in that faith (Vampires couldn’t get within miles of Joan of Arc I seem to recall) Yes for those curious that means you can repel vampires with your true faith of allah, satan, cthulu whatever… as long as it’s true faith lol. Uhm… I really don’t know what other advice to give as I usually play the vampires, and I usually end up dead. So uhm yeah… lol ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/24 "2004-03-25T01:20:29Z")
Please, no one hit me, since you all are answering seriously, but… > [@Medea's Child](#): > > How would go go after a vampire? With one’s ‘Go Go’ boots? 😃 ::: stomp stomp stomp ::: Ok, I’ll be going now and cleaning the tables after everyone before I shut the lights off. Sorry. ---
**Author:** ![Jenaroph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e8c25b/32.png) [@Jenaroph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jenaroph)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/25 "2004-03-25T01:47:17Z")
Guys, guys, you clearly didn’t read the title correctly: > [@](#): > > How would go go after a vampire? (imaginary) The answer is clear: First Jane Weidlin would get up and go capture the light, shining it in his face, which will have him kissing the asphalt because as every vampire knows, you can’t walk in your sleep. Kathy Valentine would act as a mercenary and knock him head over heels, leaving skidmarks on his heart with the holy water. He’ll wonder how much more he can take as Belinda Carlisle seals his lips with the homemade napalm, rendering him unable to bite. It’s everything but party time as Charlotte Caffey is the only one who’ll hang garlic around his neck. He’ll be fading fast as Gina Schock gives him the beat by driving the wooden stake through his heart. With a plan like this, he’s good for gone. Is this post over the top? I think it’s me. Time for a vacation. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/26 "2004-03-25T02:28:49Z")
Please note- I will avoid using the full spellings of certain terms in order to foil certain searches. Note also that a search on Ne_r De_th _xp_ri_nc_s will show many threads where I claim to be an Eth\*\* Psych_st. My persona in those threads is an SoE with a 5 in the Mind Sphere. Note as well, my prior claims that I can use a special Eth\*\* modem to project my mind into the Dgtal Web (see the WW book of that name.) where the SDMB, appears as a grid room and I can scan logged on users for various things such as Awk_n_d Av__rs. I would thus be aware that you are a Mg_, as well as what Tr_d_t **n you belong to. I have also established that my scans an detect the presence and relative strength of the Tr** F\*\*th merit. Now In character- From some work with an Eth\*\* Biologist (our researches intersect at the study of the human brain) I know something of the Undead. They do indeed have some mental abilities. They are not affected by silver. Sunlight will kill them (a full spectrum light may work as well, I don’t know). The V_rb_n\* are known as blood m_g_s. Have you no skill with this? The vampire must drink blood- a skilled V_rb_n\* might boil, or coagulate the blood in a vampire’s body. A Ch_r_st\*r could assault the vampire with pure faith. Physical assault may be unnecessary. How old is your sister? What legal rights do you have over her? Vampires are, for obvious reasons, unwilling to attend daylight hearings. Has this vampire committed any crimes you know of? You could simply plant child pornography in the vampire’s house and report it anonymously to the police. A member of the _k_sh\*c Br\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*d (his control over the systems of his body was astounding) once told me “Mastery is not the ability to generate the most force. It is the ability to defeat an opponent with the least force necessary.” ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/27 "2004-03-25T02:59:25Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > Vampires are, for obvious reasons, unwilling to attend daylight hearings. You never heard of s\*nglasses? ---
**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/28 "2004-03-25T03:34:16Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > “Mastery is not the ability to generate the most force. It is the ability to defeat an opponent with the least force necessary.” A noted alien-smiting badass once told me, “I say we take off and nuke 'em from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.” ---
**Author:** ![Medea\_s\_Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Medea\_s\_Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Medea_s_Child)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/29 "2004-03-25T14:36:48Z")
Thanks guys! I knew you would be helpful! **DocCathode** some of your suggestions are great…some are beyond my skill level. Yes, I’m a Ve_ben_, but I’m an apprentice…one dot. Arete 1 is a pisser at some points. And, in game, I cannot act on what my char cannot know. Even out of character, _I_ don’t know if I have True Faith. The way the game is set up, supernatural merits and flaws are not player controlled or player knowledge until you find them. I’ll find out soon, though. (I highly doubt it, honestly.) **GMRuyujin** ’s ideas involving much non-magical fire are probably going to be the way to go. The vampire has not captured my sister in a physical way, that I know of. She’s still going to her boarding school…she is, however, under his mental thrall, which is bad enough from my view. The possibility of her getting turned, ghouled, or outright killed simply to get back at my character is pretty high, and unacceptable. ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/30 "2004-03-25T18:12:02Z")
Strangely enough, I had a dream last night with a vampire or two in it(not something normal for me). Apparently the only thing that could hurt them was the Blood of a werewolf, which burns them like acid(and apparently, putting such blood on a knife and stabbing them with it will kill them quickly). I have no idea why that would be, and as you can see, it has a drawback of it’s own. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 8:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/31 "2004-03-26T08:03:51Z")
Hmmm…Do you know where this Vampire lives? Where he sleeps? Would it be possible to simply destroy the place while he’s sleeping, like by blowing it up, or setting it on fire? As for weaponry…[simple hand grenades might be a good bet.](http://www.fas.org/man/dod-101/sys/land/grenade.htm) For example, [The M84 “Stun” grenade](http://www.fas.org/man/dod-101/sys/land/xm84.htm), Aka, a “flash-bang” grenade. Used by many police SWAT teams, and in any number of FPS games. Even if the bright light emmited by one of these babies isn’t enough to actually _burn_ a vampire, like sunlight would, it should still be more than enough to dazzle his heightened senses. Incindiary grenades, such as the [M14 Thermite grenade](http://www.fas.org/man/dod-101/sys/land/m14-th3.htm), the [M15 White Phosphorus grenade](http://www.fas.org/man/dod-101/sys/land/m15.htm) or even one of the first, Soviet government-issue (!) [molotov cocktails](http://www.battlefield.ru/library/bookshelf/weapons/weapons2.html) should be helpful. These weapons, of course, would be hard to come by legally. You might try the black market, or an underpayed armorer or quartermaster at your nearest army base. (JUST in an RPG, of course. Don’t try this IRL.) [Chemical](http://www.fas.org/nuke/intro/cw/chem-table.htm) weapons might be worth a go…[Arsine Gas](http://www.emedicine.com/emerg/byname/cbrne---arsenicals-arsine.htm), an arsenic derivative, might be especially effective against a vampire—it works by destroying red blood cells. Chemical weapons, of course, are also hard to come by. If you can’t make them yourself, you might, again, be able to find it on the black market, or by raiding a chemical weapons storage facility. Too bad that it seems your Vampire won’t be effected by silver…powdered silver, loaded into a shotgun, has been known to be an especially effective (if gruesome) way of dealing with creatures with an anathema to silver. Speaking of which, if I may ask…what’s the combat experience of you and your allies? If it’s true that the vampire has some sort of psychic abilities, then perhaps getting [psychiatric medications](http://www.healthyplace.com/medications/index.asp) into his system might affect said powers? Maybe you could trick him into “feeding” on a person (or persons) who’re taking heavy doses of psychiatric meds. You wouldn’t even have to get close to him to deliver the medication…he’d be drinking his own “poison,” of his own volition. (Of course, by doing this, you’d send some hapless and innocent sucker to their death…or worse. But hey, omelets and eggs.) [Here’s a few more pointers on how do deal with a telepathic foe.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?postid=4343399) The [Federal Vampire and Zombie Agency](http://www.fvza.org/science2.html) claims to have some information on Vampiric neurotransmitter levels, among other info on Vampire physiology, FYI. And a few [“Penny Dreadfuls”](http://vampirerpg.free.fr/Rules/Penny_Dreadfuls.html) used by other Vampire/Werewolf hunters. And, of course, please be sure that the target is _actually a Vampire_ before you go after him. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Elvis_Rojo)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/32 "2004-03-26T14:20:07Z")
Okay, unless you’re really proficient with a crossbow or have great mele abilities, forget the whole “Stake him” mindset…in WoD, it takes a LOT to hit the heart properly, and then you’ve got to have enough force behind it to actually pierce it properly, and you really don’t want to leave yourself left to chance like that. So get those things out of your head (unless you’ve got a really strong guy on your side with insane aim). The best bet, as people have said, is fire. You want to find anything that can inflict aggrivated wounds on this guy. Mostly, that’s sunlight and fire as far as you’re concerned. If you can get thermite or phosphorous grenades, go with it. You can try a flare gun as well, if you’d like. Also, carry road flares. Being a mage, and having a community that tends to look after you, I think it should be safe to say you could find someone who’s skilled enough to bless things, right? If so, get a blade blessed, and I’m not talking religiously here. Get it embued with mystical energy and you’ve got yourself something that will carve him up like hot butter (unless he’s got fortitude, but even then, you’re hurting this guy pretty bad). Also, do you happen to know what clan he’s from? If so, that may allow you to take advantage of certain “strengths” he has. For example, certain vamps have the ability to highten their senses. Lure him into a dark area where he’d be forced to up his vision and hearing (you’d be able to notice this by the glowing of his eyes). Then hit him with bright light, loud noise (a boombox cranked up with some Guitar Wolf works wonders), and while he’s stunned, hit him with some of that homemade napalm. And wear heavy, fire retardant clothes, because they tend not to die very peacefully. Good luck! ---
**Author:** ![Medea\_s\_Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Medea\_s\_Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Medea_s_Child)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/33 "2004-03-26T15:14:08Z")
We are not a combat group. The basis of the game is very normal people, getting Awakened at Arete 1. Only one of us has had a Seeking to get Arete 2. If I can’t ‘charge’ a weapon, my mentor can, and she’s in this with us. In character, I don’t know that vampires have clans, much less that that gives them different abilities. I know that he’s rich, Italian looking, carries an automatic weapon, and that under no circumstances should I look into his eyes. (Well, I might, because I’ve been working on a Mind shield…) Arsine gas looks fun, but I don’t know if I want to use something that can flow back at me and my friends like that. I don’t know what he’s using for a hide out right now, but I’m going to try to find out. Game starts at 10am tomorrow. Thank you guys for all of your ideas. I’m so geeked about this its…well…slightly disturbing. I need to get a life. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/34 "2004-03-26T15:26:32Z")
> [@Medea's Child](#): > > And, in game, I cannot act on what my char cannot know. Even out of character, _I_ don’t know if I have True Faith. The way the game is set up, supernatural merits and flaws are not player controlled or player knowledge until you find them. I’ll find out soon, though. Out Of Character I suppose I should clarify why I’m using asterisks. In certain threads on the supernatural, I maintain that I am a world class researcher and that my SoE work is real. I don’t want the people who believe that (a few are convinced) to find this thread. (But ask yourself, am I lying in those threads? Or is my denial here the lie?). So I avoid using Et\*\*r, or certain other words that I use in those threads to prevent somebody who knows me only through hose threads from finding this one. I’d link to a few, but I haven’t borrowed a friend’s credit card to pay my $4.95 yet. I am not a munchkin (for those who aren’t rpgers, a munchkin is a person who doesn’t care about acting, characters having personality or consistency, or anything besides having the most powerful character). However, my posts in previous threads have established my status as an SoE and that I would know whether you had True Faith, even if you don’t know. I specifically mention readings obtained from **Polycarp, Zev Steinhardt** and a few others. I didn’t make up the ability to detect TF, just now as a munchkin tactic to give you more power. I first stated that I could do so in a post several years old. I cannot raise your ratings, but I can detect them. Please note, that although I have established a MtA board persona, I’m not using this opportunity to claim a 5 in Kindred lore, or any other ridiculous stat. I have a 5 in my primary sphere. But, my posts over several years have made it clear that the mind, specifically Et\*\*r Ps_ch_l_g_, is the area of my research. Show your ST this thread and several of the threads in which I post as an SoE (the most recent was a thread on whether sp_r_ts had been c_pt_r_d on f_lm. Others are- L_f_ c_nt_n **s _ft_r ph_s_c\*l d** th is this pr\*\*f of G_d’s ex_st_nc_, the great Phi debate). If you had TF, I’d know. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/35 "2004-03-26T22:58:56Z")
> [@Medea's Child](#): > > In character, I don’t know that vampires have clans, much less that that gives them different abilities. I know that he’s rich, Italian looking, carries an automatic weapon, and that under no circumstances should I look into his eyes. (Well, I might, because I’ve been working on a Mind shield…) You said he’s rich…does he have bodyguards, or an enterage? If so, even if they aren’t vampires themselves, they might still present a problem. Perhaps you could use a pickpocket to steal his wallet in public, causing him to persue the thief, and lure him into an ambush that way? Oh, and if he’s _not_ affected by Garlic, you might want to try not eating any…the smell of it might just tip him off that you’re on to him. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/36 "2004-03-26T23:31:06Z")
BTW- Don’t forget planning and coordination. All the firepower in the world won’t do you any good if you don’t plan for every contingency and learn to function as a group. “We’ll go in and burn 'im.” is not a sufficient plan. You need to cover every contingency. What do you do about the bodyguards? What if the bodyguards are armed with uzis? What if the police do show up? What if the vamp has hostages? A skilled fighter can take down a much larger group, if they don’t coordinate. Back in my Darkon days, I saw it happen often. Bodyguards will almost certainly work in unison executing a previously devised strategy. Or you could just see if there’s a big enough gas line under the house and plant a bomb. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/37 "2004-03-27T03:03:52Z")
> [@Ranchoth](#): > > You said he’s rich…does he have bodyguards, or an enterage? Aaargh…that would be “entourage,” of course. me no spell guud no mor. And a ditto on **Doc Cathode’s** notes on planning, and working as a group. So, read your Sun Tzu, as you practice with your [USAS-12](http://world.guns.ru/shotgun/sh16-e.htm). 😃 BTW, here’s some [“Contempory Weapons Tables,”](http://www.gurpsmaster.de/weaptab.htm) complete with stats on military grenades, firebombs, flashbangs, etc. It’s for GURPS, but you might be able to adapt the information for your system. (“Might” being the operative word, of course.) Ranchoth ([Scatterguns](http://www.gurpsmaster.de/shotguns.htm)…gotta love 'em.) ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/38 "2004-03-27T03:43:03Z")
Am I the first to mention a Cecil article? [I am! I am!](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a1_039.html) ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/39 "2004-03-27T06:31:30Z")
Well, in my experience, and I’ve killed a few vampires in my day, the first thing you need to do is…Oh, wait, you said “imaginary”, not “in real life”. Sorry, got no experience at that. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Elvis_Rojo)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138/40 "2004-03-29T13:10:24Z")
So **Medea’s Child** , how did the hunt go? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-go-go-after-a-vampire-imaginary/236138.md?page=3)