# How would you alter your body if you could? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 15, 2010, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024 "2010-02-15T02:07:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/1 "2010-02-15T02:07:50Z")
If you could have any physical appearance you chose, what changes if any would you make? I’m mostly satified with who I am but I would like to fine tune a few things:[ol][_]I’ve been fat my whole life, and nothing I’ve ever done has changed that. I’d really like to be trim.[_]I would like _somewhat_ larger genitals. Nothing spectacular, but maybe 25% bigger.[_]I would like my hair to be either straighter or curlier. Right now it’s default state is a wavy/frizzy inbetween.[_]Oh, and straighter, whiter teeth without thousands of dollars of dental billsETA: how could I have forgotten about being nearsighted? Ditch the glasses.[/ol] ---
**Author:** ![The\_Bith\_Shuffle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ce73a5/32.png) [@The\_Bith\_Shuffle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Bith_Shuffle)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/2 "2010-02-15T02:12:34Z")
> [@Lumpy](#): > > I would like _somewhat_ larger genitals. Nothing spectacular, but maybe 25% bigger. Um, you do realize that this is a significant increase, right? If your dong is five and a half inches long while erect, it will be 6.87 inches after a 25% increase. That’s big. ---
**Author:** ![Taomist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@Taomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taomist)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/3 "2010-02-15T02:24:26Z")
Let’s see…born with bad eyes, bad skin, bad hair, hrm… Ok, if I had to fix just one thing, it’d be the skin, as that’s something that really, nothing can be done about. Glasses I can live with or wear contacts Hair I can color, so meh The extra 40 pounds I earned myself, and can take off myself Just…good skin would be nice.😛 ---
**Author:** ![dragoncat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6a8cbe/32.png) [@dragoncat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dragoncat)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/4 "2010-02-15T02:27:35Z")
I’d forgo the bipolar disorder, thank you very much. It presents a major obstacle to many of life’s pleasures and pursuits. I’d like a braid like the Na’vi, too. Is that allowed? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![River\_Hippie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/river_hippie/32/26_2.png) [@River\_Hippie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/River_Hippie)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/5 "2010-02-15T02:28:00Z")
Better teeth. Don’t care enough to spend lots of money though. ---
**Author:** ![Sefton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Sefton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sefton)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/6 "2010-02-15T02:35:12Z")
My acne cleared when I was 16, and then my hair promptly started falling out. If I could get my hair back, I’d be immensely happy. ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/7 "2010-02-15T02:38:39Z")
I’d like to be 5 inches taller; that way my weight would be just about right. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/8 "2010-02-15T02:44:45Z")
If I get to mold things the way I want, I’d swap some mass for some height. Maybe 5-6 inches or so. I can handle the glasses ok, and I’m more than adequate in other areas, so I’d finish with a full set of flawless pearlies. ---
**Author:** ![freckafree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freckafree/32/3050_2.png) [@freckafree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freckafree)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/9 "2010-02-15T03:11:56Z")
I used to run. I haven’t for years. But I have dreams about running, and I love those dreams. I want a body that will allow me to run. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/10 "2010-02-15T03:13:30Z")
> [@The\_Bith\_Shuffle](#): > > Um, you do realize that this is a significant increase, right? If your dong is five and a half inches long while erect, it will be 6.87 inches after a 25% increase. That’s big. I’d call it generous but not huge, unless I’m sadly mistaken about what the bell curve percentile is. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/11 "2010-02-15T03:13:32Z")
[ul]Perfect health 3-4 inches taller Weight down to 200 or so [/ul] ---
**Author:** ![fubbleskag](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@fubbleskag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fubbleskag)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/12 "2010-02-15T03:17:19Z")
I’d like to be able to start/stop growing facial hair at will. ---
**Author:** ![MLS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/919ad9/32.png) [@MLS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MLS)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/13 "2010-02-15T03:52:42Z")
Really important ones only: I want a new spine that does not have arthritis in it. I want intestines that do not have lymphocytic colitis. I want at least 50 pounds of fat to be gone permanently. I want 20/20 vision. I’ve never had that and I bet it would be nice. Actually, the final one isn’t that big a deal, as I’ve dealt with glasses since forever. The first three could be combined into one: I want back the body I had when I was 35. ---
**Author:** ![Ichini\_Sanshigo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/d9b06d/32.png) [@Ichini\_Sanshigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ichini_Sanshigo)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/14 "2010-02-15T03:53:32Z")
Better skin and a larger chin. And 20/20 vision would be nice, just so’s I could save money on contact lenses. ---
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/15 "2010-02-15T04:36:10Z")
Better teeth, mine are OK, my biggest problem is I had a lot of caps put on in the late 90s, of course over the years your natural teeth age and the caps don’t. So now I have to replace the capped teeth at $700/tooth and I’m not crazy about it since the caps are perfectly fine. I tried to whiten the natural teeth but it still doesn’t match well. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/16 "2010-02-15T04:43:41Z")
Wish I could ditch the glasses. And maybe be a bit taller. In general, though, I’m quite happy–I like my body a lot and think it’s quite svelte, etc. ---
**Author:** ![Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f475e1/32.png) [@Jimmy\_Chitwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jimmy_Chitwood)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/17 "2010-02-15T04:46:12Z")
I’d like to replace all the parts in my body with the analogous parts of a dragon. Then I would be fixed. ---
**Author:** ![Mrs.Cake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2acd7d/32.png) [@Mrs.Cake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mrs.Cake)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/18 "2010-02-15T05:00:26Z")
I’d settle for just tweaking the biological clock back to have the body I had at 25 or 26. I would show it all the love and appreciation I didn’t at the time. ---
**Author:** ![BaneSidhe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c5a1d2/32.png) [@BaneSidhe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BaneSidhe)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/19 "2010-02-15T05:03:14Z")
Taller. I’d be taller. ---
**Author:** ![Todderbob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e47774/32.png) [@Todderbob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Todderbob)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2010, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024/20 "2010-02-15T05:06:52Z")
> [@Lumpy](#): > > I’d call it generous but not huge, unless I’m sadly mistaken about what the bell curve percentile is. What’s the belle curve for penis size, then? In order of importance to me: Flawless vision. Perfect teeth. Hair that didn’t do _this_ shit… it borders between “hurrrrr, I just got out of bed!” and “HEY LOOK I’M AN ASTRONAUT!” and I can’t change that, no matter what I do, so I stopped trying. I’d exchange fat mass for muscle mass, I’m working on that now, actually, so no biggie. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-alter-your-body-if-you-could/529024.md?page=2)