# How would you describe an orgasm (not seeking sex stories!)? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 18, 2026, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186 "2026-09-18T18:24:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![DPRK](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4491bb/32.png) [@DPRK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DPRK)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2026, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/21 "2026-09-19T04:14:44Z")
> [@EinsteinsHund](#): > > And they differ, much. I’ve had orgasms when I thought “this is a cosmic event!”, and some when I thought “meh, slightly better than a sneeze.”. > [@Velocity](#): > > Because I’ve heard some people describe their orgasms as so intense that they almost fainted, or twitched/shook for nearly a full minute. I rather envy that and am pretty sure my body won’t do something like that. There is clearly something to practice, as it were. There is also room for a lot of clinical and/or esoteric language to describe exactly what happens and where and how it subjectively feels and how you should be yogically connected to the experience, which seems like what the OP was asking about. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2026, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/22 "2026-09-19T23:13:18Z")
> [@Roderick\_Femm](#): > > So I agree with whoever said the buildup is better than the climax, anyway it was for me. That was me, and since you asked, I am a woman. As far as “yogic connection,” I’m not exactly sure what that means, but I’m not very emotional about sex. ---
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [September 19, 2026, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/23 "2026-09-19T23:56:34Z")
> [@Spice\_Weasel](#): > > As far as “yogic connection,” I’m not exactly sure what that means, but I’m not very emotional about sex. That doesn’t matter, because there’s no such thing as “yogic connection” or yogic anything. I don’t know about the science of the human orgasm, but I think a lot of it can be explained by a massive release of dopamine and adenaline. ---
**Author:** ![DPRK](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4491bb/32.png) [@DPRK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DPRK)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2026, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/24 "2026-09-20T06:21:25Z")
The connection would be things you can consciously affect to some extent: it could be your mental state about the whole thing (would you rather be somewhere else and get it over with as quickly as possible, or are you into it to the extent of losing yourself? Are you having fun?), all the way to clenching certain muscles. I do not think you can make your body directly squirt adrenaline, but you can focus on subjective sensations. ---
**Author:** ![sboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac8455/32.png) [@sboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sboy)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2026, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/25 "2026-09-20T15:41:25Z")
I can recall trying to understand why people would take drugs or devote their life to gambling (looking at you Mom) or running marathons . I wondered if the “high” those things gave them was akin to my “high” from an orgasm? Once I understood what it was (the feeling of the orgasm) I knew that I would always want to feel that way again. I have met several people ( all female) who have not experienced it, and it made me so sad. I was with an older woman (\>70) who had her first one with me and she cried PROFUNDLY for quite while afterward. I was worried that I had injured her. When she finally recovered she said. “I always wondered what the big deal was with sex. Now I know”. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2026, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/26 "2026-09-20T15:51:51Z")
> [@Spice\_Weasel](#): > > …but I’m not very emotional about sex. Right. Nobody likes an overactor. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2026, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/27 "2026-09-20T17:04:45Z")
> [@Moriarty](#): > > But how would you describe an orgasm to somebody who never had one? I’m curious how the description would go. It’s exactly like sniffing amyl nitrite. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2026, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/28 "2026-09-20T18:39:15Z")
> [@Roderick\_Femm](#): > > I am a man, so I will speak to that. It will be mostly from memory, “how it feels” has changed a great deal since my prostate biopsy. So I agree with whoever said the buildup is better than the climax, anyway it was for me. How the buildup feels is kind of like scratching an itch, it feels good and you don’t want to stop, and instead of the scratching reducing the itch it intensifies it. At some point the itch takes over and further scratching is redundant (and possibly a little unpleasant). The orgasm itself, to me, feels just how it looks, first a relief and release, and then a literal come-down. Speaking as a woman, that sounds like a pretty good description to me. > [@EinsteinsHund](#): > > And they differ, much. I’ve had orgasms when I thought “this is a cosmic event!”, and some when I thought “meh, slightly better than a sneeze.”. Yeah, there’s a pretty large range. I don’t think I’ve ever experienced the cosmic event. But I’ve had profoundly satisfying orgasms, and “hmm, is that all i can do?” orgasms. Sadly, the later grow more common with age. ---
**Author:** ![fachverwirrt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/94ad74/32.png) [@fachverwirrt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fachverwirrt)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2026, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/29 "2026-09-20T18:39:46Z")
I don’t think language is really up to the task of describing any sensation that somebody hasn’t experienced. How would you describe pain? How would you describe green? The thing about subjective experience is that the subject has to experience it. ---
**Author:** ![Patx2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/73ab20/32.png) [@Patx2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patx2)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2026, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/30 "2026-09-20T22:32:07Z")
That’s what I was going to say. It’s an intense buildup of pressure and then such a release. I think both parts are fabulous, the build up and the orgasm. ---
**Author:** ![Jaycat.again](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jaycat.again/32/11525_2.png) [@Jaycat.again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaycat.again)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2026, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/31 "2026-09-21T00:19:37Z")
It would take more time to figure out how to describe it than it would to just go ahead and have one. Or two. ---
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2026, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/32 "2026-09-21T01:20:53Z")
Not everyone can have it so easily. ---
**Author:** ![Allecher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a6a055/32.png) [@Allecher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Allecher)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2026, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/33 "2026-09-21T12:25:27Z")
My analogy is when you awaken from a really sound sleep and then get to do a full-body stretch. It’s not quite an orgasm, but your whole sympathetic nervous system gets to fire at the same time. ---
**Author:** ![Moris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moris/32/2846_2.png) [@Moris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moris)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2026, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/34 "2026-09-22T00:13:28Z")
Languages are just not good enough for describing qualia. The universe is dead silent. Our ears detect vibrations and that dimension of madness in our brain is “sound”. There is no “sound”. Deaf person feels a vibration of a diesel engine, but further than that analogy falls short. And how would we ever be able to comprehend what birds actually FEEL with their sense of magnetism? Speaking of orgasms, many years ago I was on medication for some neurological issues. Orgasms at the time were different…I realised there are two different “flavors”. They were identical in amplitude and frequency, but one “flavor” was a bit delayed and “out of phase” with another. Weird. All my life I though the thing was let’s say “orange”, it turned out there’s a “red” and a “yellow” layer which I never realized before because they were perfectly overlapping. Perhaps those ingridients were different types of orgasms women can experience? I don’t know. ---
**Author:** ![ricepad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b38774/32.png) [@ricepad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ricepad)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2026, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/35 "2026-09-22T00:28:42Z")
> [@Moris](#): > > Orgasms at the time were different…I realised there are two different “flavors”. Ok, so if we’re going to talk about how orgasms _taste_, we’re opening a whole new kind of discussion…! ---
**Author:** ![Moriarty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moriarty/32/49_2.png) [@Moriarty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moriarty)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2026, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/36 "2026-09-22T00:31:25Z")
> [@fachverwirrt](#): > > I don’t think language is really up to the task of describing any sensation that somebody hasn’t experienced > [@Moris](#): > > Languages are just not good enough for describing qualia. I think you are both underestimating the importance of poetry. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2026, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/37 "2026-09-22T14:04:35Z")
> [@Moriarty](#): > > But how would you describe an orgasm to somebody who never had one? I’m curious how the description would go. I’ve heard an orgasm described by a doctor as “a pleasurable epileptic fit”. I don’t know how accurate that is. And I’ve never had an epileptic fit. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2026, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/38 "2026-09-22T14:06:52Z")
Or fiction. I’m not saying it’s always good fiction, but if you want to know what women think orgasms feel like, romance novels are not a bad place to start. Or read some erotica. People have been trying to describe what that feels like for a long time. Lately I’ve taken to describing the details more than the sensation directly. I believe it was Chuck Pahlaniuk who said in an action story, never describe the pain directly. Describe all the little details around it and the reader will feel the pain. I’ve found that effective for pain, and maybe it’s effective for pleasure, too. Something to experiment with. And no thread on this subject would be complete without the Bad Sex in Fiction Awards: [https://literaryreview.co.uk/bad-sex-in-fiction-award](https://literaryreview.co.uk/bad-sex-in-fiction-award) ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2026, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/39 "2026-09-23T14:22:32Z")
Listen to the finale of Wagner’s “Tristan und Isolde”, sometimes called “Liebestod” or “the death of Isolde”. The last 30 seconds or so are the musical equivalent of an orgasm. ---
**Author:** ![Al128](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/al128/32/16541_2.png) [@Al128](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Al128)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2026, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186/40 "2026-09-23T21:07:28Z")
> [@EinsteinsHund](#): > > And they differ, much. I’ve had orgasms when I thought “this is a cosmic event!”, and some when I thought “meh, slightly better than a sneeze.”. … and just slightly more messy jokes aside: I am surprised I haven’t read the word “spasm” so far … (at least [ctrl][f] comes up empty) … buildup with pleasurable spasmic release [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-describe-an-orgasm-not-seeking-sex-stories/1033186.md?page=3)