# How would you feel if you anonomously duped in an online relationship? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 25, 2014, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-feel-if-you-anonomously-duped-in-an-online-relationship/684551 "2014-03-25T20:26:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-feel-if-you-anonomously-duped-in-an-online-relationship/684551/1 "2014-03-25T20:26:39Z")
So, from **Leaffan** ’s thread about his newest sexting buddy: [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/newreply.php?do=newreply&p=17228322](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/newreply.php?do=newreply&p=17228322) > [@The perils of Internet dating sites and finding a match 2,000 miles away](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perils-of-internet-dating-sites-and-finding-a-match-2-000-miles-away/684338/1): > > The thing is, we then traded phone numbers, and started sending a few texts here and there. I have yet to speak with her > > \ > > We have traded pictures with one another; nothing untoward. > > \ > > She’s a wonderful lady, and to be honest we have, by text and email **had some rather erotic exchanges to the point of “happy ending.”** We communicate daily now. Sometimes dozens and dozens of text messages. > [@The perils of Internet dating sites and finding a match 2,000 miles away](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-perils-of-internet-dating-sites-and-finding-a-match-2-000-miles-away/684338/30): > > You haven’t talked to her on the phone or Skyped with her by now? Dude. > > \ > > That’s a mannnn, baby. So if you started a sexting relationship with someone that you thought you were compatible with (opposite sex if you are hetero, or same sex if you are homo); you got off multiple times in sexting dialogue with that individual, but you later learned that the other person was not as they had represented themselves, as proposed by **Dorjän** above. How would this make you feel emotionally? Would you feel violated, betrayed, curious, mleh, or not really care? I honestly am unsure how I would react, as I haven’t ever put myself in that type of situation, but believe that I would probably feel more foolish than anything else and would probably laugh it off. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-feel-if-you-anonomously-duped-in-an-online-relationship/684551/2 "2014-03-25T21:33:28Z")
When I forayed into online dating on Match I was pleasantly surprised to be contacted immediately by an attractive woman. It became quickly clear that it was a scam. I was able to figure out a profile of scammers pretty quickly. [ol] [li]Profile pictures were of very attractive women but not outrageously so. 7 or 8s not 10s.[/li][li]Their location settings were very broad. (anyone within 1,000 miles for instance)[/li][li]The photos looked a little too good like they were taken by a professional.[/li][li]The woman was not too young but still on the young side. Late 20s early 30s.[/li][li]They had their height preference set wide open. 3" to 8"[/li][li]They looked vaguely Eastern European.[/li][li]They contacted me. BIG red flag.[/li][/ol] Luckily I met my girlfriend on the first face to face date I had on Match. I would guess that scammers and catfish are an even bigger problem on paid sites. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-feel-if-you-anonomously-duped-in-an-online-relationship/684551/3 "2014-03-25T21:50:39Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > [ul] > [li]They had their height preference set wide open. 3" to 8"[/li][/ul] 3 to 8 inches? That wasn’t height, dude, and which site were you on? ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-feel-if-you-anonomously-duped-in-an-online-relationship/684551/4 "2014-03-25T21:57:08Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > 3 to 8 inches? That wasn’t height, dude, and which site were you on? Have we learned nothing from Spinal Tap? ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-feel-if-you-anonomously-duped-in-an-online-relationship/684551/5 "2014-03-25T22:00:46Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > 3 to 8 inches? That wasn’t height, dude, and which site were you on? Oops, 3’ to 8’. Or inches whatever. > [@](#): > > Have we learned nothing from Spinal Tap? Always stuff a cucumber in your pants? ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2014, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-feel-if-you-anonomously-duped-in-an-online-relationship/684551/6 "2014-03-25T22:18:59Z")
Back in the late 90’s when I got my first computer ,I ventured off into one of those AOL chat rooms. Going in, I had no intention of “sexting” with anyone. I was just curious. Anyway, some woman IM’ed me. One thing led to another and I was quite surprised to find myself getting into this thing that I had previously found amusing. It wasn’t until after the fact that I thought to myself: “Ya’ know, there’s really no way for me to know for sure if that was actually a woman.” I laughed it off. (I never did it again, but I laughed it off.) ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2014, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-feel-if-you-anonomously-duped-in-an-online-relationship/684551/7 "2014-03-26T03:00:37Z")
Unless you have met them or skype’d etc, assume everything they’ve said is a lie. ---
**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2014, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-feel-if-you-anonomously-duped-in-an-online-relationship/684551/8 "2014-03-26T05:26:09Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > 3 to 8 inches? That wasn’t height, dude, and which site were you on? “Sorry, I’m not interested in being friends with midgets. Midgets piss me off. Frowny face.” I don’t think you have to be a homophobe (alter term as necessary) to be pissed off by someone lying about their gender. Hell, the ol’ “posted photos were 5 years and 30 pounds ago” trick is bad enough, and that (might) be a smaller attraction loss than wrong gender. You wasted time and effort in this “relationship,” and now a lying stranger has your dick pics. ---
**Author:** ![Thylacine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thylacine/32/1143_2.png) [@Thylacine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thylacine)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2014, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-would-you-feel-if-you-anonomously-duped-in-an-online-relationship/684551/9 "2014-03-26T05:48:58Z")
In the mid 90s I was quite the personality in a lesbian chatroom somewhere, had a wonderful silly fling with someone who professed love and his maleness in the same sentence. He seemed truly crushed I wasn’t interested in pursuing things offline. The love bit was surprising but we knew 98% of the participants were blokes, that was half the fun - finding and outing them.