How would you like nu-trek to end

Cafe Society
21

A short opening scene in the Abrams-verse with two Federation Temporal Agents talking to each other.

“Wow, I’m sure glad we’re done with this universe.”

“Yeah, this alternate reality is fucked up!” (The word “fuck” exists in Abrams-Trek while “shit” continues to be the strongest curse world in the old continuity)

“This was sure a bitch to clean up and all because of friggin’ Spock and his blatant disregard for the temporal Prime Directive.”

“Well, we sure fixed him, didn’t we?” (Cut to a shot of old Spock sitting in a sparsely furnished apartment on Vulcan, eating Plomeek soup and watching re-runs of the Trip and T’Pol show, a Vulcan comedy about a long-suffering logical woman and her emotional human husband. We watch with Spock as Trip does something only a human would ever think of doing. Spock and T’Pol raise an eyebrow in response- the Vulcan equivalent of uproarious laughter.)

CUT TO:

The Enterprise-E, under the command of Jean-Luc Picard, The USS Titan under the command of William Riker and the Defiant under the command of Benjamin Sisko. The characters are chatting via subspace about how they are greatly amused by the ongoing trial of Katheryn Janeway for crimes against the timeline (because Starfleet has had enough and is now cracking down on this bullshit). They set off for destinations unknown, actually getting out there to explore some strange new worlds. Along the way they do not encounter any angry white men in uber-ships but they do get into various conflicts and they prevent or clean up various catastrophes. They learn things about themselves and the universe and they are happy at the end.

22

I’m gonna need some more time with “Into Darkness” to decide, but the first one was great fun and not at all the abomination some people make it out to me. Not to me, anyway, and I’m a full-on Trek fan.

23

Yeah, but I was being sarcastic. I don’t feel that any part of me, real or symbolic, was in any way even metaphorically raped, but I do feel the movies insulted my intelligence.

24

The original series still exist, nobody has taken that away from you.

Yes, the new movies are problematic in some ways. AS WERE THE OLD FUCKING SERIES.

I recall the onion headline: Trekkies Bash New Star Trek Film As ‘Fun, Watchable’

25

More than the endless and idiotic technobabble handwaving from TNG?

26

The possibility of the original series continuing has been taken away from me.

27

Do like.

28

That’s just another flavor of stupid.