# How young is too young to get married? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 19, 2019, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902 "2019-08-19T19:59:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![SuntanLotion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suntanlotion/32/16165_2.png) [@SuntanLotion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuntanLotion)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2019, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/61 "2019-08-21T18:55:41Z")
Seeing as how, nowadays, people are having more children before marriage, I think its a bad idea to make the age higher for marriage. if anything, it would relieve the government of all the food stamps and money they insist on paying to women who think its financially better to keep having kids out of wedlock cause the governments paying for it. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2019, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/62 "2019-08-21T20:22:56Z")
:: Lawnchair, check:: :: Popcorn, check:: ---
**Author:** ![Royal\_Nonesutch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecb155/32.png) [@Royal\_Nonesutch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Royal_Nonesutch)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2019, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/63 "2019-08-21T20:32:29Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > [In the US](http://theconversation.com/child-marriage-is-still-legal-in-the-us-88846). Twenty five states have NO legal minimum age for marriage, all it takes is a judge to sign off on it and/or parental consent. Gawddamn my own wicked eyes. Every day I am more and more glad to be far done gone of the unholy shit-showe that is 2019’s United States of America. Even the mollyfocking Taliban must be saying “Hey America, we get that you’re the Great Satan and all, but really, TEN?!? C’mon bro, that shit is serious wack.” ---
**Author:** ![Baron\_Greenback](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baron_greenback/32/48_2.png) [@Baron\_Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baron_Greenback)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2019, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/64 "2019-08-21T21:23:13Z")
In Scotland a 16-year-old can get married without parental consent, and can enter into a legal contract too (although with the latter there’s an age-related safeguard in the event of a dispute). The number of 16 and 17-year-olds who do either thing is not large though. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2019, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/65 "2019-08-22T13:44:48Z")
> [@Royal\_Nonesutch](#): > > Gawddamn my own wicked eyes. > > Every day I am more and more glad to be far done gone of the unholy shit-showe that is 2019’s United States of America. > > Even the mollyfocking Taliban must be saying “Hey America, we get that you’re the Great Satan and all, but really, TEN?!? C’mon bro, that shit is serious wack.” But be honest. How often does that happen? You make it sounds like hundreds of 12 year old girls are getting married everyday. In fact, it is so damn rare is why it makes the news. [NOW contrast that to Iran where 6%, YES SIX percent of Iranian girls get married between the ages of 10-14.](https://iran-hrm.com/index.php/2019/01/15/6-of-iranian-girls-get-married-between-10-14-years-of-age-mp-says/) ---
**Author:** ![SmartAleq](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smartaleq/32/163_2.png) [@SmartAleq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmartAleq)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2019, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/66 "2019-08-22T15:06:19Z")
[A 2018 study by Alyssa Koski and Jodi Heymann found that approximately 6.2 of every 1,000 children surveyed had ever been married.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_marriage_in_the_United_States#Statistics) Whataboutism is a very ugly look when discussing child rape. As a country we ostensibly take a very dim view of some of the regressive practices tolerated elsewhere in the world and if we’re gonna be the moral arbiters we really need to clean the shit out of the corners of our own house first. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2019, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/67 "2019-08-22T20:01:16Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > [A 2018 study by Alyssa Koski and Jodi Heymann found that approximately 6.2 of every 1,000 children surveyed had ever been married.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_marriage_in_the_United_States#Statistics) > > Whataboutism is a very ugly look when discussing child rape. As a country we ostensibly take a very dim view of some of the regressive practices tolerated elsewhere in the world and if we’re gonna be the moral arbiters we really need to clean the shit out of the corners of our own house first. I would like to check the numbers on that statistic. for example break it down by age and I think you would find most at 16 and older. Break it down further by ethnicity and you would find its mostly certain ethnic groups. Then remember how we value and celebrate diversity! ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2019, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/68 "2019-08-22T20:20:28Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > I would like to check the numbers on that statistic. for example break it down by age and I think you would find most at 16 and older. Correct. > [@](#): > > According to Frontline, who looked at almost 200,000 cases of child marriage from 2000-2015: > > 67% of the children were aged 17. > 29% of the children were aged 16. > 4% of the children were aged 15. > \<1% of the children were aged 14 and under. > Overall there were 51 cases of 13-year-olds getting married, and 6 cases of 12-year-olds getting married.[10] So yes, the huge majority are 16 or older. > [@](#): > > Break it down further by ethnicity and you would find its mostly certain ethnic groups. The Wiki cite talks a little about ethnicity - > [@](#): > > U.S.-born black girls are about 1.5 times more likely to marry underage than U.S.-born white girls.[44] > > … > > The Koski/Heymann study found child marriage was higher among girls than among boys (6.8 vs. 5.7 per 1,000), and was lower among white non-Hispanic children (5.0 per 1,000) than among almost every other racial or ethnic group studied; it was especially high among children of American Indian or Chinese descent (10.3 and 14.2, respectively).[38] Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2019, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/69 "2019-08-23T02:57:57Z")
My nephew was 18 and married a 16-year old (but they were in LOOOOOOOOOOVE!) and that was a complete disaster. Of course, my first wife and I were in our mid-20s and THAT was a complete disaster, as well. “C’est la vie, say the old folks, it goes to show you never can tell.” ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2019, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/70 "2019-08-23T03:22:24Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > Correct. > So yes, the huge majority are 16 or older. > The Wiki cite talks a little about ethnicity - > Regards, > > The Koski/Heymann study found child marriage was higher among girls than among boys (6.8 vs. 5.7 per 1,000), and was lower among white non-Hispanic children (5.0 per 1,000) than among almost every other racial or ethnic group studied; it was especially high among children of American Indian or Chinese descent (10.3 and 14.2, respectively).[38] > > Shodan I didnt know it was common among Indians and Chinese. But then, people say we should embrace all diversity. ---
**Author:** ![Dereknocue67](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6de8d8/32.png) [@Dereknocue67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dereknocue67)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2019, 8:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/71 "2019-08-23T08:34:44Z")
Wait to marry until after your child bearing years and then continue to enjoy your contented, extravagant and carefree life. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2019, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/72 "2019-08-23T14:32:50Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > I didnt know it was common among Indians and Chinese. It isn’t very common, just that when it does happen, it is more likely to be one of those groups. In my area, we have a lot of Hmong immigrants, and it happens among them too. Less as they become Americanized, but no doubt that is true of any immigrant population. I know a couple who got married when they were both sixteen. No pregnancy, and they are/were both non-minority - they just decided to get married. They are going strong now forty-some years later. He ran the service that collected dead animals from my father’s veterinary practice, and also had a contract with the county to collect road kill. Like Jeff the Knacker Man in the James Herriot books. Also like Jeff, fairly well-to-do. He says that doing jobs nobody else wants, or thinks of, is a steady income. My folks were married when they were both nineteen. Their seventieth anniversary is in September. I was 26 when I married, and our thirty seventh was in May. But seventy years ago, things and societal expectations were different. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![FCB13](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/278dde/32.png) [@FCB13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FCB13)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2019, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/73 "2019-08-23T16:40:17Z")
Had a high school classmate who had been married three times by the age of 25. One of many reasons why I never got married. ---
**Author:** ![Pantastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3bc359/32.png) [@Pantastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pantastic)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2019, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/74 "2019-08-23T18:55:02Z")
I think that getting married to someone you’ve known for less than two years is almost certainly a bad idea, there’s a lot of incompatibility that doesn’t show itself in a shorter relationship. But I don’t support making it a legal requirement, because that isn’t going to stop people from making bad decisions. It’s a lot like states that require a 1 year separation before a no-fault divorce - people engage in the separation to meet the legal requirement, but mentally ditch the marriage and go on with their lives while waiting for the technicality of the paperwork. > [@Procrustus](#): > > Yeah, as far as I know the government considers 18 year-olds full adults (except for drinking) (which is the topic for another thread This isn’t correct - in the US federal and state governments have 21 year old cutoffs for other laws, notably firearm purchase/posession/carry, gambling and entering casinos, tobacco use and purchase, marijuana use and purchase, age of consent laws, and some medical procedures. The details vary from state to state, but there are definitely areas other than alcohol that have a 21 cutoff. > [@dalej42](#): > > Let me clarify, I don’t want a law preventing people over 18 from getting married, I just don’t think it is a good idea. I’m biased because I’ve just seen one marriage end in a horrible, bitter breakup, ages 22 and 24. I’ve seen plenty of non-marriages end in horrible, bitter breakups so I’m not sure how having people live together and entwine finances, then go through a horrible, bitter breakup with less legal framework for separating it really improves things. If we’re doing anaecdotes, I know a couple that dated all the way from middle school to college, got married after graduation (at 22/23, so above your cutoff), and then had a complete separation six months after the marriage with a divorce following soon after. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2019, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/75 "2019-08-26T03:59:38Z")
I don’t have any strong beliefs about this. I would say many people might be better off waiting until 25 or so. But I know people who married much earlier and have had long and happy marriages. They say that to pick the best restaurant, walk past 37% of them and pick the next one which is better than those. That doesn’t really work with dating, though. ---
**Author:** ![MarvinKitFox](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ba0ec/32.png) [@MarvinKitFox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MarvinKitFox)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2019, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/76 "2019-08-26T06:32:39Z")
> [@Joey\_P](#): > > We can restrict the age to 30, and there’s going to be plenty of cases of people that got married at 30 and divorced at 32, just like there are cases of people that got married at 25 and divorced at 45. And cases of people that got married at 78, divorced at 80. This is a completely meaningless statistic. ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2019, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/77 "2019-08-27T00:37:15Z")
> [@Pantastic](#): > > I think that getting married to someone you’ve known for less than two years is almost certainly a bad idea. I agree with you even though I am an extreme exception to that rule. My wife and I got married after only knowing each other for 6 weeks. And no, she wasn’t pregnant and no, there were no cultural dynamics. We just had a whirlwind romance and decided to go to the courthouse and tie the knot. I was 19 she was 20. That was almost 40 years ago! If any of our 3 kids had done what we did I would have had the same conniption our parents had. Though we were both already out of their homes and on our own. ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2019, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/78 "2019-08-29T16:34:46Z")
> [@SmartAleq](#): > > [In the US](http://theconversation.com/child-marriage-is-still-legal-in-the-us-88846). Twenty five states have NO legal minimum age for marriage, all it takes is a judge to sign off on it and/or parental consent. … This line struck me as especially mind-boggling: "Some religious conservatives worry that without access to marriage, pregnant girls might turn to abortion. " Er… whatever happened to “teaching abstinence is all we need to do”??? ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2019, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/79 "2019-08-29T17:01:22Z")
> [@Royal\_Nonesutch](#): > > Gawddamn my own wicked eyes. > > Every day I am more and more glad to be far done gone of the unholy shit-showe that is 2019’s United States of America. > > Even the mollyfocking Taliban must be saying “Hey America, we get that you’re the Great Satan and all, but really, TEN?!? C’mon bro, that shit is serious wack.” To be fair, marriage at age 10 is pretty uncommon in the US. [Other countries](https://nypost.com/2010/02/14/10-years-old-and-divorced/), [it’s not as rare.](https://data.unicef.org/topic/child-protection/child-marriage/) Annoyingly, that Unicef link doesn’t have figures for western Europe or North / South America. [Wikipedia has an article](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_age_at_first_marriage)on average marriage age, which shows the US at being mid-to-late 20s (and Canada being slightly higher). ---
**Author:** ![CelticKnot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/celticknot/32/3392_2.png) [@CelticKnot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CelticKnot)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2019, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902/80 "2019-08-31T01:00:16Z")
> [@Mama\_Zappa](#): > > _ **There are numerous studies suggesting that premarital counselling can lead to lower divorce rates.** _ Well, I got lots of hits when I googled it, I don’t know if they’re the same study being cited by different groups or not… > [@Joey\_P](#): > > …Why should the government (or anyone else) tell two consenting adults that they’re not allowed to get married because, based on nothing more than their age, decide they aren’t ready. > > _ **I’d sooner see all the legal/tax/insurance issues that come with being married, be the same for single people and get the government out of the marriage business altogether** _. What I was going to say. In my family, we don’t mess around. I met my future husband at the first meeting for teachers in August. We got married the Saturday after our contract was done in June. 23 years ago. One sister called home from college to announce that she had met the man she was going to marry. In September. She was 19 when they married, and recently celebrated 33 years. Another sister was planning the wedding before I had ever heard of the guy. They met on a double date, and left their own dates behind. They’ve been married a little longer than we have. Age or how long a couple have been together don’t dictate how a marriage will work. I suspect a lot depends on family. My parents have been together 54 years. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/how-young-is-too-young-to-get-married/838902.md?page=3)