# Humor and Mortally wounding words. **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [June 4, 2004, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669 "2004-06-04T18:14:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![P\_T](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a587f6/32.png) [@P\_T](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/P_T)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/1 "2004-06-04T18:14:46Z")
What is the difference? So to some of us Viagra jokes are funny, as well as Lame Men jokes. To others they are seen as attacks on the very foundation of a persons psyche. So what exactly is the difference? For instance here is a joke I saw at another message board. What’s 18-21 inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? . . Crib death. Ouch. Now that one is right on that line. So, I guess the question is, where is that line for you? ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/2 "2004-06-04T18:25:21Z")
That line is blurred. Your example joke IMO is not funny. I doubt many people would find it so. The line for me is drawn at most discrimination jokes (I will find the odd dumb-blonde joke or nagging wife joke funny) and all death, abuse jokes (meaning I won’t find them funny) ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/3 "2004-06-04T18:29:54Z")
'If I fall down a manhole, that’s tragedy. If you fall down a manhole, that’s comedy." - Mel Brooks ---
**Author:** ![Sat\_on\_Cookie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/71c47a/32.png) [@Sat\_on\_Cookie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sat_on_Cookie)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/4 "2004-06-04T18:33:09Z")
Well, I guess the short answer is that humor is subjective. But explain something to me. Why do you find the “crib death” joke funny? I don’t find it funny in the least bit; not even in the “it’s just wrong to be laughing at that, but I’m laughing anyway” way. It’s tasteless, has the potential to be beyond hurtful if said to the wrong person, etc. What makes it funny _to you_? ---
**Author:** ![Chastain86](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Chastain86](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chastain86)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/5 "2004-06-04T18:34:03Z")
> [@Rufus Xavier](#): > > 'If I fall down a manhole, that’s tragedy. If you fall down a manhole, that’s comedy." - Mel Brooks I always thought it was “If I stub my toe, that’s tragedy. If you fall down a manhole, that’s comedy.” 😕 Regardless, it IS a pretty blurry line. Perfect example would be Marvin getting shot in the face by Travolta in “Pulp Fiction” – someone getting shot in the face, by itself, isn’t funny, but the circumstances surrounding it made laughing the only natural response. I think one of the funniest bits in SNL history was Richard Pryor and Chevy Chase’s “job interview word association” segment. Very, VERY funny, and yet so completely offensive that it’s unlikely it’ll ever see air again, even in reruns. The nature of comedy is and always has been subjective. That’s why it works. ---
**Author:** ![P\_T](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a587f6/32.png) [@P\_T](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/P_T)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/6 "2004-06-04T18:45:48Z")
> [@](#): > > The nature of comedy is and always has been subjective. That’s why it works. See, I agree with that completely. So what is the point of saying “That’s just not funny.” Obviously to someone it is. I have a pretty dark sense of humor I guess, but I think the death jokes and such are funny. It’s not that I wish death on anyone, particularly not a child as I posted above, but I do appreciate the shock value it has, as well as the obvious twist. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/7 "2004-06-04T18:51:27Z")
I’ll hear a joke like the one in the OP and rather than laugh, I’ll say “Man! That is dark!” However, I do appreciate the clever aspect of the joke. I just do. But funny it ain’t. ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/8 "2004-06-04T18:56:31Z")
> [@Chastain86](#): > > I always thought it was “If I stub my toe, that’s tragedy. If you fall down a manhole, that’s comedy.” 😕 you’re right. And it’s a better line. I should have known better than try to quote something from my sieve-like brain without something to back it up. then again, check this [link](http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Mel_Brooks/) : it quotes Brooks as saying: Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die. Anyway, humor’s subjectivity is the point. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/45deac/32.png) [@Evil\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_One)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/9 "2004-06-04T19:31:54Z")
I am quite desensitized and can separate humor from reality. My first instinct at the joke in the OP was to laugh. Had I or someone in my family been affected by SIDS, I probably would not have. But I’ve never been disgusted at a joke like that. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/10 "2004-06-04T19:51:38Z")
> [@Evil One](#): > > I am quite desensitized and can separate humor from reality. My first instinct at the joke in the OP was to laugh. Had I or someone in my family been affected by SIDS, I probably would not have. But I’ve never been disgusted at a joke like that. You kidding? Dead baby jokes are the very apex of comedy. Or they were, until they were supplanted by elephant jokes. But I see threads like this, and I can only ask one question: How many Harvard girls does it take to change a lightbulb? ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/11 "2004-06-04T19:58:36Z")
I don’t find the OPs joke funny only because I first heard it about 18 years ago. So many of the ‘shocking’ jokes in the world just aren’t funny to me, because a) I’ve heard them ALL and b) I am NOT desensitized to violence at all. Any kind of violence makes me very sad and uncomfortable. Just keep this in mind when posting jokes to a message board or whathaveyou: You don’t KNOW everyone’s sense of humor. I guarantee a dozen or so women on this board have experienced crib death. I was prescribed Viagra due to sexual response disorder. Not able to have an orgasm with your husband? I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. So, no, those jokes aren’t funny. But I’m sure this thread will go to 11 pages of ‘shocking dead baby’ jokes with everyone trying to outdo each other with how sick their senses of humor can get. ---
**Author:** ![stpauler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@stpauler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stpauler)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/12 "2004-06-04T20:17:25Z")
David Cross’s two albums have a lot of dark humor in them and some seem a bit tangental from the OP’s humor. It is very subjective, some can laugh at the Marx Brothers, others at Dennis Miller arcane references, or at Dave Chappelle’s borderline racist humor. I think the problem is trying to attach morality to a joke. I’m putting this as a spoiler so this isn’t construed as a joke thread… [spoiler] I saw a t-shirt on line that said: " I can get any woman I want. I’m a rapist". Horribly offensive and a very dark shirt and I don’t know who would wear that around. At the same time, it did make me smirk because it was the shocking quality of the humor. Does that mean I condone rape or violence towards women? NO. That could be because I can delineate between a joke and a statement.[/spoiler] ---
**Author:** ![The\_Man\_With\_The\_Golden\_Gun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dc4da7/32.png) [@The\_Man\_With\_The\_Golden\_Gun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Man_With_The_Golden_Gun)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/13 "2004-06-04T20:53:24Z")
Humor is subjective. Some people laugh at Jon Stewart, I think he’s about as funny as a goiter. Some people like black jokes, others think they are offensive. I found the joke in the OP mildly amusing. My mom read it, and she laughed her ass off. Different people, different tastes. ---
**Author:** ![Sat\_on\_Cookie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/71c47a/32.png) [@Sat\_on\_Cookie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sat_on_Cookie)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/14 "2004-06-04T21:01:56Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > You kidding? Dead baby jokes are the very apex of comedy. Or they were, until they were supplanted by elephant jokes. If dead baby jokes are your apex of comedy, then I hope you cut your finger while stubbing your toe falling down an open manhole and winding up in a sewer. Not really; just joking. Actually, the apex of comedy _to me_ is Monty Python (anything) and Steve Martin…I could watch the man sit in a chair for 2 hours and 8 minutes. But I get that some people hate him. Yup, it’s subjective. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/15 "2004-06-04T21:12:47Z")
> [@Sat on Cookie](#): > > If dead baby jokes are your apex of comedy, then I hope you cut your finger while stubbing your toe falling down an open manhole and winding up in a sewer. As long as I break my fall by landing on a pile of dead babies. 😉 Seriously, I don’t tell those jokes, or find them amusing, anymore. Same with Helen Keller jokes. In my college years I thought they were edgy and shocking and daring. Now I find them to be a bit tiresome. One of the benefits of so-called maturity, I guess. There is a secret to telling dead baby jokes, though, and it’s this: Know your audience. As was mentioned before, people have odd notions of what’s funny and what’s offensive. While in college one day a few of us were telling jokes, and one guy in particular (let’s call him Scott) was telling the most hideous of dead baby jokes, and we were all yucking it up pretty loudly. I then told a dead messiah joke, and Scott got all offended and left the room. Who knew? ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/16 "2004-06-04T21:16:38Z")
Humour requires risk to have vitality. But there is an important part to humour of fitting your joke to the audience. You need to weigh the quality (funnyness) of the joke against the risk of offense from the joke. There are few jokes that cannot possibly cause offence (imagine an Elephant joke said to someone whose child had just been crushed to death by an escaped circus Elephant) but most jokes have times and places where they are valid. So the OP joke has its place, but it is old, so many who might find it ammusing have allready heard it, and it concerns a very sensitive issue which could potentially cause lots of offense, so it would not be a joke for which worthwhile use is easy to find. What’s 18-21 inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? . A dildo dipped in tabasco sauce. ---
**Author:** ![Sat\_on\_Cookie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/71c47a/32.png) [@Sat\_on\_Cookie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sat_on_Cookie)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/17 "2004-06-04T21:18:00Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > As long as I break my fall by landing on a pile of dead babies. 😉 Now, I’d be remiss if I didn’t admit that I laughed at this, and I never laugh at dead baby jokes. So I guess I blow my own argument – that one particular type of humor is just _not funny._ Perhaps it’s knowing your audience and circumstance and blah blah blah. ---
**Author:** ![Chastain86](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Chastain86](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chastain86)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/18 "2004-06-04T21:23:04Z")
> [@Bippy the Beardless](#): > > What’s 18-21 inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? > . > A dildo dipped in tabasco sauce. Now **THAT** I laughed at. ---
**Author:** ![Sat\_on\_Cookie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/71c47a/32.png) [@Sat\_on\_Cookie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sat_on_Cookie)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/19 "2004-06-04T21:25:06Z")
> [@Bippy the Beardless](#): > > (imagine an Elephant joke said to someone whose child had just been crushed to death by an escaped circus Elephant) Well, exactly. I mean, if that were to have happened, you would think that they would always sort of be known as “Marty and Inga whose child was crushed to death by a circus elephant” and that people would know to avoid such jokes. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2004, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669/20 "2004-06-04T21:30:42Z")
> [@Chastain86](#): > > I think one of the funniest bits in SNL history was Richard Pryor and Chevy Chase’s “job interview word association” segment. Very, VERY funny, and yet so completely offensive that it’s unlikely it’ll ever see air again, even in reruns. I don’t know about that. It _has_ been used, at least partially, in SNL retrospectives. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humor-and-mortally-wounding-words/248669.md?page=2)