# Humorous signs and warnings **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** comedian-jokes\ **Created:** [March 6, 2022, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564 "2022-03-06T15:16:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2022, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/81 "2022-03-16T16:32:58Z")
(snerk) 😄 ---
**Author:** ![aurora\_maire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aurora_maire/32/328_2.png) [@aurora\_maire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aurora_maire)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2022, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/82 "2022-03-16T21:40:32Z")
This was on the fence of a business next door to an old workplace. I’m willing to bet the owners saw nothing wrong with it. [https://imgur.com/sK6Dnk2](https://imgur.com/sK6Dnk2) ---
**Author:** ![saucywench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/85e7bf/32.png) [@saucywench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saucywench)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2022, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/83 "2022-03-17T15:17:14Z")
Just curious! In which state is this sign located? ---
**Author:** ![Treppenwitz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treppenwitz/32/3445_2.png) [@Treppenwitz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Treppenwitz)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2022, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/84 "2022-03-17T17:11:18Z")
> [@Crane](#): > > Notice above urinals on Air Base near Amarillo TX: > > “Craft with short stacks and low manifold pressure, please taxi up close” This reminded me of something. There was a time when every British pub seemed to have the same two signs - so, very tedious, but if you haven’t come across them before, _maybe_ worth a smile. Behind the bar: _Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends._ In the men’s washroom: _We aim to please. You aim too, please._ j ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2022, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/85 "2022-03-17T17:16:30Z")
There was a law passed in New Orleans that required bars to post a sign warning pregnant women of the dangers of alcohol to the developing fetus. Early on someone noticed that the law did not specify where the sign had to be situated. The first year the law was in effect we were there and I noticed the signs…in men’s rooms. ---
**Author:** ![aurora\_maire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aurora_maire/32/328_2.png) [@aurora\_maire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aurora_maire)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2022, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/86 "2022-03-17T17:46:36Z")
> [@saucywench](#): > > Just curious! In which state is this sign located? Tennessee ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2022, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/87 "2022-03-17T18:03:38Z")
I don’t see anything wrong with the sign. It’s a clear indication that one’s inner being has watched events at that location. ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2022, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/88 "2022-03-17T20:36:20Z")
> [@Treppenwitz](#): > > Behind the bar: _Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends._ Also seen :- _Please do not ask for credit, as a punch in the mouth often offends._ ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2022, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/89 "2022-03-17T21:33:13Z")
> [@pjd](#): > > > [@Treppenwitz](#): > > > > Behind the bar: _Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends._ > > Also seen :- > _Please do not ask for credit, as a punch in the mouth often offends._ [![](https://d3inagkmqs1m6q.cloudfront.net/2477/media-pics/e-781-in-god-we-trust-all-others-pay-cash-cast-iron-metal-wall-plaque-sign.jpg) ](https://d3inagkmqs1m6q.cloudfront.net/2477/media-pics/e-781-in-god-we-trust-all-others-pay-cash-cast-iron-metal-wall-plaque-sign.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2022, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/90 "2022-03-17T22:00:03Z")
[![](https://c8.alamy.com/comp/ACKRK9/sign-warns-do-not-feed-or-molest-alligators-at-lowry-park-zoo-in-tampa-ACKRK9.jpg) ](https://c8.alamy.com/comp/ACKRK9/sign-warns-do-not-feed-or-molest-alligators-at-lowry-park-zoo-in-tampa-ACKRK9.jpg) And on our trip from Virginia to Nevada and back, we saw arrows on the back of a tractor/trailor. A green arrow on the left said “Passing side”. A red arrow on the right said “Suicide”. ---
**Author:** ![mbh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@mbh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mbh)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2022, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/91 "2022-03-17T23:21:17Z")
An auto mechanic I used to go to, had a sign by the register: “Credit makes enemies. Let’s be friends.” Several Chinese restaurants in my town have signs that say, “Tipping is not a city in China.” ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2022, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/92 "2022-03-17T23:24:45Z")
> [@ekedolphin](#): > > [https://c8.alamy.com/comp/ACKRK9/sign-warns-do-not-feed-or-molest-alligators-at-lowry-park-zoo-in-tampa-ACKRK9.jpg](https://c8.alamy.com/comp/ACKRK9/sign-warns-do-not-feed-or-molest-alligators-at-lowry-park-zoo-in-tampa-ACKRK9.jpg) > > And on our trip from Virginia to Nevada and back, we saw arrows on the back of a tractor/trailor. > > A green arrow on the left said “Passing side”. A red arrow on the right said “Suicide”. I used to see that sort of thing all the time. “Safe side/Suicide” was common, but there were others. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2022, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/93 "2022-03-17T23:25:25Z")
A friend is a bartender. At weddings and other functions he has a tip-jar with signage: “Just put the tip in, it’ll feel good”. The grandmas (and others with good taste) roll their eyes. ---
**Author:** ![carrps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carrps/32/2957_2.png) [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2022, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/94 "2022-03-18T00:21:04Z")
We have a sign near our front door that reads: Death from the ankles down. With a silhouette of a dachshund. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2022, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/95 "2022-03-18T00:37:32Z")
A few from Japan … Switch on the fun: [![](https://i.imgur.com/SaCz3y0.jpg) ](https://i.imgur.com/SaCz3y0.jpg) Please be afraid: [![](https://i.imgur.com/zFsRGpB.jpeg) ](https://i.imgur.com/zFsRGpB.jpeg) We are so set in our ways: [![](https://i.imgur.com/yzKbTVl.jpeg) ](https://i.imgur.com/yzKbTVl.jpeg) Public execution: [![](https://i.imgur.com/U0KmtJs.jpeg) ](https://i.imgur.com/U0KmtJs.jpeg) ---
**Author:** ![Encinitas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2022, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/96 "2022-03-18T00:39:32Z")
Years ago I was on my way to the airport in San Francisco when I spotted a huge billboard depicting Wells Fargo’s classic stagecoach against a white background with the tag line “BUCK THE SYSTEM.” Someone had altered the “B” in an interesting way. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2022, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/97 "2022-03-18T01:02:36Z")
OK, now I’m trying to figure out what the heck that McDonald’s “Please be afraid” sign is trying to say… The first sentence is clear enough, even if a bit non-colloquial. “Afraid” should probably be “careful”. From there… I think they’re saying that dining is all on the first floor, but if you need to use the restrooms, they’re on the (otherwise unfinished) second floor? ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2022, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/98 "2022-03-18T01:05:52Z")
Ontario license plate: [![](https://i.imgur.com/xdOQSDK.jpg) ](https://i.imgur.com/xdOQSDK.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2022, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/99 "2022-03-18T01:10:55Z")
Bumper sticker: _“The weather is here. Wish you were beautiful.”_ ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2022, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564/100 "2022-03-18T01:43:52Z")
In Russia, there’s a home decor company called **F-ART**. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/humorous-signs-and-warnings/960564.md?page=6)