# Hun, Please tell me your mom will throw you out for having a boyfriend \_before\_ I become your first **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 5, 2012, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522 "2012-08-05T15:09:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Tad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/278dde/32.png) [@Tad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tad)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2012, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/61 "2012-08-22T23:29:32Z")
> [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](#): > > Slight epilogue: she told her mom she wanted to be with me and now I’m not allowed to see her any more. I went to her house to try to say goodbye, and her mom told me “Oh, you’re fine, you’ve done nothing wrong. It’s just that she isn’t ready to have a boyfriend; she has developmental disorders, and she isn’t 15 like she told you”. > > …She told me she was 16… I’m not even going to think too hard about that. Good job on “taking” that virginity, champ. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/62 "2012-08-23T00:41:38Z")
So now that you’re finished with the daughter, do you think you will be able to score with her mom? ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/63 "2012-08-23T00:49:33Z")
> [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](#): > > She’s 16, her mother meant something else (her _mental_ state). > > She didn’t seem it! Seriously! > [@Blackberry](#): > > Then why did her mother say she wasn’t FIFTEEN like she told you? Yeah, I’m having trouble parsing what the mom said to mean anything about her mental state. Creepy, dude. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/64 "2012-08-23T05:14:43Z")
Hey! I’ve got a new sig out of this thread! “Just do what Northern Piper advises. He’s wise.” - **Muffin**. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/65 "2012-08-23T05:20:44Z")
Sorry, no message. ---
**Author:** ![Beastly\_Rotter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/45deac/32.png) [@Beastly\_Rotter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beastly_Rotter)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/66 "2012-08-23T07:45:29Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > So you’ve bedded a woman old enough to be your mother, and you’ve statutorily raped a developmentally delayed youth. > > You should seek counselling and not have sex with anyone without prior approval by your counsellor. Yeah, but if you average them out it’s a normal healthy relationship with a 31 year old. ---
**Author:** ![Bass\_Chick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/43a26b/32.png) [@Bass\_Chick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bass_Chick)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/67 "2012-08-23T13:58:52Z")
Even if she wasn’t young or “developmentally delayed” this girl is bad news. She was smart enough to lie to you about her age. She was smart enough to sneak around and have a sexual relationship. She’s just not mature enough to appreciate the potential consequences. I’d hazard a guess that this isn’t the first time she’s put herself in harm’s way. I pity her mother. She has her job cut out trying to keep her child from winding up pregnant, with AIDS or dead because she went off with the wrong man. \*\*Your father is a wise man. Listen to him. \*\* 😉 ANY time that a relationship has to be hidden, there is something tainted about it. You deserve better than that. Learn from this experience and consider yourself lucky for dodging a bullet. Best wishes. ---
**Author:** ![Cheshire\_Human](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Cheshire\_Human](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheshire_Human)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/68 "2012-08-23T17:49:27Z")
> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#): > > Hide yo’ kids _and_ hide yo’ wife- **Budget Player Cadet** is on the loose! And yo’ mom. And Granny, too. While yer at it, don’t tell him where Great-Granny’s buried… Just to be safe. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2012, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/69 "2012-08-23T18:10:41Z")
What is the girl’s chronological age? And how do you know? ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 12:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/70 "2012-08-24T12:10:09Z")
> [@Tad](#): > > Good job on “taking” that virginity, champ. Yes, because it’s his fault that she lied to him about her age. Seriously, what is it about social threads that cause people to completely lose their ability to use their brain? How does it even make sense to make fun of someone for something they have no control over? Do you somehow think that making fun of him will prevent other people from lying to him? People make fun of me for how I think about social situations, but all I do is apply the same logic I would in other situations, rather than disengage my brain and accept the social mores and practices as being good because they are familiar. I deconstruct everything and put it back together in a rational manner. And this bullying is just irrational bullshit. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/71 "2012-08-24T12:44:50Z")
Big T, it is his responsibility as an adult to look before he leaps, particularly when it comes to popping the cherry of a youth. Her being developmentally delayed makes it all the more important for him to take care. Instead of acting responsibily, he puts his pecked in anything that will let him. ---
**Author:** ![Troppus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a587f6/32.png) [@Troppus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troppus)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/72 "2012-08-24T13:38:49Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Yes, because it’s his fault that she lied to him about her age. > > Seriously, what is it about social threads that cause people to completely lose their ability to use their brain? How does it even make sense to make fun of someone for something they have no control over? Do you somehow think that making fun of him will prevent other people from lying to him? > > People make fun of me for how I think about social situations, but all I do is apply the same logic I would in other situations, rather than disengage my brain and accept the social mores and practices as being good because they are familiar. I deconstruct everything and put it back together in a rational manner. > > And this bullying is just irrational bullshit. A man with sexual experience takes the virginity of a younger, inexperienced girl after just two weeks while knowing her mother disapproved and knowing he would soon leave the country. His actions were foolish, selfish, and irresponsible. He probably started the thread to brag about his sexual prowess, which became hilarious and kind of sad and shameful when the young lady’s limitations were revealed. Moral of the story: get the facts before you impulsively gratify yourself, and ensure that both parties have the legal and emotional ability to consent. If the OP is being bullied it is because he behaved like a cad. ---
**Author:** ![PoorYorick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecccb3/32.png) [@PoorYorick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PoorYorick)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/73 "2012-08-24T14:18:19Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > I have problems too. My boyfriend is too rich and his cock is too big. I’m thinking I should bring this up with my priest during confession, but am afraid to because he’ll tell me fornicating is a sin. What should I do? Priest: Three Hail Mary’s. MOL: But, Father, I’m not even Catholic. Priest: So what are you doing here? MOL: Father, I’m telling _everybody_. _rimshot_ ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/74 "2012-08-24T16:49:14Z")
Is anyone else getting _Arrested Development_ flashbacks or is it just me? ---
**Author:** ![Tad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/278dde/32.png) [@Tad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tad)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/75 "2012-08-24T17:55:57Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Yes, because it’s his fault that she lied to him about her age. > > Seriously, what is it about social threads that cause people to completely lose their ability to use their brain? How does it even make sense to make fun of someone for something they have no control over? Do you somehow think that making fun of him will prevent other people from lying to him? > > People make fun of me for how I think about social situations, but all I do is apply the same logic I would in other situations, rather than disengage my brain and accept the social mores and practices as being good because they are familiar. I deconstruct everything and put it back together in a rational manner. > > And this bullying is just irrational bullshit. You really do sound like a genius pioneer and all that, but as people have mentioned: yeah, it’s his fault. Part of his logic relied on figuring out whether or not he was breaking any laws, then side-stepping the the girl’s mother. The moment some kid says to you “don’t tell your mom in front of my mom that we’re dating!” is probably the moment you realize that she really shouldn’t be sexually active just yet. He’s a stupid 18 year old kid who wanted to get laid. I get it and I get it again. At the end of the day if he’s mature enough to be sexually active, he’s mature enough to work out all the angles to make sure it’s safe beyond being legal. Not to mention, like it’s been mentioned already, this kid just wanted to brag to the internet that he’s having sex. The fact that it turns out the girl is almost certainly younger than 14 years old just makes it sad and pathetic. And yes, his fault. Like people have mentioned, if he’s getting bullied it’s because he acted like a turd. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2012, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/76 "2012-08-24T21:34:37Z")
BPC, when do you plan on telling us about the pregnancy? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2012, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/77 "2012-08-25T00:12:01Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Yes, because it’s his fault that she lied to him about her age. According to the law, it very well could be. IIRC, saying, “But she swore she was 18!” isn’t a valid defense. Of course, that depends on whether or not he actually broke the law (it sounds like there might be a Romeo and Juliet clause, plus this is Germany). But dumping everything on the girl, while the guy gets off scot free is not only stupid, but a really shitty and sexist attitude. And HE’S the older of the two. ---
**Author:** ![Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/budget_player_cadet/32/205_2.png) [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Budget_Player_Cadet)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2012, 12:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/78 "2012-08-27T12:02:48Z")
> [@Troppus](#): > > He probably started the thread to brag about his sexual prowess You people need to stop assuming this. Huh, maybe it’s just that most of my real problems involve my dick? Maybe, just maybe, it’s that relationships are where I (like most men) have trouble and need advice from elders? _Maybe_ I was genuinely acting for advice on what to do, and not just trying to brag about fucking a legal girl _who I did not see as developmentally arrested_? Like, I spent a lot of time hanging out and talking with her, and I didn’t see _anything_ that made her seem dysfunctional at all. You people need to stop assuming that anyone who brings up sex in an issue they’re having is going for a stealth brag, because _that’s bullshit_. I didn’t address anything else because it’s pretty much on the mark (save for the lied about her age part; she’s 16 and her mom was referring to her mental age – something I still find bullshit), and yes, _I fucked up_, but will you stop assuming that I’m here to brag? ---
**Author:** ![Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/budget_player_cadet/32/205_2.png) [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Budget_Player_Cadet)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2012, 12:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/79 "2012-08-27T12:05:13Z")
> [@Tad](#): > > The moment some kid says to you “don’t tell your mom in front of my mom that we’re dating!” is probably the moment you realize that she really shouldn’t be sexually active just yet. The moment she told me that was the last time I saw her in person. So kindly fuck off with that noise, and at least _pretend_ you read the OP, k? ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2012, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522/80 "2012-08-27T12:22:07Z")
> [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](#): > > So kindly fuck off You want who to what? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hun-please-tell-me-your-mom-will-throw-you-out-for-having-a-boyfriend-_before_-i-become-your-first/630522.md?page=5)