# Hungry hyenas circling me **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [May 16, 2010, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691 "2010-05-16T23:41:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Leo\_Bloom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leo_bloom/32/10377_2.png) [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2010, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/1 "2010-05-16T23:41:35Z")
So I’m on the veldt, fall asleep, and I’m awoken by the blood-curdling (and annoying) barks of a pack of slavering starving hyenas circling me. What do I do? BTW, I have a revolver with one bullet in it. Could I figure out who the alpha-ist is, take him out, and have the rest of the troops scatter leaderless? ---
**Author:** ![boilercake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@boilercake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boilercake)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2010, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/2 "2010-05-16T23:51:22Z")
Well, I don’t even know if I’d think to figure out who the alpha is, I’d probably just shoot the most agressive animal and use the revolver to pistol-whip/beat the shit out of every thing that comes close to me. Just as I would with a group of dogs, wolves or people, for that matter. I would NOT shoot myself. ---
**Author:** ![Bewildebeest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/779978/32.png) [@Bewildebeest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bewildebeest)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2010, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/3 "2010-05-16T23:52:40Z")
No. Hyenas have a matriarchy. Taking her out might give you a little time though. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2010, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/4 "2010-05-16T23:57:17Z")
[Hyenas](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyena) are fairly large and pretty solidly built, I don’t think “pistol whipping” them is going to more than annoy them. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2010, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/5 "2010-05-16T23:58:37Z")
If there’s a tree nearby you might have a chance, otherwise you’re done. ---
**Author:** ![boilercake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@boilercake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boilercake)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/6 "2010-05-17T00:23:51Z")
> [@astro](#): > > [Hyenas](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyena) are fairly large and pretty solidly built, I don’t think “pistol whipping” them is going to more than annoy them. Shooting yourself then is a better altnerative? ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/7 "2010-05-17T01:29:02Z")
Just remember the old joke about the two hikers and the bear. You don’t have to actually fight off the hyenas; you just have to fight harder than the next prey. I’m not sure what the next prey would be, but it’s certainly worth trying (and a lot better odds than shooting yourself). ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/8 "2010-05-17T01:30:21Z")
They’ll probably take the gun from you and use it against you. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/9 "2010-05-17T03:26:18Z")
I have actually been awoken while camped on the savanna in Kenya by the blood-curdling yelps of a pack of hyenas about a hundred yards away. Fortunately for me, they were engaged in a battle royal with a pride of lions, so neither group of predators paid much attention to me. I still didn’t get much sleep that night. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/10 "2010-05-17T04:29:19Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > I have actually been awoken while camped on the savanna in Kenya by the blood-curdling yelps of a pack of hyenas about a hundred yards away. Fortunately for me, they were engaged in a battle royal with a pride of lions, so neither group of predators paid much attention to me. > > I still didn’t get much sleep that night. My worst nightmare. ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/11 "2010-05-17T04:30:28Z")
If you shoot one hyena, will the others then eat it, rather than you? ---
**Author:** ![Superhal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Superhal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superhal)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 8:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/12 "2010-05-17T08:17:41Z")
I’d shoot the guy who installed your door. ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 8:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/13 "2010-05-17T08:37:25Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > > [@Colibri](#): > > > > I have actually been awoken while camped on the savanna in Kenya by the blood-curdling yelps of a pack of hyenas about a hundred yards away. Fortunately for me, they were engaged in a battle royal with a pride of lions, so neither group of predators paid much attention to me. > > > > I still didn’t get much sleep that night. > > My worst nightmare. Mine too, except instead of hyenas they’re clowns, and instead of the veldt, I’m in a class (naked) that I hadn’t attended all year but I have to take the final exam anyway, which is really hard because I keep falling and falling and falling … ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/14 "2010-05-17T13:32:57Z")
I suggest spending your last moments to read _The Snows of Kilimanjaro_. ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/15 "2010-05-17T15:06:01Z")
I wonder if the OP knows he’s not being taken seriously because he didn’t put “need answer fast!” in the title. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/16 "2010-05-17T15:19:11Z")
> [@astro](#): > > If there’s a tree nearby you might have a chance, otherwise you’re done. Yup. Even a lone lion doesn’t stand a chance against a hyena pack. They have jaws that can snap a bone like a toothpick. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/17 "2010-05-17T15:56:30Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Yup. Even a lone lion doesn’t stand a chance against a hyena pack. They have jaws that can snap a bone like a toothpick. I can’t find a link at the moment but there’s a great video about this: A group of female lions are hunting and they pull down a gazelle at night and are ready to start eating when a pack of hyenas show up and chase them off. The lions all climb up into some low tree branches and look on as the hyenas eat their kill. Then without warning a huge male lion just explodes out of the tall grass and barrels right into the group of hyenas and tears their asses up. The song “My Boyfriend’s Back” is playing. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/18 "2010-05-17T17:00:57Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > I can’t find a link at the moment but there’s a great video about this: > > A group of female lions are hunting and they pull down a gazelle at night and are ready to start eating when a pack of hyenas show up and chase them off. The lions all climb up into some low tree branches and look on as the hyenas eat their kill. Then without warning a huge male lion just explodes out of the tall grass and barrels right into the group of hyenas and tears their asses up. The song “My Boyfriend’s Back” is playing. I’ve seen that sort of footage before. In one, a male lion chases down the alpha female hyena and kills her. A lone female won’t fare as well against hyenas, however. ---
**Author:** ![smiling\_bandit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@smiling\_bandit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smiling_bandit)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/19 "2010-05-17T17:02:24Z")
I don’t think hyenas climb, although there’s all kinds of other nasty stuff which does. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2010, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691/20 "2010-05-17T17:33:04Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > My worst nightmare. This was a campsite in Samburu National Park in Kenya. It was not exactly conducive to rest and relaxation. When we arrived, we noticed big piles of elephant dung near the campsite, so we were actually more concerned that elephants would come by at night. (Fortunately they didn’t show. Maybe the lions and hyenas were making too much noise.) And the river next to the campsite was full of huge Nile crocodiles. We decided not to go for a dip. And then there were the spitting cobras in the rock outcrop nearby… [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hungry-hyenas-circling-me/539691.md?page=2)