# Husbands, how do you cope..

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/husbands-how-do-you-cope/597632>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [September 26, 2011, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/husbands-how-do-you-cope/597632 "2011-09-26T04:36:00Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 3\
**Page:** 11

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Saintly\_Loser](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saintly_loser/32/4045_2.png) [@Saintly\_Loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saintly_Loser)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2011, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/husbands-how-do-you-cope/597632/201 "2011-10-08T20:17:43Z")

</div>

> [@MsWhatsit](#):
>
> Christ, **Saintly Loser** , that sucks. I have a really hard time understanding how anyone can suffer from this and not realize they have a problem. And even on my absolute worst days I can’t even imagine saying some of the things your wife said to you. I mean, I get that this manifests different ways for different people but that sounds completely intolerable.
> 
> I mean, if you made up a calendar and just made notes of the days where she behaves like this and then marked out the days where her period occurs and then showed this to her after a couple of months, you still think she’d be in denial about the correlation?

She probably would. Because there’s always some incident at the root of the rage that, no matter how trivial, can be thought of as the root cause. See the bit about not getting milk in my first post.

I’m just whining. Most of the time she’s great. She’s fantastic. Some of the time she’s nuts. That’s how it is.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Hello\_Again](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/85e7bf/32.png) [@Hello\_Again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hello_Again)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2011, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/husbands-how-do-you-cope/597632/202 "2011-10-08T20:22:34Z")

</div>

Just a thought. Have you asked whether she remembers being mad at you last tuesday (or whatever)? Was does she say? Does she remember being angry at all? If yes, does the item that made her angry seem just as important to her now?

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\
**Post date:** [October 9, 2011, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/husbands-how-do-you-cope/597632/203 "2011-10-09T02:38:14Z")

</div>

Take a look at this [emotional abuse](http://eqi.org/eabuse1.htm) website, **Saintly Loser.** Your wife might be great three weeks of the month, but one week of the month she is what sounds like emotionally abusive, and regardless of the cause, she needs to find a way to deal with it (other than treating you like her emotional punching bag). If the sexes were reversed here, and a woman was telling us that her husband drinks one week of the month and treats her like shit that week, I’d be saying the same things - this isn’t healthy for your relationship long-term, and it needs to be dealt with.

If she is completely unaware of how bad she gets, maybe try filming her.

[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/husbands-how-do-you-cope/597632.md?page=10)
