# Hypothetical: Get laid and save the world! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 18, 2014, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467 "2014-07-18T16:59:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/41 "2014-07-18T21:59:31Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > But if they’re 3 average people why assumed the hot one is any more offended? Since the chooser knows virtually nothing about the three people., the chooser has to make assumptions. The safest bet is that the hottie doesn’t want to have sex with you, the other two are more of an unknown variable. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/42 "2014-07-18T22:03:22Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > Maybe the ugly one really wants to get laid? Maybe the ugly one doesn’t want to get a laid but the hot one really really does? I’m choosing the hot one because she really really wants to get laid. > [@Shakes](#): > > Again, if the hot one is above what your used to getting, it’s a pretty safe bet she isn’t into you. The hot one is not above what I am used to getting so she is really into me. > [@](#): > > So you have to ask yourself “Which of these three women are least likely to be repulsed by me having sex with them?” I am really attractive. All three of these women would love to have sex with someone as attractive as I am. Just because you might be a fat disgusting pig with jacked up teeth and more back and feet hair than a bear and you smell like rotten fish doesn’t mean you should assume everyone else is. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/43 "2014-07-18T22:03:42Z")
Hot One! I’d FHRITP! ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/44 "2014-07-18T22:07:29Z")
> [@Drunky\_Smurf](#): > > Maybe the ugly one doesn’t want to get a laid but the hot one really really does? > > I’m choosing the hot one because she really really wants to get laid. > > The hot one is not above what I am used to getting so she is really into me. > > I am really attractive. All three of these women would love to have sex with someone as attractive as I am. > > Just because you might be a fat disgusting pig with jacked up teeth and more back and feet hair than a bear and you smell like rotten fish doesn’t mean you should assume everyone else is. Uh… Okay, thanks for playing. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/45 "2014-07-18T22:11:13Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > The safest bet is that the hottie doesn’t want to have sex with you, the other two are more of an unknown variable. There is no reason to believe this is true. ---
**Author:** ![Erdosain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/erdosain/32/7284_2.png) [@Erdosain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Erdosain)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/46 "2014-07-18T22:23:45Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > There is no reason to believe this is true. But don’t you understand? In **Shakes** ’s world, ugly chicks are absolutely gagging for it, willing to screw anyone with all their original fingers, whereas “hot chicks” can only abide touching modern-day Adonises. Seems straightforward, really. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/47 "2014-07-18T22:26:59Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > Uh… Okay, thanks for playing. :dubious: My scenario is just as valid as yours and a bit more truthful. I am really attractive. If you wanted us to follow your scenario you should have put it the OP and not after people didn’t give you the answers you wanted. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/48 "2014-07-18T22:28:40Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > There is no reason to believe this is true. I’m fairly certain the majority (not all of course) couples out there are more or less on the same level of attractiveness. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/49 "2014-07-18T22:35:01Z")
> [@Drunky\_Smurf](#): > > My scenario is just as valid as yours and a bit more truthful. I am really attractive. > If you wanted us to follow your scenario you should have put it the OP and not after people didn’t give you the answers you wanted. What the hell are you talking about? Please show me in this thread where where I show dissatisfaction with the answers given. People are allowed to debate philosophical questions with out being all pissy or rude about it like you are. Jeez, WTF did I do to offend you so? ---
**Author:** ![Hector\_St\_Clare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5ac83/32.png) [@Hector\_St\_Clare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hector_St_Clare)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/50 "2014-07-18T22:41:03Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > So if I don’t get off, the world gets offed. **running coach** wins the thread. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/51 "2014-07-18T22:53:28Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > Since the chooser knows virtually nothing about the three people., the chooser has to make assumptions. The safest bet is that the hottie doesn’t want to have sex with you, the other two are more of an unknown variable. I’ve been told that women are attracted more power than looks. I’m the guy who controls the fate of the world, so I think they all want to have sex with me. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/52 "2014-07-18T23:01:13Z")
> [@Procrustus](#): > > I’ve been told that women are attracted more power than looks. I’m the guy who controls the fate of the world, so I think they all want to have sex with me. Brilliant! Thinking about this further, I think the only real moral choice would be to put all three names in a hat and randomly select one. ---
**Author:** ![TimeWinder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bcef8e/32.png) [@TimeWinder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TimeWinder)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/53 "2014-07-18T23:12:56Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > So the question is, would you rape someone to save the world? I would not. You have to go pretty far afield for me to say “well, rape is the best option,” but I think this achieves it. As written, I have the option of non-consensual rape (non-consensual on either side) or non-consensual genocide. Frankly, I don’t consider a person forced to rape at gunpoint as the criminal, and that’s effectively what’s happening here. I don’t think there’s a simple mathematics to atrocities, but certainly seven billion murders is much worse than one rape. I’d pick the one I believed was most willing, and ideally one that was volunteering (for the same reason I’d volunteer under the reciprocal case). ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/54 "2014-07-18T23:16:32Z")
> [@TimeWinder](#): > > I’d pick the one I believed was most willing, and ideally one that was volunteering (for the same reason I’d volunteer under the reciprocal case). Yes, and thus the strangeness of the OP, which seems to imply (as the thread develops) that for some reason that is the least attractive. ---
**Author:** ![Kenm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bc79bd/32.png) [@Kenm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kenm)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/55 "2014-07-18T23:22:52Z")
I wouldn’t believe the sadistic, mad alien in the first place because there’s no room for two Yawehs. ---
**Author:** ![SenorBeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senorbeef/32/2220_2.png) [@SenorBeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SenorBeef)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/56 "2014-07-18T23:23:41Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > Since the chooser knows virtually nothing about the three people., the chooser has to make assumptions. The safest bet is that the hottie doesn’t want to have sex with you, the other two are more of an unknown variable. Are you working under the assumption that ugly people are more attracted to other ugly people? Because they’re not. There’s some individual variation in the ideal of beauty and what they seek, but everyone is more or less the same. The vast majority of people want young, fit, attractive partners. Just because you’re ugly or fat or have a conjoined fetus growing out of the side of your face doesn’t mean you want to bang other ugly or fat or conjoined fetus people. So there’s a good chance all three women are basically going to find you the same level of attractive or repulsive. The less attractive ones are probably more used to the idea of settling for less than their ideal, but that doesn’t mean it’s less traumatic for them or more appealing to them to be put into this situation. Anyway, pick the ugly one. If anyone has to suffer, it clearly should be the ugly. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/57 "2014-07-18T23:29:38Z")
> [@Procrustus](#): > > Yes, and thus the strangeness of the OP, which seems to imply (as the thread develops) that for some reason that is the least attractive. Right, generally speaking, the less attractive someone is the less critical they are of other people’s physical attributes. /Broadbrush ---
**Author:** ![njtt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecd19e/32.png) [@njtt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njtt)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2014, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/58 "2014-07-18T23:46:40Z")
Why are these aliens so kinky? ---
**Author:** ![polar\_bear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ec9cab/32.png) [@polar\_bear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/polar_bear)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2014, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/59 "2014-07-19T00:00:36Z")
Assuming the hot one turns you on the most, you’re probably also more likely to finish quicker. So the only moral choice is the hot… if only to minimize the ‘rape’. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2014, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467/60 "2014-07-19T00:11:12Z")
> [@njtt](#): > > Why are these aliens so kinky? Well, they do usually perform anal probing after all. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-get-laid-and-save-the-world/693467.md?page=4)