# Hypothetical Road Trip: A Very Old Man vs. A Stupid Person Who Thinks They're Smart **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 14, 2011, 12:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000 "2011-07-14T12:41:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Tom\_Scud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Tom\_Scud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Scud)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2011, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/21 "2011-07-14T16:09:13Z")
> [@rachelellogram](#): > > Old people tend to smell like pee or vitamins or emit other undesirable odors, and that’s more important in close quarters than an assault on my ears. I’d pick the younger one. He’s doused in Axe. ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/22 "2011-07-15T03:39:46Z")
> [@Tom\_Scud](#): > > He’s doused in Axe. Still better than vitamins and pee. Unless it’s Axe for sick cats :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/23 "2011-07-15T04:05:08Z")
The old man, because he’ll die soon, and I can leave him by the side of the road. ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/24 "2011-07-15T04:46:01Z")
Knowing someone who does both at various times, the meandering story is infinitely less annoying. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/25 "2011-07-15T04:54:06Z")
I’d go with the stupid guy. I’d just listen and indulge him when necessary with the right questions and compliments to keep the conversations flowing and rational. ---
**Author:** ![Civil\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d78d45/32.png) [@Civil\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Civil_Guy)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/26 "2011-07-15T05:10:33Z")
Sure, go with the better driver. The rules seem to say that drugging your travel mate into stupefaction is disallowed, but I see no prohibition about self-administered drugs. Once I explain my situation to a psychiatrist, I should be able to get a legitimate prescription for some good stuff that should work. Anyhow, desperate times call for yada, yada. ---
**Author:** ![Kolga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e56c9b/32.png) [@Kolga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kolga)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/27 "2011-07-15T06:48:19Z")
The old man. Stupid people who are convinced they know everything drive me bugfuck. ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/28 "2011-07-15T07:15:03Z")
**Very Old Man** , because his rants would be pure amusement value without the kind of stressful defensive posturing that would make me want to beat the crap out of the moron. With the **VOM** , anything he says can be laughed off because he is, as per hypothesis, missing a few of his marbles and therefore stuck with ideas from whenever he last bothered to form new ideas; this likely means he’d be an 80-year-old with the ideas of a man in the 1950s or, if you’re somewhat luckier, later 1960s. In short, about as racist and sexist as an old movie or Heinlein juvie, but unconsciously so and therefore rather amiable about it. With the **Young Idiot** , anything he says is going to be self-consciously ‘different’ and ‘challenging’ and so swaddled in a protective wad of defensiveness it’s going to be absolutely insufferable. He’s going to have ideas about the Race Question, the Poverty Question, the War Question, and so on, and so forth, and he’s only going to be informed on them to the extent of knowing he’s Against, with a capital A, whatever nonsense he’s half-heard from TV or gathered from some bunch of morons online. Since he expects you to disagree with him, and try to knock down the golden god you see before you, his entire attitude will be intense and confrontational. That makes anything sound bad. So, yeah, stick me with Abe Simpson and I’ll be happy to listen to verbal static for nine or so hours a day while I watch the country go by. ---
**Author:** ![Johanna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johanna/32/8318_2.png) [@Johanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johanna)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 11:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/29 "2011-07-15T11:56:05Z")
This thread is starting to remind me strongly of Patty Griffin’s song “Stay on the Ride”: And the old man says, “That’s okay, I’ll stand I might look like a little old man to you But I’ve been riding this bus for years and years and years I don’t even know where it’s going to” And the driver says, “You don’t know where this bus is going to?” Old man says, “No, I don’t, do you?” Driver says, “You don’t know where this bus is going to?” Old man says, "I just want it to get me through Hey, I’m staying on the ride, it’s gonna take me somewhere… ---
**Author:** ![EvilTOJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee59a6/32.png) [@EvilTOJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EvilTOJ)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/30 "2011-07-15T13:13:59Z")
I’ll take Abe Simpson over a Ron any day. At least the old man will sleep more often. ---
**Author:** ![Double\_Foolscap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/85e7bf/32.png) [@Double\_Foolscap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Double_Foolscap)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/31 "2011-07-15T15:37:30Z")
The internet has vaccinated me against stupid people who think they’re smart, and I can while away the time humouring them or one-upping their bullshit with more bullshit. ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/32 "2011-07-15T16:11:31Z")
The Old Man, for sure. He may be a bore, but I could conceivably be amused or at least tune him out with the occasional “uh-huh.” The other guy actually expects/demands that you give him your attention and address his stupid points. Even humoring him by agreeing won’t stop him from saying more things that make you want to throttle him. ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/33 "2011-07-15T17:15:28Z")
> [@Moonlitherial](#): > > I’m going to go with the old man because I can more easily tune him out without annoying him. The occasional nod and he’ll continue talking, but **the stupid/smart guy is going to expect you to acknowledge his genius**. A _very_ good point. It’s hard for me to argue with this logic. It was my intuitive answer anyway. Rambling Old Man Talk is at least occasionally entertaining (a la Grandpa Simpson) and tune-outable in any case with a minimum of grunting and nodding, but a Guy Who Thinks He’s Smart And Yaks At Length would drive me guano-mad. ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/34 "2011-07-15T17:25:20Z")
In fact if the guy were actually as wild as Grandpa Abe Simpson, I’d probably get quite a kick out of it. \* In 1957 I saw him turn turn the Secretary of Agriculture into the Secretary of the Interior. It was hell on their wives, but it sure brought down corn prices! I built a house out of corn. It was the worst home I ever owned - when it got really hot it smelled like Fritos.\* _I came close to winning a gold medal at the 1936 Olympics! I threw a javelin that barely missed Hitler. But I did hit an assassin who was trying to kill Hitler… The next time I saw Hitler, we had dinner and laughed about it._ ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/35 "2011-07-15T18:11:02Z")
The old man, definitely. His stories are likely to be amusing on some level, and he’ll think I’m a peach just for being polite and listening to him. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/36 "2011-07-15T19:50:27Z")
> [@alice\_in\_wonderland](#): > > The old fella - he will probably nap for at least a portion of the trip, and occasionally he may say something interesting. > > Stupid guy would land me in jail after I beat him to death on the side of the road. Same here. The stupid person who thinks he’s insightful would drive me up the wall faster than any other form of non-reptilian life. I could humor the old guy, nod at regular intervals, and tune him out every now and then. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/37 "2011-07-15T20:47:51Z")
Old guy. Even though he is senile and rambles, it should be possible to pick out interesting historical trivia from his monologue. And there is always the refuge that is iPod when I need a break. ---
**Author:** ![lavenderviolet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cdc98d/32.png) [@lavenderviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lavenderviolet)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/38 "2011-07-15T21:20:43Z")
Easy choice: The Old Man. I like talking to old folks. Even when there is no point to what they’re saying, they’re harmless. I could definitely humor the oldster. Stupid people that think they’re smart are one of my pet peeves. No way I could humor that one. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/39 "2011-07-15T21:48:30Z")
As much as I detest old people–Gimme the old man. I kinda like shaggy dog stories. And if you’re really good you can get dottards to ramble in a direction that’s reasonably interesting just by asking them questions about what they’ve just said. Stupid people who don’t know they’re stupid make me despair. ---
**Author:** ![PandaBear77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@PandaBear77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PandaBear77)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2011, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000/40 "2011-07-16T00:38:38Z")
The old man. I love old people. And even if he’s semi-senile I figure he’s bound to say something smart or insightful eventually while he’s rambling. Meanwhile I’m guaranteed not to learn anything from Dippy McDumbass. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-road-trip-a-very-old-man-vs-a-stupid-person-who-thinks-theyre-smart/589000.md?page=3)