# Hypothetical Suicide **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 3, 2008, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848 "2008-11-03T11:23:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![EpicNonsense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c37758/32.png) [@EpicNonsense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EpicNonsense)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2008, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848/41 "2008-11-04T15:43:52Z")
> [@KneadToKnow](#): > > “the time has come for you to die, choose how” This one. ---
**Author:** ![jackdavinci](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackdavinci/32/3259_2.png) [@jackdavinci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackdavinci)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2008, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848/42 "2008-11-04T17:21:56Z")
I’d like to die of the comfort of having lived a full life, and the ascend like Daniel Jackson. ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2008, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848/43 "2008-11-04T17:36:34Z")
> [@EpicNonsense](#): > > This one. Like I said, that’s fine. I choose to die via the Killing Curse. Because I figure if God has to wait three seconds before he can actually kill me, he might as well be saying something during that time. ---
**Author:** ![Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunshine_and_Smiles)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2008, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848/44 "2008-11-05T07:36:33Z")
I’d ask to look upon God in all his glory, which hopefully would entail some Scanners-style theatrics. Or, an overdose of morphine to stop my heart, and hopefully the sensation of having a body just prior. ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2008, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848/45 "2008-11-05T12:09:34Z")
> [@KneadToKnow](#): > > Like I said, that’s fine. I choose to die via the Killing Curse. > > Because I figure if God has to wait three seconds before he can actually kill me, he might as well be saying something during that time. **Avada Kedavera!** ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2008, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848/46 "2008-11-05T19:51:52Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > say “Sorry, not my God” and walk on by. So you’ve chosen ‘beaten to death by God’? I’d say “make me 300 feet tall”. Once my rampage starts, I’m sure I’d be killed in short order by the military. ---
**Author:** ![EpicNonsense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c37758/32.png) [@EpicNonsense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EpicNonsense)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2008, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848/47 "2008-11-05T20:01:24Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > So you’ve chosen ‘beaten to death by God’? > > I’d say “make me 300 feet tall”. Once my rampage starts, I’m sure I’d be killed in short order by the military. Kong Smith!. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Euryphaessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Euryphaessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euryphaessa)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2008, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848/48 "2008-11-05T20:24:26Z")
Extreme sexual exhaustion. ---
**Author:** ![Mahna\_Mahna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47c2d/32.png) [@Mahna\_Mahna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahna_Mahna)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2008, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848/49 "2008-11-05T22:18:46Z")
> [@An\_Arky](#): > > I’d be pissed, and I’d say “Hey dickhead, if you’re so all powerful, you should already know this, so you just go ahead and make it happen your own damn self; don’t ask me for $hit”. So what you’re saying is that your preferred method of suicide is deic smiting, yes? Because from what I remember of the Bible, that’s usually what the big guy tends to do when you sass him like that. My vote would be a massive cerebral embolism. Nice and quick. ---
**Author:** ![cornflakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9d8465/32.png) [@cornflakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cornflakes)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2008, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848/50 "2008-11-06T03:56:23Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > say “Sorry, not my God” and walk on by. Hee Hee… I know that it sounds trite, but let me die peacefully while somehow helping others. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Some\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ad7895/32.png) [@Just\_Some\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Some_Guy)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2008, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848/51 "2008-11-06T13:53:11Z")
I’ll take a gamma ray burst coming out of the depths of the cosmos. Not only am I taking all of you with me, I’m taking a good chunk of the life in the galaxy with me as well. (You psuedo-bacterium under the frozen crust of the gas giant orbiting Vega know what you did…) ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2008, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848/52 "2008-11-07T00:44:25Z")
Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man!!! ---
**Author:** ![jtsPimp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@jtsPimp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtsPimp)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2008, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848/53 "2008-11-07T01:47:44Z")
Hi God, Aren’t you a contradiction of causality? We’ll talk about that during the judgement process I suppose… Anyways, take me to 30,000ft and lemme go vertical the whole way down! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-suicide/470848.md?page=2)