# Hypothetical: World Leader Slaps the Sh\*t out of Vladimir Putin at G-20 Summit. What Happens Next? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 26, 2023, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648 "2023-05-26T23:21:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Caribbean\_cruiser](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/caribbean_cruiser/32/9349_2.png) [@Caribbean\_cruiser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caribbean_cruiser)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2023, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/1 "2023-05-26T23:21:51Z")
Media sources a few months ago said Vlad skipped a key G20 summit amid a swirl of rumors that another world leader was planning to humiliate him with a monstrous slap to the face in front of flashing cameras. Who knows if these stories are true, but it does make me wonder: What might have happened next – **after** a crush of NFL-sized Russian bodyguards gave the slapper a world-class smackdown? Has anything like this happened in recent times? It’s hard to imagine Putin lodging a strongly worded verbal protest and leaving it at that. Do you see him ordering an agent to go after the slapper with a poison? Putin is all about projecting strength and machismo (and trading on his cult of personality), so it’s hard to imagine a scenario where he doesn’t go totally Billy Jack on the offending leader and his country. ---
**Author:** ![Babale](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/babale/32/15666_2.png) [@Babale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Babale)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2023, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/2 "2023-05-27T00:25:18Z")
Seems to me like this would start a war. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2023, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/3 "2023-05-27T01:28:42Z")
A war is already going on. I don’t think Russia has the focus to fight two of them. ---
**Author:** ![Measure\_for\_Measure](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/measure_for_measure/32/557_2.png) [@Measure\_for\_Measure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Measure_for_Measure)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2023, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/4 "2023-05-27T04:21:31Z")
**It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog** Putin is an accomplished judoka, so it might be an interesting fight. Which world leader would deliver the blow? [https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/2022/02/27/international-judo-federation-suspends-putin/](https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/2022/02/27/international-judo-federation-suspends-putin/) ETA: The source of this story is the Daily Mail, who got it from a Telegram channel, “which has regularly claimed that Putin is suffering from cancer, Parkinson’s disease and a schizoaffective disorder.” This sounds to me like a psy-op, but the OP’s question still works as a hypothetical. [MSN](https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/world/vladimir-putin-could-skip-g20-summit-over-fears-another-foreign-leader-intends-to-slap-him/ar-AA13TkNr) ---
**Author:** ![Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/q.q.switcheroo/32/5713_2.png) [@Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.Q.Switcheroo)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2023, 10:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/5 "2023-05-27T10:52:13Z")
Checks out! [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/kcbglml9KRo/hqdefault.jpg "Shaking hands") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kcbglml9KRo) ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2023, 12:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/6 "2023-05-27T12:16:05Z")
World leaders know Russia has nuclear weapons. Some hypotheticals are too much so. ---
**Author:** ![Caribbean\_cruiser](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/caribbean_cruiser/32/9349_2.png) [@Caribbean\_cruiser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caribbean_cruiser)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2023, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/7 "2023-05-27T19:28:04Z")
The only G20 members I can imagine this being are (a) Emmanuel Macron, who himself was slapped by a fellow French citizen in mid-2021 during a campaign stop, and is hard to predict, or (b) Turkey’s Erdogan, who redefines erratic, yet is probably not suicidal. I think Putin’s reaction would be best described as volcanic. He would have gone completely, stark-raving unhinged. Regarding Putin as The Great Judoka, yes we’ve all read those press releases. I imagine Putin’s judo opponents have long known the perils of fighting back. It’s like the venerable, half-blind, 87-year-old Aikido master who easily throws 3 burly attackers during a media demonstration. ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2023, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/8 "2023-05-27T19:45:36Z")
> [@Caribbean\_cruiser](#): > > Regarding Putin as The Great Judoka, yes we’ve all read those press releases. I imagine Putin’s judo opponents have long known the perils of fighting back. It’s like the venerable, half-blind, 87-year-old Aikido master who easily throws 3 burly attackers during a media demonstration. Steven Segal is 87? ---
**Author:** ![snowthx](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowthx/32/10660_2.png) [@snowthx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snowthx)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2023, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/9 "2023-05-28T00:35:42Z")
> [@Caribbean\_cruiser](#): > > I think Putin’s reaction would be best described as volcanic. He would have gone completely, stark-raving unhinged Yeah, I can’t see Putin going all Chris Rock. He seems calm and under control, but just under the surface I bet he’s wound up tight. I am sure he’d lose his shit if someone slapped him at a public event, or in any way made him look weak. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2023, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/10 "2023-05-28T14:38:01Z")
> [@snowthx](#): > > I am sure he’d lose his shit if someone slapped him at a public event, or in any way made him look weak. At an estimated 5’7", I think Putin has Short Mans Syndrome. Makes for a dangerous situation considering the power he has at his disposal. More so now that he is finding out that his military is somewhat less capable than he probably thought it was. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2023, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/11 "2023-05-28T14:50:13Z")
> [@Odesio](#): > > > [@Caribbean\_cruiser](#): > > > > Regarding Putin as The Great Judoka, yes we’ve all read those press releases. I imagine Putin’s judo opponents have long known the perils of fighting back. It’s like the venerable, half-blind, 87-year-old Aikido master who easily throws 3 burly attackers during a media demonstration. > > Steven Segal is 87? - Steven Segal is an Aikido master? ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2023, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/12 "2023-05-28T17:13:38Z")
I don’t think Putin fears being humiliated by a slap; he could just hit back. What would be humiliating is every other world leader deliberately ignoring him. ---
**Author:** ![mbh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@mbh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mbh)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2023, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/13 "2023-05-28T18:25:24Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > Steven Segal is an Aikido master? 7th _Dan_ (7th degree black belt), conferred by the [Aikikai](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aikikai) school. Pro: For a foreigner to earn a high degree from a Japanese school is a legitimately impressive feat. Con: His dojo was owned and operated by his father-in-law. By the way, a black belt does not mean that you are a bad-ass killing machine. It means you are qualified to teach. A higher degree black belt means you are qualified to run a larger school. Most instructors are 1st or 2nd degree. The head of a local school is often 3rd to 5th Dan. The head of a regional organization will be 5th to 7th degree. The head of a national organization is 9th Dan. A few organizations confer a 10th degree, but 10th Dan is usually an honorary “lifetime achievement” award that they give you after you retire. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2023, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hypothetical-world-leader-slaps-the-sh-t-out-of-vladimir-putin-at-g-20-summit-what-happens-next/984648/14 "2023-05-28T20:06:17Z")
I don’t know if you follow the news. There has been talk of detaining Putin if he appears in certain nations. One is cautious with countries that have nuclear weapons, and South Africa in particular will be very reluctant to do so (and will not) should he appear there as planned. Given this, a hypothetical question becomes much more so, as it is hard to see where it could happen.