Hypothetically, what would happen if a cat ate some pot?

Factual Questions
41

Once, back in my hypothetical youth, I imagined I used to toss random seeds off the back porch at my folks house into the make believe backyard. I also used to take my imagnary cat out on to the porch for sun, brushing, etc…

One day, someone might might hypothesize that while in the backyard with the cat, that I (or someone a lot like me) noticed certain familiar looking shoots coming out of the ground.

I (or my doppelganger) would grab said shoots and toss them to some pretend cat on the porch who would devour them like that cat grass they sell in cat stores.

It might have, had this been a true tale, gotten to the point where said feline would wait for me (or someone) each day to take him to the porch where he’s look out over the edge of the porch and wait for some more imaginary little reefer shoots to nibble on. The cat, being a allegorical cat, would niot be fooled by grass (snicker) or other greenish plants, only being satisfied with the genuine article.

42

I’ve got a story that probably doesn’t paint me in the best light, but whatever.

About 15 years ago, I retired for the evening, leaving a gram or 2 of weed on a living room table. It was wrapped in foil.

I awoke early and began getting ready for work. My morning routine took me into the living room, where I saw an open package of foil and some crumblies of dope sitting on said table.

Perplexed, I was. My roommate and I were known to share resources from time to time, but for her to take my entire stash was quite a breach of protocol. I continued the task of getting ready for work with a kind of annoyed demeanor.

And then I saw the dog.

My roommate’s dog was a mutt in every sense of the word. He was old. About 15 years. He was arthritic. He was ugly. He stunk. He sneezed lots. Oddly, he smashed his nose into the floor when he sneezed. But I digress.

He was dead.

I am not a morning person. I’d been awake for all of about 5 minutes. My head was still full of morning cobwebs. It took me a few seconds to put the whole story together.

I’ve just woken to discover my buds are gone, leaving me somewhat pissed off. And now I’ve just discovered that my roommate’s beloved dog (whom I’m at best ambivalent about) has committed self euthanasia. By eating my ganja.

My roommate is still asleep.

What would you do?

I went to work. It was 7:30

I handled a lot of phone calls at that job. I knew I was going to get a call from the roommate eventually.

Eventually came at about 10:30.

She was distraught. Her dog had died. Sob. It looked like he got into some dope on the table. And died.

I’d had enough time to rehearse that I was genuinely shocked. No! Oh, I’m so sorry. Is there anything I can do for you?

So I left work, went home and we sat and looked at the dog for a while. He looked like he was at peace. Perhaps a bit of an anthropomorphic smile on his face.

She talked about his life. How he was such a good dog. What he was like as a puppy.

I apologized for leaving the dope on the table. We talked about how he was getting old and feeble. And that his time was just around the corner. And that this probably wasn’t such a bad way to go.

And then we took him for cremation.

So is there a moral to the story? Besides don’t leave your dope where the animals can get to it, I don’t know. As it relates to the OP, no not really. This old dog was just a sneeze or two away from going to the farm, so I don’t think that this anecdote means anything vis a vis small quantities of dope being dangerous to pets.

Fifteen years later, and I still don’t know if I did the right thing by leaving for work instead of waking her up and telling her.

umm - hypothetically

43

Okay, now I am starting to doubt whether any of you are real. :eek:

44

Shit, she’s on to us! Quick, somebody turn off the dream machine before she crashes through the matrix! She’s in the walls!

45

There’s always the slight possibility it was a coincidence. Too bad you’ll never really know… hypo-- aww, screw it.

46

Hypothetically, it’s cheaper and easier to administer a shottie or three than a sedative tablet when attempting a long distance drive with a cat loose in the car.

Doesn’t improve driving ability and the resulting delays, due to driving in second gear for 57 kilometres, mean repeat doses may be required.

Or so I heard.

47

Read the story of someone who was playing fetch with his date’s dog while she was getting ready. The ball went out the 10th story window with the dog right after it. He resolved the question by mentioning over dinner that her dog seemed depressed.

48

I’ve always thought you were sort of my Dope Doppelganger (Dopelganger?) (D-Opal-ganger?) I think we’re even the same age.