# I (allegedly) Write Like... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 15, 2010, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828 "2010-07-15T20:18:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2010, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/21 "2010-07-15T23:31:14Z")
> [@Wisthekiller](#): > > Apparently the words to Anarchy in the UK (I don’t write at all, so I have nothing to contribute) come up with some Will Gibson, some guy that writes science fiction. I smell reality. Hey…this gives me an idea. Okay, I just fed it the first three pages of “Home Delievery” by Stephen King. Apparently \*he \*writes like Chuck Palahniuk. Hmmm ---
**Author:** ![Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/bc8723/32.png) [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unauthorized_Cinnamon)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2010, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/22 "2010-07-15T23:55:38Z")
David Foster Wallace for most of my blog,\* and even when I put in the text of my infamous letter to the gym. I think it’s the site’s default setting or something. Also got it for my naturally-worded posts here. For my poison ivy play, I got James Fenimore Cooper. \*With two Dan Browns, a Stephenie Meyer, and a James Joyce - how does that happen? [The text of this post got a Stephenie Meyer] ---
**Author:** ![Elysium](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3be4f8/32.png) [@Elysium](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elysium)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/23 "2010-07-16T00:00:47Z")
I got J.K Rowling, then Stephanie Meyer (ugh), and also William Shakespeare (?!). One of these things is not like the other. ---
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/24 "2010-07-16T00:13:54Z")
Random words from a list of words will get James Joyce. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/25 "2010-07-16T00:24:55Z")
Trying this from facebook earlier and entering the first, second, and third parts of the same story it told me I wrote like 1st- Chuck Palahniuk 2nd- Stephen King 3rd- Ray Bradbury ---
**Author:** ![Arnold\_Winkelried](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/26 "2010-07-16T00:40:31Z")
I went to the Gutenberg project, copied out the whole text of _A Christmas Carol_ by Charles Dickens (Marley’s ghost, Tiny Tim, Scrooge et al.) and pasted that in. The website told me that Charles Dickens writes like … . . . . . . . . . wait for it … . . . . . . . . [SIZE=“3”]Stephen King!!![/SIZE] ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/27 "2010-07-16T00:44:51Z")
> [@Arnold\_Winkelried](#): > > I went to the Gutenberg project, copied out the whole text of _A Christmas Carol_ by Charles Dickens (Marley’s ghost, Tiny Tim, Scrooge et al.) and pasted that in. > > The website told me that Charles Dickens writes like … > .. > wait for it … > . > .[SIZE=“3”]Stephen King!!![/SIZE] Marley was dead: to begin with. There is no doubt whatever about that. And sometimes dead is bettah! ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/28 "2010-07-16T00:59:34Z")
I plugged in one of my Christmas letters. It said I wrote like Harry Harrison. Using my posts from the [Straight Dope Horror Movie Game II: The Return](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=566974) thread, it said I wrote like David Foster Wallace, Raymond Chandler, William Gibson, and finally like Stephan King. ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/29 "2010-07-16T01:16:23Z")
What’s with all these people who have never heard of David Foster Wallace? ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f07891/32.png) [@Little\_Plastic\_Ninja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Plastic_Ninja)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/30 "2010-07-16T01:21:08Z")
I got some David Foster Wallace. My academic papers apparently sound like James Joyce. I am not altogether certain this is a compliment. 😛 The first chapter of my modern somewhat gothic fantasy reads like Neil Gaiman. Good, that’s what I was going for! The high-ish fantasy short story I wrote is, apparently, reminiscent of Leguin. It definitely seems to catch on to what genre I’m writing. And when I’m writing horror, I write like Stephen King or Dan Brown depending on the page I paste in. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/31 "2010-07-16T01:23:32Z")
First entry, OP of the whole “Not Coming To A Theater Near You” sillyfest, I’m Neil Gaimen. I feel flattered. Second OP, about cooking lasagna… _Stephanie Meyers_. Stephanie Freakin’ Sparklepire Meyers! That’s it, **I Write Like** , I’m not your friend anymore! ---
**Author:** ![Superhal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Superhal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superhal)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/32 "2010-07-16T01:49:46Z")
I pasted in my responses from the “The really REALLY bad advice thread”: Chuck Palahniuk My response from “What odd things did you grow up with that you thought were perfectly normal?” thread: James Joyce A short story I wrote: David Foster Wallace Imho, this is just some sort of scam to get you to use their service. ---
**Author:** ![Nametag](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nametag/32/406_2.png) [@Nametag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nametag)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/33 "2010-07-16T01:55:22Z")
The longest and most legitimately me-ish chunk of writing I submitted returned with the claim that I write like James Joyce. Another was judged to be in the vein of Arthur C. Clarke. Another, Dan Brown (Pfui!). Two others, David Foster Wallace. No. I don’t think so. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/34 "2010-07-16T02:01:49Z")
First (the story I’m currently working on) – James Joyce Second (the story that got a mention in Year’s Best SF) – H.P. Lovecraft Third (my most recent sale) – David Foster Wallace Fourth (a sale to Realms of Fantasy) – Chuck Palahniuk ---
**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/35 "2010-07-16T02:05:13Z")
I got James Joyce, Ian Fleming, Arthur C. Clarke, George Orwell, JK Rowling, and David Foster Wallace. I think the site is most likely crap. ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/36 "2010-07-16T02:23:56Z")
> [@Antigen](#): > > I think the site is most likely crap. Of course it is. It’s a load of nonsense intended to entice you to sign up for their newletter, and possibly to buy junk. That’s why it’s fun to abuse it so. Having not yet hit the apparently inevitable “David Foster Wallace”, I put in the origin stories of some of my MMO superhero characters. The magic twins sharing a body and the agoraphobic psychic bubble baby were labeled LeGuin. The guy with the knives, whose background is all dialog, got Vonnegutted. The extradimensional knight from a world where the sun never set on the British Empire was associated with Joyce. And finally, on my gross, lightning-struck, urban-legend supervillain, I got David Foster Wallace. Can I join the club now? 😃 Just to be meta, I put in my OP. Apparently, it reads like Stephen King. WTF? And for the final recursion, I pasted the site’s own instructions into the blank. Guess who the site’s author writes like? You got it. David Foster Wallace. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![GilaB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8e7dd6/32.png) [@GilaB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GilaB)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/37 "2010-07-16T02:29:54Z")
I got James Joyce with a fairly philosophical personal email, and William Gibson with a newsier travelogue meant for more general consumption. My [most recent lengthy post](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=12690049&postcount=52) got me the inevitable David Foster Wallace. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/38 "2010-07-16T03:20:50Z")
I wonder if there’s any method to the assignments at all, or it it’s an arbitrary algorithm that’s only use is to flog their “Get Published” book. ---
**Author:** ![GilaB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8e7dd6/32.png) [@GilaB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GilaB)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/39 "2010-07-16T03:38:36Z")
If it’s arbitrary, it at least remembers what it said to you earlier, because giving it the same samples now gave me the same answers as an hour ago. ---
**Author:** ![rjk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed655f/32.png) [@rjk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjk)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2010, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828/40 "2010-07-16T04:36:13Z")
I put in a few paragraphs in a sort-of hardboiled style and got Stephen King. I would have preferred Raymond Chandler, but OK. > [@](#): > > I knew she was dead even before I walked down the alley for a closer look. Janie was a teen-age whore, but neither a junkie nor a drunk, and didn’t spend her time in alleys. > > She was cut up bad. I remember thinking “Jack the Ripper!” as I turned away to puke, and thought it again as I went back to see more. Her clothes were mostly in place, except for the slashes over her belly and chest, so it didn’t seem to be rape, and her purse was closed beside her, so probably not robbery. That left a psycho, or something personal. Maybe both. > > By then I was feeling shaky and really craving a good stiff drink, so I went into the bar around the corner and asked for a coffee and the phone. The bartender wasn’t too happy about either, but I gave him that hard-cop look and he moved quick. I punched 911, asked for the cops and the meat wagon, and took my mug of coffee outside to wait by the entrance to the alley. > > Luckily, the first cop to arrive was one I knew from before, so I told him to let the detectives deal with it, and he didn’t go far enough to see too much. Pretty soon everybody else showed up for the usual crime-scene circus. Two detectives came into the bar with me to return the mug and then took me to Headquarters for an hour or two of questions. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-allegedly-write-like/546828.md?page=3)