# I am 21, and I think I am drunk. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 27, 2002, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063 "2002-07-27T03:43:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Muad\_Dib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/35a633/32.png) [@Muad\_Dib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muad_Dib)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/1 "2002-07-27T03:43:01Z")
I just turned 21 Holy fuck htat mousew moves fast. No kiding. That seems to be the weird thing, that I can’t really track what is going fast. That is fard. I also hamade it a ppoit tio not corect the soelling errors. I wswer toGod that therse are real. Tihis is not a jopke. I just drank three long ixland iced teas, I theink four soobey scnacks and a wlaabey somthings and a three wise men. I am sauced. BUT THE MINGD is UNAFESCTED!!! It is the body! The body is weak! i dfeel warm and tingly. ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/2 "2002-07-27T03:50:11Z")
LOL!!! Kids these days… 🙂 Of course, I’m 21 too, but I had the sense to start drinking at 15, when spelling errors could be excused much more readily 😃 Happy birthday, **Muad’Dib** , and remember: “Everything in moderation, even sobriety” ---
**Author:** ![Muad\_Dib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/35a633/32.png) [@Muad\_Dib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muad_Dib)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/3 "2002-07-27T03:52:47Z")
Aww fuck. I think that I am brunck. God damnit\> I sweared that thins would not mappen. They will never fbelievie me thought. They wiill say that I was drunk. Tey will say the at I dis this on purpse! TENY FU|VCING LIE!!! Ok, some of it is drunkenness! I am having torubbel with the ketybourd. DGOD Damnit~!!! I sore to myself that I would not be Affected! That I would be strong where others were eweak. God forive me buyt I think I have failed. I vcan only hope that this will provide gfor much humor in futore genertations~! You will not believe me. you ei;; say that this is just intentjonal typos like JEFFK ofr somthing. VUTT no! It is real!! I just gort bavck for a reatstuarant!! I am quit the drunkatrd knoon . HOlky shit!! I would not believe this!! I am going to be so embaressed in the morning. I swear that this isn ot a joke. Really. Like you hsould care. Whay the hell should you care?\> My fingers are a little nubm. ---
**Author:** ![Muad\_Dib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/35a633/32.png) [@Muad\_Dib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muad_Dib)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/4 "2002-07-27T03:54:47Z")
I ffeell tingly, and gevery thing is just a little bulurry. This is not as mucrgh fun as they made it out to be. I think I threw up a bit ago. I so not nknow. * * * ---
**Author:** ![Muad\_Dib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/35a633/32.png) [@Muad\_Dib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muad_Dib)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/5 "2002-07-27T04:06:47Z")
okay, I move y head quickly, from the left to the right and ist is ams if nothing has happend in be tween. Where the fuck sid that spae come from… MYY MIND IS UN AFFEXCTED!! only mi dobdy is tingly ly I feel numb and tinlgly.’ OI cobpy this for my self and for science. I am a physics major. that means that I am expcected to do this stuff. I would thingk that i am lying bu I SWEATR I am not!!! Really !! I am drungjk gfor the first time!!! theis is not as fun as what is ihis noame, that guy ano the andy griffith show made out!. ---
**Author:** ![Muad\_Dib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/35a633/32.png) [@Muad\_Dib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muad_Dib)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/6 "2002-07-27T04:12:46Z")
HOly shit juedi knight is fastr!!! ---
**Author:** ![Muad\_Dib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/35a633/32.png) [@Muad\_Dib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muad_Dib)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/7 "2002-07-27T04:17:21Z")
I fell like onw tath navacaine has been shot shot through my veins . I am giong to dee men in black wtwo. I am sorry. TGhis really is not a joke. I am so emabarresed. ithought tath I would be fiferent taht I wluld not be affected. God damnit i fell noumbe. I am sory. ---
**Author:** ![galen\_ubal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/galen_ubal/32/4440_2.png) [@galen\_ubal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/galen_ubal)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/8 "2002-07-27T04:17:58Z")
Ahh, memories. My first drunk, shots of whiskey while playing quarters. One of the dumbest things I ever did in my life, and I _still_ can’t stand beer. I’m lucky I didn’t drown…in a particularly nasty way… Remember, **Muad’Dib** , drink lots of water, and make sure not to pass out on your back. Condolences on how you’re going to feel in the morning… ---
**Author:** ![Muad\_Dib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/35a633/32.png) [@Muad\_Dib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muad_Dib)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/9 "2002-07-27T04:18:38Z")
Everything is so fucking FZAST!!! If the wrold would just slow down ( and itf I wold just learn to read as I tyoe!! :))) I wo uld be OK! ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/10 "2002-07-27T04:19:45Z")
Someone let him know tomorrow that he started a thread. 😉 Congrats, **Dib**. Hope you feel OK in the near future. ---
**Author:** ![Muad\_Dib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/35a633/32.png) [@Muad\_Dib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muad_Dib)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/11 "2002-07-27T04:21:53Z")
WHat the hell!@ gALEN!! i FELL FINE nOw! whAT M,AK3EDS YOU THINK i WILL FEEL WRONG TOWMARROWW! I hit caps loack. Tha t its not a lie I am sorry. I really am… I do not want tyou wito tnhink that iI am lying like the mushroom kid. OH GOD IT IS LIKE NOVACAINE!!! throughout mny bodky. WEH IT is this so hard? i thought that I would be fdifferent. Id on not mean to be silly I really odnonet/. dont. DO not! God nbdamn it. you will not belienve me. I am sorry. I really am. Please. I am not lying. I am sorry. ---
**Author:** ![Muad\_Dib](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/35a633/32.png) [@Muad\_Dib](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muad_Dib)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/12 "2002-07-27T04:41:05Z")
I do not understand. This seems remarkable that I might not remember this!. I sm ey memtort reattlly so fragile? That is scarry iand intersecxsting. Interesting. But not really. I do not want it to bve frabigile. Oh good god this is scarry. I dont want my mindto be so broken. I do not mwant my ideas to disapear. I do not want these thigs to FADE away!? WhaT EIWLILL i BE IN DOUBT OF 9cAPS LOCK) TomarwoosW!!?. I do not know? I do not like this mvery muck HI and I do not think that i wewill dso it again. Raeall yI am not lying! do ntont awatn you to think that I am just doing this on purpoese … Itrhine thing is that I am aware ofd how weird this soundsQ! That is how I nknow that the mind is not really affected! it is just the body! It is ohly thae body that is so slopy with words because I know that ithis is weird. I know that this is funhny. I know that i I will fgrefgret this and sask taht it be fdeleated when I stort some political careaer. Oho God this is not so much fun Ias I thougt. IBut I don not feel Nautios! Ounly once! but that passed bquicly and without feeling much. ---
**Author:** ![Exgineer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Exgineer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exgineer)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/13 "2002-07-27T04:50:34Z")
Okey dokey, buddy. Close out your browser, shut down the machine, get yourself a big old bucket, and go to bed. Pound down about a quart of water, or Gatorade[sup]TM[/sup] if you have it. Lie really flat, and try to ignore the spinning room. If that fails, use the aforementioned bucket. ---
**Author:** ![galen\_ubal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/galen_ubal/32/4440_2.png) [@galen\_ubal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/galen_ubal)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/14 "2002-07-27T04:55:15Z")
**Muad’Dib** , I _really_ suggest you have someone else with you for awhile, preferably someone sober. What you’re feeling now is perfectly normal given your consumption, so there’s no need to feel freaked out. ---
**Author:** ![Dazzling\_White\_Diamonds](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/41988e/32.png) [@Dazzling\_White\_Diamonds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dazzling_White_Diamonds)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/15 "2002-07-27T04:58:48Z")
**Muad’dib** Just remember this: \*I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain. \* Just try to repeat this whilst chucking yer guts up. Guaranteed to make ya feel better. 😃 **Just joking, kiddo… remember, this too shall pass. Drink lots of water, gatorade, etc like Exgineer suggested, and try to stay still.** ---
**Author:** ![Wolfian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7ea924/32.png) [@Wolfian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolfian)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/16 "2002-07-27T05:06:56Z")
Hey, happy birthday! You are the same age as my friend and share the same birthday. She had the good sense to turn off her computer though. Ah, slurred speech, spinning rooms, sitting cross-legged on the floor, 25 or 6 to 4. I miss college (only another 2 and a half weeks :)). ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/17 "2002-07-27T05:10:36Z")
Yeah, yeah, yeah I think he’s asleep now. You never did find that bean, beef and cheese burrito did you son? ---
**Author:** ![Exgineer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Exgineer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exgineer)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/18 "2002-07-27T05:11:34Z")
We now very angry with you, young man! If you don’t have friends with you now, take it from us. Follow our advice and go to BED. Water. Gatorade. Bed. Friend to make sure you don’t choke on your own vomit. Good directions to the bathroom. Friend, again. Bed. Bed. Bed. Are you getting this yet? ---
**Author:** ![j666](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de0a6/32.png) [@j666](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/j666)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/19 "2002-07-27T05:26:53Z")
Warm water with salt and a toilet. Then: Aspirin. A pint of water. Every time you wake up to pee, another pint of water. ---
**Author:** ![TheLoadedDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@TheLoadedDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheLoadedDog)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2002, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063/20 "2002-07-27T05:37:51Z")
Dunno about the Gatorade. It’s a bit on the sweet side and might end up producing a Technicolor[sup]TM[/sup] Yawn. Water, two aspirins. Sleep. Wake up in the middle of the night to answer the call of nature. Drink more water. Sleep. Wake up in the morning. More water. Two more aspirins. As has been said, none of this paracetamol nosense. Aspirin! Sleep again if possible. Don’t resist the urge to puke. If you can stomach it, have ONE beer. If not, that’s ok. More water. If you do have the beer, then have the water too. Make the usual promises to yourself. Good luck. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-21-and-i-think-i-am-drunk/121063.md?page=2)