# I am a Communist. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 21, 2010, 9:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964 "2010-08-21T09:21:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![Commissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c68b51/32.png) [@Commissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Commissar)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/181 "2010-08-23T16:33:53Z")
> [@E-Sabbath](#): > > I think at this point, der Commissar really should explain where the hell he takes his political philosophy from, because it’s not Das Kapital. Seriously, can you explain the leading teachers of the philosophy you follow? It sure isn’t recognizable to the rest of us. As I alluded to previously, my philosophy is a little bit of everything, with my own twist. Its foundations are in Marxism, with particular emphasis on Lenin’s interpretation of _Capital_. It also draws heavily on Trotsky, and to a lesser extent on Mao. It is tempered with the revolutionary philosophies of Castro and Ho Chi Minh, and then borrows extensively from modern Chinese economic theory. Finally, it adopts the philosophical strains of utilitarianism and cultural and moral relativism. Then, a handful of my own personal modifications, and you have my philosophy in a nutshell. What I believe in includes but is not limited to the following: (1) The supremacy of socialism over capitalism. (2) A strong one party state. (3) The distribution of power throughout the party as a barrier against tyranny. (4) Recognition of all positive Eastern rights. (5) Recognition of all negative Western rights, provided that they do not interfere with the good of the people (most don’t - freedoms of religion and speech are fine with me; private gun ownership is out). (6) The use of violence only when absolutely necessary. (7) Non-aggression and non-imperialism. (8) Aiding other states in acquiring socialism. (9) Marginalization though not elimination of organized religions. (10) A centrally-planned economy WITH private businesses. ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/182 "2010-08-23T17:45:41Z")
Sooo… you actually have no philosophical backings for your statements, just some theoretical and nebulously defined principles of something you like to call communism but is really a mutated utopianism combined with fascism? ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/183 "2010-08-23T17:55:46Z")
Educated, employed and resides in America. Were you actually to turn up, back in Russia or China, espousing this nonsense, (let’s be real, it’s not really communism, it’s just a slurry of half concepts at best), you’d find yourself in the gulag or up against a wall, right quick, I suspect. I choose to believe your Mama drank too much vodka before discovering she was preggers. You’re so cute with your half baked silliness, all I can say is Viva the Revolution, Comrade! Keep up the good fight! Oh, and good luck with that! ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Excellent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f19dbf/32.png) [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/184 "2010-08-23T18:01:46Z")
[quote=“Commissar, post:104, topic:550964”] > [@BigT](#): > > You know, I am somewhat bothered by the ridiculous Western myth that you democrats have the power to “stop” your own leaders if they get too dangerous. Really? When has this ever happened? When has a representative democracy ever removed a truly dangerous leader from power? > > No, what tends to happen is one of two things: either the dangerous leader rigs the system so an render himself immune to popular checks, or he is able to surf a wave of mass hysteria and human stupidity while staying well out of the reach of his opponents. For an example of the prior, look no further than Adolf Hitler, who is after all an excellent example of the type of individual that representative democracies tend to spew forth. For an example of the latter, take a look at Little Bush, who spent his first term starting illegal wars and taking a huge steaming dump all over the US economy, only to have the cretins reelect him to a second term for more of the same. Yes, democracies can produce bad leaders, and communist authoritarian states can produce good ones. But you’re only telling part of the story - sure, eight years of Bush was bad. But where is he now? Retired, following free and fair elections that brought the opposition to power without a shot being fired - not even the single bullet you’d have prescribed for Stalin and Gorbachev. Our constitution demanded Bush’s removal from power, and he was removed. > [@Commissar](#): > > [What I believe in includes but is not limited to the following: snip Recognition of all negative Western rights, provided that they do not interfere with the good of the people (most don’t - freedoms of religion and speech are fine with me; private gun ownership is out). > (6) The use of violence only when absolutely necessary. > [snip] I’m curious - how much freedom of speech are you willing to tolerate? Say that I speak out against your ideal regime - am I to be exiled to the gulag? What if I start a pro-democracy blog? A newspaper? What happens if I organize demonstrations calling for reform? At what point do I earn a bullet to the back of my head? ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/185 "2010-08-23T18:01:54Z")
Anyone care to guess what “all positive Eastern rights.” might mean? The right to stand in line for bread? To abandon alcohol ravaged children to orphanages with conditions less inviting than the Warsaw ghetto? The right to tremble in fear for holding an opposing view? The right to disappear anyone, anytime? The right to be brutalized by a police/army, usually drunk, and indiscriminately abusive, without recourse? The right to be held hostage in your own country, denied the right to travel? ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Excellent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f19dbf/32.png) [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/186 "2010-08-23T18:07:08Z")
> [@elbows](#): > > Anyone care to guess what “all positive Eastern rights.” might mean? > > The right to stand in line for bread? > To abandon alcohol ravaged children to orphanages with conditions less inviting than the Warsaw ghetto? > The right to tremble in fear for holding an opposing view? > The right to disappear anyone, anytime? > The right to be brutalized by a police/army, usually drunk, and indiscriminately abusive, without recourse? > The right to be held hostage in your own country, denied the right to travel? In fairness to the OP, I suspect he’s referring to something like the rights espoused in the International Covenant on Economic, Social and Cultural Rights, which focuses upon rights to education/housing/social security/etc. [International Covenant on Economic, Social and Cultural Rights - Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/International_Covenant_on_Economic,_Social_and_Cultural_Rights) It attracted a lot more enthusiastic attention in the developing world than in the developed states, for the most part. ---
**Author:** ![Olentzero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/90ced4/32.png) [@Olentzero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Olentzero)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/187 "2010-08-23T18:26:27Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > Now I’ve seen everything. A capitalist telling me that I’m a bad Communist… 😉 There’s _something_ wrong with this sentence, but I can’t quite put my finger on it. Fellow Dopers? Any help here? ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/188 "2010-08-23T18:34:51Z")
In that case, just as soon as his ‘ideal’ nations get those rights in place, we can talk. ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/189 "2010-08-23T18:48:23Z")
> [@Mr.Excellent](#): > > Yes, democracies can produce bad leaders, and communist authoritarian states can produce good ones. But you’re only telling part of the story - sure, eight years of Bush was bad. But where is he now? Retired, following free and fair elections that brought the opposition to power without a shot being fired - not even the single bullet you’d have prescribed for Stalin and Gorbachev. Our constitution demanded Bush’s removal from power, and he was removed. You’re being just a tad dramatic there, aren’t you? Bush wasn’t _removed_; he was simply no longer eligible to hold office. He could have been removed in '04, but the electorate chose otherwise. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Hamster\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8edcca/32.png) [@The\_Hamster\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Hamster_King)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/190 "2010-08-23T18:52:03Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > And at no point have I claimed that my theory “is the one true way.” It is simply a way, a potentiality in a sea of other options. If you don’t believe that communism is the “one true way”, then how do you justify giving it a permanent monopoly on power through a single-party state? > [@](#): > > Stalin was a horrible administrator, one that crippled the army and the economy, made disastrous domestic policy choices, and seemed to be preoccupied with the process of murdering fellow party members rather than, you know, running the country. He was a toxin introduced into the nation’s bloodstream, and he weakened it to the point of actual collapse. And there was no way to get rid of him. The U.S.S.R. was saddled with a bloodthirsty incompetent at the helm until he dropped dead. Yet you still argue for the foolishness of single-party rule. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Hamster\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8edcca/32.png) [@The\_Hamster\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Hamster_King)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/191 "2010-08-23T18:55:59Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > The average person has neither the knowledge nor the capacity to make an informed decision concerning his nation’s governmental bodies. Such decisions must be made by the experts, not by the mobs. Then why not just let the plutocrats control everything? They at least have demonstrated that they’re competent managers, unlike the boot-lickers that rise to the top in a one-party system. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Excellent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f19dbf/32.png) [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/192 "2010-08-23T18:59:44Z")
> [@Starving\_Artist](#): > > > [@Mr.Excellent](#): > > > > Yes, democracies can produce bad leaders, and communist authoritarian states can produce good ones. But you’re only telling part of the story - sure, eight years of Bush was bad. But where is he now? Retired, following free and fair elections that brought the opposition to power without a shot being fired - not even the single bullet you’d have prescribed for Stalin and Gorbachev. Our constitution demanded Bush’s removal from power, and he was removed. > > You’re being just a tad dramatic there, aren’t you? Bush wasn’t _removed_; he was simply no longer eligible to hold office. He could have been removed in '04, but the electorate chose otherwise. No, I stand by it - the legal machinery of the democratic state removed Bush from power as surely as if he’d been taken out back and shot. The great virtue of our constitution is that it achieved this salutory result without a single drop of blood being spilled. Under the OP’s system, we’d be stuck with our bad leaders until they dropped or someone shot them. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/193 "2010-08-23T19:13:03Z")
> [@Commissar](#): > > freedoms of religion and speech are fine with me; private gun ownership is out I know what you mean. It really sucks when you’re reasonably trying to murder a couple of million enemies of the revolution and they start shooting back at you. Oh, what’s a poor Communist to do? ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/194 "2010-08-23T20:43:43Z")
> [@Comissar](#): > > We Communists are heirs to a dynamic, complex philosophy that embraces change and progress. I assume you were asleep during the entire Brezhnev era. Your answer about the relative success of Taiwan is interesting - you allege it was because other countries invested in them. OK, why is Cuba such a shit hole even though the USSR subsidized them? I would also like a little detail on why it is that whenever a country is divided into Communist and capitalist parts, the capitalist part always outperforms the commies. Sush as North vs. South Korea, and East and West Germany. Of course the North vs. South Korea is not really fair - NK started with most of the heavy industry on their side. Yet they starve. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/195 "2010-08-23T21:10:52Z")
> [@E-Sabbath](#): > > Sooo… you actually have no philosophical backings for your statements, just some theoretical and nebulously defined principles of something you like to call communism but is really a mutated utopianism combined with fascism? > [@mutantmoose](#): > > Also, while I’m here, I wish you’d cut out all that “You westerners” stuff. You’re aware that Marx was German and that Marx and Engels based their writings on the condition of the working classes in Manchester, England? > > Communism is a western theory not a Soviet theory. The Soviets may have tried to put Communism into practice but they didn’t advance the theory in any meaningful way. I actually come from Manchester myself and Communism is my birthright and heritage in ways that you cannot even begin to understand since you are not steeped in the history and culture of the place that gave birth to it. > > It’s not your birthright and heritage - you just nicked it off us. > [@Olentzero](#): > > > [@Lenin](#): > > > > _Working-class consciousness cannot be genuine political consciousness unless the workers are trained to respond to all cases of tyranny, oppression, violence, and abuse, no matter what class is affected…_ > > So not only are you yourself devoid of working-class consciousness, you’re promoting the suppression of working-class consciousness in the working class itself by saying that the oppressive military junta in Burma is doing the right thing by denying human rights to opponents of the regime and that this is an acceptable state of affairs. > > You’re flying directly into the face of everything Marx and Lenin supported and fought for. You deserve neither the title of communist nor socialist. It’s that simple. > [@E-Sabbath](#): > > I think at this point, der Commissar really should explain where the hell he takes his political philosophy from, because it’s not Das Kapital. Seriously, can you explain the leading teachers of the philosophy you follow? It sure isn’t recognizable to the rest of us. > > Or are you basically the communist equivalent of a snake-handlin’ preacher? Cause that would make sense. You’re so wrong the only way you would make sense is if you were self-educated out of context. You come somewhat closer to being a fascist than a communist. Authoritarian, corporatist rule, by ‘experts’, centrally planned. **Commissar** , since it has been established that you are not a communist, you should take the honourable and honest route by asking a mod to change the title of your thread, rather than compound your blatant naivety and ignorance of well known facts with dishonour and dishonesty. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/196 "2010-08-23T22:04:00Z")
If I feel sorry for the OP, does that make me a Communist sympathizer? ---
**Author:** ![BigBertha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d78d45/32.png) [@BigBertha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigBertha)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/197 "2010-08-23T22:28:51Z")
> [@Olentzero](#): > > > [@Commissar](#): > > > > Now I’ve seen everything. A capitalist telling me that I’m a bad Communist… 😉 > > There’s _something_ wrong with this sentence, but I can’t quite put my finger on it. Fellow Dopers? Any help here? Come now, just admit youre a capitalist and come out of the closet,😃 ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2010, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/198 "2010-08-23T23:27:12Z")
> [@Olentzero](#): > > > [@Commissar](#): > > > > Now I’ve seen everything. A capitalist telling me that I’m a bad Communist… 😉 > > There’s _something_ wrong with this sentence, but I can’t quite put my finger on it. Fellow Dopers? Any help here? Capitalist isn’t capitalized? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2010, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/199 "2010-08-24T00:29:39Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > Hmmm. Suspiciously good English for someone “born and raised in the Soviet Union.” Writing style sounds a lot like that other new member who started the I Am a Racist thread, which in turn reminded me of someone else. Not that I’m saying they’re all the same person. But hmmm. Well, if the racist guy was a troll, said person went to a lot of effort finding someone from a racist board, did some basic research, all just to come here and troll? Pretty pathetic. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2010, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964/200 "2010-08-24T00:37:57Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > > [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > > > Hmmm. Suspiciously good English for someone “born and raised in the Soviet Union.” Writing style sounds a lot like that other new member who started the I Am a Racist thread, which in turn reminded me of someone else. Not that I’m saying they’re all the same person. But hmmm. > > Well, if the racist guy was a troll, said person went to a lot of effort finding someone from a racist board, did some basic research, all just to come here and troll? Pretty pathetic. Fucking time limits! At any rate, I don’t know if THIS guy is a troll or not. However, assuming he’s NOT, at this point, I wouldn’t bother trying to argue with him, because his entire argument is basically full of shit. I don’t think I’ve EVER agreed with both **Crafter\_Man** AND **Starving Artist** in a political thread before. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-communist/550964.md?page=11)