# I am a pimp warrior. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 13, 2001, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316 "2001-05-13T15:17:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 9:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/41 "2001-05-14T09:28:19Z")
I killed all his thugs. That’ll show him for using a homophobic user name. Hecubus: Wanna invite Dionysus to the StraightDope alliance? ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/42 "2001-05-14T09:32:14Z")
Pimp\_Cat here… invite me, yo ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/43 "2001-05-14T12:31:03Z")
Once I get to the office, I’ll throw out new invites, and re-invite you, Sue! Remember: Once you whack all of some mothafucka’s thugs with drive-bys, go back and do invade house on 'em. If they got no thugs, you get their stuff. TO INCLUDE all their money, and all their lowriders. I’ve taken 5 lowriders and around 70k from one person before. Don’t let 'em back up when you got 'em down! ---
**Author:** ![Joyfulgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f04885/32.png) [@Joyfulgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joyfulgirl)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/44 "2001-05-14T13:00:15Z")
PalmolivePimp checkin in. Off to read the P-Bible. ---
**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/45 "2001-05-14T13:13:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Manservant Hecubus \* > \*\* and re-invite you, Sue! \*\* No need to sweetie. Hasteur sent me a message and I found your invite. Somma this pimp s\*\*t is whack. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/46 "2001-05-14T13:17:13Z")
Everyone’s invited or already joined. I just hired a defensive thug for the alliance, if you gets attacked, he’ll be joinin’ the fray on your back. ---
**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/47 "2001-05-14T13:26:54Z")
> [@](#): > > One of your hoes has sex with President Clinton, only to find out afterwards that it didn’t count as sex and she made $10 instead of $100. Always prepared, you have it on film. +$5,000. I and I am gettin us another lowrider! ---
**Author:** ![Joyfulgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f04885/32.png) [@Joyfulgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joyfulgirl)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2001, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/48 "2001-05-14T14:53:22Z")
Note to self: _Never again_ click on a link called “News Flash: your car has been vandalized.” Ew ew ew ew ew ew… \ ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2001, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/49 "2001-05-15T04:29:20Z")
We need more pimps from the SDMB. There have got to be more pimp minded people on here. Get in your lowriders, pass some forties around, and throw the condoms like confetti, because the StraightDope alliance needs to rule. The Straight Dope Alliance: Eradicating ignorance with AK-47s. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2001, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/50 "2001-05-15T04:30:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sue Duhnym \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > One of your hoes has sex with President Clinton, only to find out afterwards that it didn’t count as sex and she made $10 instead of $100. Always prepared, you have it on film. +$5,000. > > I and I am gettin us another lowrider! > \*\* I had the Clinton today for five k, and today, one of my thugs had a sex change and became a hoe. ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2001, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/51 "2001-05-15T04:35:57Z")
I had 3 of my hoes form a lesbian marriage, and Springer paid me $14,000 to let them go. Damn other pimp laid the smack down on me, tho. Thanks for getting my back, Cyni. ---
**Author:** ![Joyfulgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f04885/32.png) [@Joyfulgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joyfulgirl)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2001, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/52 "2001-05-15T05:07:34Z")
2 attacks against me in 5 hours. I feel like someone’s bitch… ---
**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2001, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/53 "2001-05-15T05:51:12Z")
Pistols suck. They’re useless against attacks and you need big firepower. Buy pistols if you have no other choice, but you need AK-47s. I have 10 and I still need more. Lowriders are useless unless you do drivebys or want to move cities. Save your money and buy BIG guns. Whores aren’t happy unless you have some ratio of thugs/whores…I do not know what it is. If you produce crack, your whores will make more money that turn. If you use 2 turns, your thugs will produce 1 crack rock each and drink 6 beers among them. This may change but it’s what I’ve seen so far. Do not attack another pimp unless you have a lot of turns or your alliance is there to help. You may just waste the turns (“can’t find, polish your glass eye!”) or just lose. You really have to pick off thugs (and whores) before you can steal cars and money. Do a test attack. You don’t know what kind of firepower the other pimp has until you try. If they have bigger guns, move on. I’ve noticed that the pimps with no lowriders have BIG guns. Whores don’t seem willing to leave for anything under 100 crack rocks. You may get one w/100…but I’ve gotten none with 200. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2001, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/54 "2001-05-15T06:02:30Z")
I am getting attacked by 17517. He has killed ALL my thugs. DAMMIT! ---
**Author:** ![Mnementh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/898d66/32.png) [@Mnementh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mnementh)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2001, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/55 "2001-05-15T06:07:40Z")
Dammit. I should’ve been Pimpmenth. Oh well, feel free to look me up as regular ol’ **Mnementh**. I’m sittin’ pretty in NYC. Biatch. ---
**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2001, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/56 "2001-05-15T06:07:57Z")
I’ll try and help you out. What’s his arsenal like? ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2001, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/57 "2001-05-15T06:11:54Z")
His arsenal is 20 AK-47s, 2 shotguns, and the rest are pistols. ---
**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2001, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/58 "2001-05-15T06:14:12Z")
I’ll see what I can do. I lost 9 thugs while I was having dinner, so I’m not hopeful. I have less AKs, but more other stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2001, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/59 "2001-05-15T06:18:20Z")
I had 5 thugs die, he had 3. He got $361. He now has 21 AKs and 6 TEK-9s ---
**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2001, 6:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316/60 "2001-05-15T06:19:35Z")
BTW, alliance thugs only got off two rounds. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-pimp-warrior/65316.md?page=4)