# I am a telefundraiser
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [December 14, 2002, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734 "2002-12-14T15:41:20Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@erislover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erislover)
#### Post date: [December 15, 2002, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/21 "2002-12-15T20:33:16Z")
Watch out for people like me. If I’m feeling particularly eristic I like to goad telemarketers on. I’m the one that gets away, every time.
I hope you do well at it, I understand it can become quite frustrating. But there are people out there who don’t mind the calls (it doesn’t bother me), so good luck to you.
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### Author:  [@Flymaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flymaster)
#### Post date: [December 15, 2002, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/22 "2002-12-15T22:58:38Z")
If you’re calling me uninvited, then you’re a bad person. Simple as that. Quit and get a real job.
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### Author:  [@erislover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erislover)
#### Post date: [December 15, 2002, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/23 "2002-12-15T23:19:37Z")
What is a “real job”? One they pay you “real money” for? :rolleyes:
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### Author:  [@Iteki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iteki)
#### Post date: [December 15, 2002, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/24 "2002-12-15T23:25:51Z")
Flymaster, start a company and hire us.
The suggestion is about as useful.
I have been meaning to get a little use out of that degree…
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### Author:  [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)
#### Post date: [December 15, 2002, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/25 "2002-12-15T23:52:17Z")
I understand that you are desperate, but please look for something else because what you are doing is wrong.
Any business or charity that makes an unsolicited call to my house loses my patronage forever. And right now, with all my holiday shopping completed, I have time to be “creative” with the telemarketers. I won’t be nasty, but I’ll mess with you and waste a lot of your time.
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### Author:  [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/26 "2002-12-16T00:02:56Z")
_cough_
I may end up in a call center soon - I broke down and went over to my local temp agency Thursday. I did mention that I would highly prefer to be in an inbound call center (like a customer service center) than an outbound call center if at all possible. That way, I can put people on hold while I do my classwork. 😉
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### Author:  [@Iteki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iteki)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/27 "2002-12-16T01:08:45Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by lainaf \*
> **I understand that you are desperate, but please look for something else because what you are doing is wrong.**
Oh please! :rolleyes: Get over yourself already.
“What you are doing is irritating.” - I agree and accept, along with variations on the same theme.
“What you are doing is wrong.” - Eh, no. Save the for the whalers.
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### Author:  [@Flymaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flymaster)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/28 "2002-12-16T01:56:38Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Iteki \*
> \*\*Flymaster, start a company and hire us.
> The suggestion is about as useful.
>
> I have been meaning to get a little use out of that degree… \*\*
Look, my phone is not a charity. I don’t owe you business. But that’s EXACTLY what you’re doing, by calling me! Forcing me to become a customer of yours (not your business, but you). I have no option about whether or not I want to listen to your drivel. Frankly, I know for a FACT that there are jobs to be had out there (my roommate just offered me a job at Old Navy, and other stores are equally hiring). The economy is NOT a free ride anymore, but neither is it an excuse for you to drag me into your little hell.
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### Author:  [@Iteki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iteki)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/29 "2002-12-16T02:18:08Z")
I agree, telemarketing and all it’s variants are insanely intrusive most of the time. I am not in the states, and I understand you guys have it incredibly much harder than over here, but even from a Euro perspective I agree with you. The companies are engaging in a practise that deserves in every way your anger and contempt.
However… The reason the companies exist is not because people are willing to work there. The reason the companies exist are because this apparantly works. Some dipsticks out there are buying their crap or donating or whatever it is. The companies would probably make the exact same profit if they used touch-tone steered recorded messages. Sure they loose out on the people who buy or donate out of the pure joy of talking to another human being (and yes, people do buy to keep you on the phone and in the hopes you will call again because they haven’t talked to a living soul in 2 weeks), but they gain on not having to pay out the pittance to workers.
While it is a whole nuther discussion, yes, there are jobs available. I just logged in to see what is available here in my small town. Of 28 jobs on offer 25 require specific skills I don’t have (nurse, system technician, professor of engineering). The other 3 are waitressing jobs. I would be more miserable dropping shit and getting my ass grabbed than you can make me when I call you. On top of that, I hope to at some stage soon get an “real job” (as it is so condescendingly put) and an anonymous crap job such as the one I have increases my chances much more than if I have been serving lunch and beers to my prospective bosses for the past 6 months. Would you prefer to support me, and the rest of the cold-calling industry on your tax-dollar, or would you rather just hang up when a stranger calls?
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### Author:  [@Flymaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flymaster)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/30 "2002-12-16T03:28:40Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Iteki \*
> \*\*The other 3 are waitressing jobs. I would be more miserable dropping shit and getting my ass grabbed than you can make me when I call you. On top of that, I hope to at some stage soon get an “real job” (as it is so condescendingly put) and an anonymous crap job such as the one I have increases my chances much more than if I have been serving lunch and beers to my prospective bosses for the past 6 months. Would you prefer to support me, and the rest of the cold-calling industry on your tax-dollar, or would you rather just hang up when a stranger calls? \*\*
I’d much prefer that you take one of the good, honest, non annoying waitressing jobs. Sure, you may hate it, but at least people won’t hate you. And if you decide you don’t want to do that, then DON’T WORK, and don’t come bitching to me when I tell you that I don’t respect you, and don’t consider your job to be “real”.
I would respect telemarketers an INFINITE amount more if they would just admit that what they’re doing is horrible, and would just claim a welfare check. I, for one, would MUCH rather pay taxes for welfare than have people calling me at dinner (and yes, I’m completely serious).
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### Author:  [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/31 "2002-12-16T03:50:32Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Flymaster \*
> \*\*I’d much prefer that you take one of the good, honest, non annoying waitressing jobs. Sure, you may hate it, but at least people won’t hate you. And if you decide you don’t want to do that, then DON’T WORK, and don’t come bitching to me when I tell you that I don’t respect you, and don’t consider your job to be “real”.
> \*\*
I was a sportswriter for several years, so it’s not like it’s terribly important to me to have a job where people like me.
And it almost goes without saying that earning your respect isn’t terribly important to me, either.
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### Author:  [@Primaflora](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Primaflora)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/32 "2002-12-16T03:58:51Z")
Geez, you mean you’d rather eat and pay bills and stuff than have Flymaster’s respect, Snooooopy?
The horror, the horror!
I did a few weeks of telemarketing and I hated it but we needed the money.
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### Author:  [@erislover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erislover)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/33 "2002-12-16T04:27:08Z")
> [@](#):
>
> I would respect telemarketers an INFINITE amount more if they would just admit that what they’re doing is horrible, and would just claim a welfare check.
Really, I don’t mind at all. It is a shame your life is so scarred by this affair. I just tell them I don’t need what they’re selling. But some people _do_ buy what they sell (else there wouldn’t be any telemarketing).
Moral relativism in action folks, you saw it here first.
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### Author:  [@InternetLegend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InternetLegend)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/34 "2002-12-16T08:08:44Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Lynn Bodoni \*
> **I used to donate to our local PBS stations (we have two in the are) regularly…until they started telephoning me. Since they didn’t remove my name from their lists after three (3) separate requests, I quit donating to them.**
Years ago, I made a deal with someone from my local PBS station. I told him that I would set up an automatic donation from my checking account for $5 a month on the condition that no one from the station contact me again. He agreed. A month later, I got a form letter from them, and I called the station to remind them of our deal. I didn’t get anything else from them until last week, and that may have been because I moved to a new address. I plan to call them again Monday to ask them if they’d like me to continue donating.
I gave up on trying to come up with clever or original retorts for telemarketers. I tell people who are selling things that I don’t buy anything or take any information about products or services over the phone, and I tell fundraisers that I don’t make pledges or donate over the phone. Then I say goodbye pleasantly and hang up. I only wish it was that easy to get rid of all the people from church or the PTA who call to ask me to do things.
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### Author:  [@Iteki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iteki)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 9:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/35 "2002-12-16T09:22:04Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Flymaster \*
> **I’d much prefer that you …**
Yes, your preferences matter to me.
> [@](#):
>
> \*\*
> Sure, you may hate it, but at least people won’t hate you.
> \*\*
Yes, because what others think of me is infinatly more important to me than how I feel.
> [@](#):
>
> \*\*
> I would respect telemarketers an INFINITE amount more if they would just admit that what they’re doing is horrible …\*\*
Read my post. I just did.
> [@](#):
>
> \*\*
> … and would just claim a welfare check.
> \*\*
I don’t need or want a welfare check, I have a job.
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### Author:  [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/36 "2002-12-16T12:20:36Z")
How did I just _know_ this thread was going to end up like this?
I warned youse didn’t I?? 😃
Oh, and **Flymaster** …get knotted mate!
Y’know what? I love my job. Some of the answering machines are pretty boring, but most of the people I speak to are great. Sure, some get peeved when we ring at dinner time, but there are many more who are happy to have someone to talk to. Older people who may greet few visitors or get no phone calls from their busy kids, people who are home from work sick, and might want to just share their pain and misery with you for a few minutes. Young mums who are sick of speaking toddler-talk to their offspring, and retired gents who love the opportunity to have a rave on the phone just so they can get out of mowing the lawn (again, for the third time this week).
Most people either can’t afford or choose not to donate to the charity I currently seek funds for. That’s cool. I don’t mind. I know things are tight in the economy, and it can be difficult to find a few extra bucks to help out. But that doesn’t stop me chatting to the people on the other end of the phone (if they want to chat of course!) But funnily enough, most people do.
And I don’t give a flying fuck if someone hangs up as soon as I’ve introduced myself…that’s cool too. I might have interrupted them at a dinner party, or having a bath, or even engaging in coital relations with their SO (or their not-so SO!!). They might have had a gut-full of charities in the last week or month, and I’m just the straw to break the camels back, so to speak. I apologise for stuffing up their night, and funnily enough, most people end up laughing along with me.
But don’t tell me that my job is worthless, or that my fantastic workmates are somehow less-than-human. While telemarketing might just be stop-gap work for most of them (in between acting jobs, law/medicine/arts studies, enabling them to top up their disability pensions, allowing them to earn some money while they set up businesses, giving some the opportunity to make the transition to Old Age pensions more gracefully) I can assure you we still all take our jobs very seriously, and, better than getting mega-donations for our respective charities is hoping we haven’t given anybody a hard time in the process. We don’t enjoy hassling people. And funnily enough, most people aren’t hassled by our calls.
Y’see, you can be POLITE when you tell us to go away, and funnily enough, we will! 'Cos we’re people too (funnily enough) and we experience the same aggravations that you do. How do you think WE feel, after coming home from a hard day on the phones, only to hear the ‘Brrrng Brrrng’ of our own telephones with a Telefundraiser on the other end?? You think YOU have it bad…bwhahahahahahaaa
But I’m nice to people…and I say G’day and how’s ya night going, but sorry, I can’t help this week/month with a donation 'cos I’m broke/philosophically against your cause/or whatever. Why should I be mean and agressive towards someone who takes 20 seconds of the 86,400 seconds available in each day? It doesn’t make ME a better person for having done so.
It’s funny, but I love being a telemarketer.
Now how’s about we stop flogging this horse and get onto something more worthwhile…like LAWYERS!! 😃
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### Author:  [@Ice\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ice_Wolf)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/37 "2002-12-16T12:37:19Z")
It’s a poor show when people can’t start a thread, expressing pride in what they do, without having naysayers come in and try a trampling all over them.
I’ve said it before in another, nastier thread – I don’t give money, or buy stuff, from telemarketers (pleading poverty, here), but I am polite to them, firm in my denial, but without being rude. Good on you, **Snooooopy** , for starting this thread, and telling us why you like your job.
Ignore the grizzlers.
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### Author:  [@Iteki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iteki)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/38 "2002-12-16T14:58:42Z")
**kambukta** , you just mentioned the bit that, for me, makes the job worth doing. I am in market-research rather than sales, so all I want from the people is for them to work for the company for free 😉 The element of (mad as it sounds) brightening up somones day with my call.
I have a pleasant telephone manner, and I am good at gauging the persons state so I know when they want to have a giggle and when they want be commisserated with and when they just want to get the interview done at top speed and get back to their lives.
If I were to weigh up the people who are activly annoyed at my ringing, against the people who are activly pleased that I have called, then the pleased people win out every time. Obviously the largest majority don’t really care either way, but of the people who have a strong opinion, it the positive experiences that win out. Mom’s who haven’t spoken to an adult all day, pensioners who haven’t spoken to anyone all week, slightly drunk people on a friday evening who think the questions are just hysterically funny, the list is very huge. I have heard so many great stories in the 6 months I have been working there, I have anecdotes to last me a lifetime over. I had had old ladies start to cry while thanking me for such a lovely chat, and I have been invited in to tea and biscuits if I am ever passing by in a hundred towns.
Even if the grumps (my codeword for aggressive, self-absorbed, obnoxious toerags) were to expand 10 fold, they still don’t knock the bits of the job that are actually fun. The grumps I can deal with, I just move on to the next call and never think of them again. The people who take their time to say “no thank you, goodnight now” I think of warmly, as I do those who give of their time to help me get my job done. The little-old-ladies and the chatty moms and the flirty old men who I have a fun chat with I will remember for a long time to come.
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### Author:  [@heresiarch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/heresiarch)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/39 "2002-12-16T18:16:40Z")
I know this thread isn’t entitled “Ask the telefundraiser,” but how much of a cut does the telemarketing company take from the charity? Is it a percentage or a fixed rate or some other arrangement?
Try to keep your sense of humor. And I hope you find a job you like better.
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### Author:  [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)
#### Post date: [December 16, 2002, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-a-telefundraiser/142734/40 "2002-12-16T19:25:23Z")
Anybody who complains about **Snoooopy** calling their house uninvited could change the situation by offering him another job.
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