# I am America **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 27, 2006, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292 "2006-07-27T17:19:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2006, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/1 "2006-07-27T17:19:14Z")
That’s right folks, if you want to know the average American, here I am. According to a poll posted on [CNN.com](http://edition.cnn.com/2006/POLITICS/07/27/mg.thu/index.html) , Wisconsin is the most ‘representative’ state in the union. > [@](#): > > The Badger State comes closer than any other to state-by-state averages on 12 key measures, according to a new analysis by CNN Polling Director Keating Holland that takes a fresh look at U.S. Census data So, since I am just about precisely in the middle of the average expected lifespan, and am solidly middle-class, and I live in Wisconsin, I conclude that I am the average American. Please don’t tell al-Qaeda. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2006, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/2 "2006-07-27T17:25:59Z")
If [this](http://www.badgerbadgerbadger.com) is average then I’m glad I’m not there! ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2006, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/3 "2006-07-27T17:32:33Z")
Woo! \*We’re number 47! We’re number 47! We’re number 47!\* Woooooo!! ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2006, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/4 "2006-07-27T17:35:09Z")
Well then [SUIT UP!](http://www.costumesinc.com/p7884/Deluxe-Muscle-Captain-America-Costume--Adult.html?&User_ID=29718182&st=4468&st2=90825394&st3=79811786) Remember, gloves & accessories are extra! ---
**Author:** ![Uncommon\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Uncommon\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncommon_Sense)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2006, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/5 "2006-07-27T18:55:12Z")
> [@August West](#): > > That’s right folks, if you want to know the average American, here I am. > > According to a poll posted on [CNN.com](http://edition.cnn.com/2006/POLITICS/07/27/mg.thu/index.html) , Wisconsin is the most ‘representative’ state in the union. > > So, since I am just about precisely in the middle of the average expected lifespan, and am solidly middle-class, and I live in Wisconsin, I conclude that I am the average American. Please don’t tell al-Qaeda. Ditto! ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2006, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/6 "2006-07-27T19:16:12Z")
Hey now **Sense** , just think of all the money pollsters would save if they just asked the two of us for our opinions! ---
**Author:** ![NicePete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ee7513/32.png) [@NicePete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NicePete)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2006, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/7 "2006-07-27T19:48:54Z")
I’m glad the average American knows who August West is. ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2006, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/8 "2006-07-27T19:53:36Z")
1. Massachusetts 11.6 Blah. ---
**Author:** ![a35362](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@a35362](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/a35362)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2006, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/9 "2006-07-27T19:57:30Z")
According to that list, Montana and Virginia are tied, Kentucky and New Mexico are tied, Iowa and Texas are tied, and Maine and New Hampshire are tied, yet they put them in alphabetical order and just number them. ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2006, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/10 "2006-07-27T20:22:39Z")
> [@NicePete](#): > > I’m glad the average American knows who August West is. Sure, he’s the one who loves his Pearly Baker more than his wine. Everyone knows that. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2006, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/11 "2006-07-27T21:46:39Z")
I’m from Missouri. We need to be just a little more average and we’ll have Wisconsin beat! Probably just get a few more people to become Lutheran and we’ll have it. ---
**Author:** ![krisolov](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/krisolov/32/3724_2.png) [@krisolov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/krisolov)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/12 "2006-07-28T02:11:28Z")
well damn, Maryland is right down in the 30 range with Colorado. It’s nice company, but we really need to work on getting more freaky. ---
**Author:** ![Revenant\_Threshold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f1d935/32.png) [@Revenant\_Threshold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revenant_Threshold)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/13 "2006-07-28T02:17:24Z")
Ah, so _you’re_ the average American? Fair enough… \<.\< \>.\> _runs up and whacks you in the back of the head with a two-by-four_ Damn you! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Mehitabel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Mehitabel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mehitabel)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/14 "2006-07-28T04:01:49Z")
Heh. 48. I knew not owning a car would pay off someday. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/15 "2006-07-28T04:04:07Z")
I’m an Ohioan, and we only narrowly missed the “Most Average” designation. Believe me, I’m not gonna lose any sleep over it… ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/16 "2006-07-28T12:14:29Z")
> [@August West](#): > > I am America Good morning, America, how are you? ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/17 "2006-07-28T12:38:59Z")
> [@ShibbOleth](#): > > Good morning, America, how are you? I take it that your Mom is gonna hit **August West** for back child support, huh **ShibbOleth**? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/18 "2006-07-28T20:07:49Z")
With \>1600 posts under your belt, I’d think you’d know there’s only one way to title a thread like this: “Ask the Average American”. ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/19 "2006-07-28T21:14:37Z")
So, America, did you name your horse yet? ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2006, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292/20 "2006-07-28T22:42:08Z")
> [@Agust West](#): > > That’s right folks, if you want to know the average American, here I am. [goth] Pfft… conformist. [/goth] [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-america/366292.md?page=2)