# I am English bring it on ! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 6, 2013, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822 "2013-07-06T23:21:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Enter\_the\_Flagon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Enter\_the\_Flagon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enter_the_Flagon)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/41 "2013-07-07T04:49:57Z")
> [@blondebear](#): > > I’m an English boy > Precisely made > You can pin me down > I am not afraid > I show no fear > I will serve with joy > I’m proud to be here > An English boy > > _–P. Townshend_ Apropos of nothing, that Townshend lad makes a very underrated lyricist. ---
**Author:** ![Ken001](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/43a26b/32.png) [@Ken001](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ken001)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/42 "2013-07-07T04:56:48Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > We had a little celebration in the US a few days ago about beating you guys. Celebration? Really? I thought it was a National Day of Mourning about being kicked out of the British Empire. Here is what John Cleese (or not) wrote when you elected George W Bush: A clip - “You will cease playing American “football.” There is only one kind of proper football; you call it “soccer”. Those of you brave enough will, in time, will be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American “football”, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies).” [http://www.goodeatsfanpage.com/humor/otherhumor/cleese\_letter.htm](http://www.goodeatsfanpage.com/humor/otherhumor/cleese_letter.htm) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/43 "2013-07-07T05:32:45Z")
The English made many contributions, but the flush toilet tops the list. The English lost the ability to win wars in the 20th century, having the Yanks bail them out of WWI and the Soviets and Yanks in WWII. Seriously, without that help, you guys would be speaking German and goosestepping. Rum, sodomy and the lash were naval contributions, eclipsing superior gunnery and boarding school buggery. Points to Gryffindor for The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, The Who and Led Zepplin. Points off for The Spice Girls and the late Princess Margaret. Props for the NHS, but geez, get a dental counterpart. Fortunately the English do not make cars in companies they own anymore, and now cars made in the UK don’t completely suck. Because Germans design and perform quality control. British cars suck. How badly? Well, when Fix Or Repair Daily Ford bought Jaguar (pronounced jag-war on the west side of the pond) the quality improved dramatically. That is nothing to be proud of. Monarchy. Still? It was idiotically out of date 200 years ago. But since tourism is the chief industry of the British Isles, you can’t get rid of it? Normally, I’m quite an anglophile, but the OP just has something about his attitude that reminds me that most Brits love “football”. Shakespeare, Dryden, Milton, Blake, Spencer to go out on a good note. ---
**Author:** ![Namkcalb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c89c15/32.png) [@Namkcalb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Namkcalb)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 8:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/44 "2013-07-07T08:49:20Z")
> [@The\_Second\_Stone](#): > > The English lost the ability to win wars in the 20th century, having the Yanks bail them out of WWI and the Soviets and Yanks in WWII. Seriously, without that help, you guys would be speaking German and goosestepping. I was about to unleash weapons-grade sarcasm against you, then I realised you at least mentioned the Soviets. > [@](#): > > Props for the NHS, but geez, get a dental counterpart. [The British have the healthiest teeth in the world](http://www.economist.com/node/15060097) > [@](#): > > Monarchy. Still? It was idiotically out of date 200 years ago. But since tourism is the chief industry of the British Isles, you can’t get rid of it? The Monarchy has many flaws but at least it keeps R/republicans entertained and distracted. ---
**Author:** ![FaerieBeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e95f7d/32.png) [@FaerieBeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FaerieBeth)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 9:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/45 "2013-07-07T09:46:07Z")
[This](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkF_XpA5P48) kind of seems appropriate…maybe? ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 9:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/46 "2013-07-07T09:46:45Z")
> [@Lust4Life](#): > > we beat you to shit militarily and always and every time against overwhelming odds I know some Zulus who might disagree. ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/47 "2013-07-07T13:51:50Z")
> [@Mr.Kobayashi](#): > > You’re lacking that classic English trait, understatement! It’s un-English to be proud of being English. Even Sir Isaac said “If I have seen further, it is only by standing on the shoulders of giants.” Oh. [My bloody foot](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1XPHL4Q86t4). And also google “ABC for Baby Patriots”. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/48 "2013-07-07T14:31:16Z")
Although I am English by birth - I could play cricket for Yorkshire, I consider myself Australian, having lived here since I was 2. I used to feel that I was English until I went to live in England and decided that I didn’t wish to identify with them. I remember seeing the movie _The Best of Enemies_, as a kid, when I still thought of myself as English and I loved the exchange between Major Richardson and Captain Blasi. They are arguing about which army is better, the English or the Italians. Blasi suggests that the English have no great military successes. Richardson says, “What about Dunkirk?” Blasi replies, “But it was a resounding defeat.” And Richardson replies, “Yes, but seeing that as a victory is a tremendous success.” ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/49 "2013-07-07T14:39:28Z")
> [@Lust4Life](#): > > I am English, I know that a hell of a lot of the world hates our Guts. > > I am very proud of being English. > > We are guilty of beating all of the known world at everything we did. > > Not only did we beat you to shit militarily and always and every time against overwhelming odds, we also discovered most of the laws of science, Physics, chemistry etc. > So come on you sad Gits . > > Explain to me why you’re here, not because of us , but inspite of us ! Aspirin was first isolated by Felix Hoffmann, a chemist with the German company Bayer in 1897. Q: Would you like one? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/50 "2013-07-07T16:29:05Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > I know some Zulus who might disagree. Not the ones at Rorke’s Drift, that’s for sure. ---
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/51 "2013-07-07T17:05:58Z")
“Colour” vs “Color”, “Favour” vs “Favor”, “Labour” vs “Labor”…what a waste of “u’s”…just think of all the ink and toner, plus paper and quills, that have been wasted over the generations due to the extra u’s! Shame on U. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/52 "2013-07-07T17:19:22Z")
I, for one, am glad I live in (the expansion of) The Colonies. Our cheddar is much improved. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/53 "2013-07-07T17:20:26Z")
Things dry out that side of the channel? ---
**Author:** ![Filbert](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/filbert/32/3433_2.png) [@Filbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Filbert)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/54 "2013-07-07T18:16:55Z")
> [@Musicat](#): > > I, for one, am glad I live in (the expansion of) The Colonies. Our cheddar is much improved. What?! You can insult our people, monarchy, military or weather with impunity- but never, _never_ insult our cheese. ---
**Author:** ![toofs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4491bb/32.png) [@toofs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/toofs)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/55 "2013-07-07T18:41:12Z")
You people did some great things, like, I don’t know, that whole empire thing. You should be most proud! You people did so much ass-kicking and fucking in other cultures that you changed the world for the better. I mean that, too. Look how well things worked out for places colonized by the Spanish or Le French. The whole world does not hate your guts. That right clearly and dearly belongs to my beloved USA. Death To America™ is unique to my country, has prior art and wide distribution, so bugger off on that one mate. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/56 "2013-07-07T20:54:06Z")
> [@bump](#): > > Not the ones at Rorke’s Drift, that’s for sure. I was thinking more Isandlwana. ---
**Author:** ![Svejk\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea666f/32.png) [@Svejk\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Svejk_1)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2013, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/57 "2013-07-07T23:23:24Z")
The English blow. When’s the last time you’ve won Wimbledon? ---
**Author:** ![Lust4Life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecc23a/32.png) [@Lust4Life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lust4Life)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2013, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/58 "2013-07-08T00:19:00Z")
Damn ! Sussed me ! Yep was totally drunk last night. Sorry Yanks must try harder ! And may I say that “Rum , Sodomy and the Lash” are good things, and that American civilisation is held back because of their “Rummist”, “Buggerist” and their Anti Sado masochistic prejudices, so much that they drink weak beer, disguised by serving it frozen, and all true American men honestly wish to be buggered by French men, but are too shy to bring the subject up. But don’t thank me ! Its thanks enough when I see my American mates serving along side me in M/E war zones , wishing that I’d bugger them, but regretful because knowing that I’m not in the American army so I’m not gay. . And I think that I am really, really going to pay for this in the very near future. And lets get get all of the “I’m Gay and want to be a martyr” tossers in on this to show just how hurt that they are by Gay banter . Though American Special Forces won’t, because they know that its true and they wouldn’t buy a beer unless they had electrodes attached to their balls, I am really, really going to pay for this in the near future ---
**Author:** ![mbh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@mbh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mbh)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2013, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/59 "2013-07-08T00:42:23Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > I was thinking more Isandlwana. The Zulus won the battle, but the Brits won the war. ---
**Author:** ![colander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e8c25b/32.png) [@colander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/colander)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2013, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822/60 "2013-07-08T01:09:06Z")
you’re no Halford, buddy boy [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-english-bring-it-on/662822.md?page=4)