# I am gonna buy a deserted island and set up a new society...who is with me? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 24, 2000, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186 "2000-10-24T23:39:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![beagledave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/61 "2000-10-25T01:39:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Odieman \* > \*\*Dave, sometimes a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do (I’ve always wanted to say that) \*\* I salute you soldier. Lesser men would scamper away…but dammit, I want to her the gory details afterword…, 😛 (softly humming them from Bridge Over The River Kwai) ---
**Author:** ![rjk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed655f/32.png) [@rjk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjk)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/62 "2000-10-25T01:41:39Z")
> [@](#): > > _originally by screech-owl_ > > one grain of sand > two grains of sand > three grains of sand > \… > lots of grains of sand > > ``` > So relaxing... > > ``` Yes, lots of sand … Waves, too … Relaxing … ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/63 "2000-10-25T01:41:51Z")
[QUOTE] \*Originally posted by beagledave \* \*\* > [@](#): > > a thousand apologies m’lady…\*\* Apologies unnecessary but accepted. And you may rub my back as an act of contrition. After handing me a homebrew that hasn’t been backwashed, er, taste-tested. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/64 "2000-10-25T01:42:25Z")
I may have missed something - where is this island? Off the coast of Greenland? New Jersey? ---
**Author:** ![Angkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/fbc32d/32.png) [@Angkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angkins)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/65 "2000-10-25T01:43:10Z")
Dave… hunny… i thought we were going to keep that our little secret! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/66 "2000-10-25T01:45:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Colin Wilkinson \* > \*\*I may have missed something - where is this island? Off the coast of Greenland? New Jersey? \*\* Its somewhere warm, and secret… are you coming? You sound like a public relations liason So far we have: Me: Ultimate ruler Sue: Minister in charge of Social Policy beagledave - bikini inspector - Vice regent SkySlash - Cheif policy maker scheech-owl - Minister of natural resources demo - Quality control commisioner ren - executive in charge of Culture Black Night - minister of finance Delta-9 - entertaiment coordinator/cruise director iampunha - cheif shirt inspector gollum - resident Unga Bunga etcetera manager Silver Fire - brew mistress gunslinger - minister of defence Odieman - head concubine. Angkins - Viagra distribution coordinator rjk - hammock inspector ( we have a beach inspector- schreech-owl) ssskuggiii - minister of tanning oil/ suntan lotion application SILENTBOB - executive puppeteer Still to be confirmed: Satan:ambassador in charge of cultural import Coldfire: export commisioner ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/67 "2000-10-25T01:45:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Colin Wilkinson \* > \*\*I may have missed something - where is this island? Off the coast of Greenland? New Jersey? \*\* Don’t bother me with details. It’s just a nice place to be. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. So relaxing. So many grains of sand to count. ---
**Author:** ![beagledave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/68 "2000-10-25T01:45:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by screech-owl \* > \*\* And you may rub my back as an act of contrition. After handing me a homebrew that hasn’t been backwashed, er, taste-tested. 😉 \*\* …one cold Amber Ale for the lady…let me see where’s that damn cocounut oil…those damn monkey butlers better not be messin’ with my coconut oil! ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/69 "2000-10-25T01:48:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Colin Wilkinson \* > \*\*I may have missed something - where is this island? Off the coast of Greenland? New Jersey? \*\* Its somewhere warm, and secret… are you coming? You sound like a public relations liason So far we have: Me: Ultimate ruler Sue: Minister in charge of Social Policy beagledave - bikini inspector - Vice regent SkySlash - Cheif policy maker scheech-owl - Minister of natural resources demo - Quality control commisioner ren - executive in charge of Culture Black Night - minister of finance Delta-9 - entertaiment coordinator/cruise director iampunha - cheif shirt inspector gollum - resident Unga Bunga etcetera manager Silver Fire - brew mistress gunslinger - minister of defence Odieman - head concubine. Angkins - Viagra distribution coordinator rjk - hammock inspector ( we have a beach inspector- schreech-owl) ssskuggiii - minister of tanning oil/ suntan lotion application SILENTBOB - executive puppeteer (???)or whatever he wants to be 🙂 Welfy - island minstrel, reporting to Delta-9 Zoggie - monkey butler trainer - (yeah monkey butlers!!) Still to be confirmed: Satan:ambassador in charge of cultural import Coldfire: export commisioner Colin Wilkinson - public relations liason ---
**Author:** ![Demo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demo/32/8472_2.png) [@Demo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Demo)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/70 "2000-10-25T01:56:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Angkins \* > \*\*Dem, > > could I get a delivery to my hut? > > Odie is a little tense and a little od your brew will help the Viagra go down nicely! > > Has anyone seen the keys to the handcuffs? \*\* Angie, I shall consign some poste-haste! After testing it a bit more… Oh beagledaaaaaave! 😉 Oh, and I just happen to have a spare pair of cuffs right here. ---
**Author:** ![Angkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/fbc32d/32.png) [@Angkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angkins)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/71 "2000-10-25T02:02:38Z")
Great Dem! Can I borrow them… and will the key work in the pair poor Odie is stuck in now? ---
**Author:** ![relic\_11](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/50afbb/32.png) [@relic\_11](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/relic_11)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/72 "2000-10-25T02:17:02Z")
> [@](#): > > _originally posted by **screech-owl** _ > Hey look everyone, a refrigerator. > Ice cubes ought to be ready in about a half-hour. > > And if you take the last ice cube, refill the tray! Can I be in charge of making the ice? I promise we’ll never run out. ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/73 "2000-10-25T02:20:25Z")
Hmmm. Just noticed my post count. 490. Ten away from the big 5-0-0. Sounds like a good reason to party! Deserted island. Lots of sand. Breezes. Home-brew. Contrite male rubbing my back. ESPN. A remote. And a filled ice-cube tray (courtesy of relic\_11 - my thanks!) Who could ask for aything more? ---
**Author:** ![relic\_11](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/50afbb/32.png) [@relic\_11](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/relic_11)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/74 "2000-10-25T02:34:32Z")
**screech-owl** , in honnor of your 500, do you want me to make ice cube shapes for you? Or how about a little italian shaved lemon ice? That is, if I am appointed… (See? I do parties too!) ---
**Author:** ![AuntiePam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/75 "2000-10-25T02:39:40Z")
I don’t drink or smoke pot (gives me giggles), me in a bikini would make you want to go blind (after you finished laughing). Hmmmmm. Need something for skinny old boring people to do. Hey! Can I be the Story Lady? I’ll bring my Hap and Leonard books and read bedtime stories to ya’ll. Sample from “Two Bear Mambo” – the guys are sitting around watching a Discovery special on the mating habits of bears. Hanson: Can you believe that shit? I was a kid, they wouldn’t show two dogs behind one another for fear you might think one was gonna mount the other. And now, right there, in front of God and everybody, two bears doing the mambo. Charlie: That’s kind of a sexy angle too. Only thing we’re missing here is a diagram showing us the inside of the girl bear’s ass, so we can see the boy bear’s dick swell into a knot. They do that, I think. Like a dog. Not being specialists on bear’s dicks, none of us responded. We didn’t want to look like fools. ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/76 "2000-10-25T02:42:01Z")
kellibelli? suggestion? put relic\_11 in charge of decadent and yummy concoctions, most of which involve ice? give me a little while and i’ll rig up some sort of waring-ish blender. ecologically conscientious, of course. mmmmmmmmmmm. ---
**Author:** ![relic\_11](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/50afbb/32.png) [@relic\_11](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/relic_11)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/77 "2000-10-25T02:48:27Z")
**screech-owl** , I like the idea. On one condition. Sailorboy is my assistiant. He knows more about drinks anyway. He’ll be 'round soon, he has no personal computer right now.☹ 'Till then, I’ll consult him personaly. ---
**Author:** ![Ad\_Noctum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b19c9b/32.png) [@Ad\_Noctum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ad_Noctum)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/78 "2000-10-25T02:50:08Z")
I’ll be the head Abarista and mix all your fav’ coffee drinks, from Moonshot’s to doublefroth no milk latte’s… I also can mix drinks (a bit strongly I might add) We need someone to stand i nthe watchtower and yell “THE PLANE THE PLANE!!!” I think Doobieous would be perfect for hat ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/79 "2000-10-25T02:50:40Z")
relic\_11 - check with kellibelli she’s in charge :drifts back to temporary state of no-being: ---
**Author:** ![Emperor\_Penguin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c2a13f/32.png) [@Emperor\_Penguin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emperor_Penguin)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2000, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186/80 "2000-10-25T02:52:31Z")
Ooh… This sounds like fun Can I be Minister of Naps and Drinking? (Not that they’re connected or anything, I just figure when on an island paradise, ya go with what ya know.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-gonna-buy-a-deserted-island-and-set-up-a-new-society-who-is-with-me/38186.md?page=5)