# I Am New and I Am Special **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 11, 2011, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333 "2011-10-11T18:30:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/141 "2011-10-13T15:33:04Z")
Hmph, that’s a fine way to behave after **Spectre** let you wear your fancy sneakers and bring your own chair into the thread. ---
**Author:** ![Hello\_Again](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/85e7bf/32.png) [@Hello\_Again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hello_Again)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/142 "2011-10-13T15:39:25Z")
> [@ugly ripe tomato](#): > > Hmph, that’s a fine way to behave after **Spectre** let you wear your fancy sneakers and bring your own chair into the thread. I LOL’d. ---
**Author:** ![Foxy40](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a9a28c/32.png) [@Foxy40](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Foxy40)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/143 "2011-10-13T15:40:02Z")
> [@CrazyCatLady](#): > > Out of curiosity, do you guys pay for the “approved” sneakers? I ask because sometimes it’s hard to afford stuff for a new job when you, ya know, don’t have a paycheck. Most places I’ve worked where this might be an issue have had an unofficial policy of waiving certain points of the dress code until you get your first check. If money is tight and I have something fairly similar to the required footwear (clean white sneakers in good shape, in this case) I would certainly ask if about wearing those for a few weeks until money became less tight, if the manager didn’t bring it up themselves. We have a company that I have set up an account with that allows people to shop with a signed authorization and have the repayment payroll deducted. People with money issues take advantage of that. They carry a very nice, dress code compliant sneaker for 25 dollars. That often gets people through until they can afford a better quality supportive shoe. After working two days, you can go spend up to $100 dollars. We provide tops so this is for scrub slacks and shoes. If they want to buy a high end sneaker for the $100, they are welcome to do so. We take out 25 per paycheck so it isn’t a hardship to repay. ---
**Author:** ![Sacrilegium](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f05b48/32.png) [@Sacrilegium](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sacrilegium)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/144 "2011-10-13T15:40:43Z")
> [@ugly ripe tomato](#): > > Hmph, that’s a fine way to behave after **Spectre** let you wear your fancy sneakers and bring your own chair into the thread. He got to do that?!? I want to wear my fancy sneakers to this thread too! How come he gets to do all that and I don’t? ---
**Author:** ![Foxy40](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a9a28c/32.png) [@Foxy40](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Foxy40)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/145 "2011-10-13T15:41:09Z")
> [@uuaschbaer](#): > > No. Ut oh, someone is going to be in trooouuubbbblllle. ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/146 "2011-10-13T15:57:19Z")
> [@Sacrilegium](#): > > He got to do that?!? I want to wear my fancy sneakers to this thread too! How come he gets to do all that and I don’t? Don’t ask me, I’m stuck sitting on this crummy task chair with a big rip on the seat :mad: ---
**Author:** ![fluiddruid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@fluiddruid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fluiddruid)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/147 "2011-10-13T15:58:25Z")
> [@Acid\_Lamp](#): > > I was going to defend the sneaker thing, (after all what difference does it make so long as they are non skid?) but then I saw that apparently they are the sort that light up? That is ridiculous. I don’t think the employee’s request is totally defensible, I personally just object to the attitude that anyone who asks for something not 100% in line with policy is some kind of a special snowflake. In particular, I could totally see a normal employee going “Hmm. I find this chair really uncomfortable. I don’t want to try to ask the company to buy me a chair. Wait! I have one at home!” … and then being completely crestfallen when being told not only that you can’t do it, but you’re a bad employee for even daring to ask. That’s just not a healthy work environment. I don’t think Foxy’s wrong in saying no, but what I object to is the tacit dismissal of someone daring to even ask. Workplace policies aren’t always immovable commandments. In many, many, many cases, policies are a) old and forgotten, b) unenforced or c) largely unwritten , vague, or nonexistent. A new employee looking to navigate that world should be free to ask their boss without fear of reprisal. Let’s take two real life examples from my own work history. Example A: I get a lot of URLs sent to me for Youtube and listen to Pandora as most employees do (at that company), but in looking at the employee handbook for something unrelated, I noticed that streaming video and audio are explictly forbidden. Me: “Hi, \, can I ask you a question about the employee handbook?” Boss: “Sure.” Me: “It says that I can’t use streaming video or audio… but it seems like most people do. I don’t want to complain about other people, I just don’t want to get in trouble. Is this right?” Boss: “Uh, what? It says that?” (Note: Boss is IT Director) Me: “Yes, let me show you.” Boss: “Oh, we wrote that a long time ago. We didn’t have much bandwidth then. Go ahead and ignore that. I’ll let you know if there’s any problem going forward, but you seem to be fine about getting your work done.” Me: “Okay, great, thanks!” Example B: At a different workplace, I was relatively new but working a lot of off hours on the weekend to finish projects that couldn’t be done during the week. I had a scheduled shift, but was interested in some flexibility to do an errand I wasn’t able to get done because of this. I figured since I was being so flexible to use my personal time for the company at little notice, this wouldn’t be a big deal. Me: “Hi, \, quick question. Would it be OK to move my shift tomorrow early 15 minutes? I was hoping to make it to X and they close at \. I couldn’t go this Saturday since I was working on that project.” Her: “Your scheduled shift is X to Y.” Me: “Right, I just wanted to know if it was possible to move it slightly earlier. I’d still work the same hours, just come in 15 minutes early and leave 15 minutes early. I couldn’t do X because you told me on Friday afternoon that I needed to work on \ on Saturday morning.” Her: \ “I don’t think so. If I let you did that, I’d have to let everyone work whatever they wanted, and it wouldn’t work.” Me: “…okay…” End result? I felt like a tool for approaching her, and a tool for being flexible and helpful. I lost a great deal of respect for the boss, learned not to approach her to resolve problems, and it was a lot of little decisions like this that ultimately caused me to hate the company and leave. The environment was stupid repressive – and I don’t say that because I’m a special snowflake who asks for a lot of stupid shit. I say that because trying to change or even understand the policies was an endless maze of nonsense. I tilted at a lot of windmills there trying to fix or even write down “policies” that dictated all kinds of things. It was a mess and it discouraged any kind of improvement or collaboration, because you’d just end up bound by yet more unexplained, incomprehensible red tape at every turn. Companies that want flexible employees need to be flexible, too, and dressing down someone who asks for reasonable concessions is just messed up management. Even great employees sometimes will want some small things sometimes and a manager should be able to field those requests professionally. Sometimes people ask for things and it’s not practical for whatever reason – fine. Explain those reasons (even if the reason is “I’m sorry, it’s a companywide policy that’s set by our CEO, I can’t make an exception. I understand that it’s difficult”). I hate workplaces that act like you’re just meaningless cogs in a machine that need to question nothing. Yes, there is such a thing as being a pain in the ass about it, but policies aren’t commandments – they can change, they can bend, and, at worst, they can be explained. I’ve had a few employees who wouldn’t or couldn’t understand or accept those explanations, and yeah, that’s unprofessional or annoying – but don’t expect we’re all children, either. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/148 "2011-10-13T16:02:59Z")
> [@Foxy40](#): > > This is an excellent point. I guess if our office was a creative type business it would be a different story. My experiences have been in nonprofits, computer-class-writing, and higher ed offices–never really businesses in which I had a lot of contact with clients. The contact with clients might make a big difference. > [@](#): > > I do find it interesting the people that feel a great management style is to allow people to do whatever they want and deal with any ramifications after the fact. To me, that is a recipe for disaster. And that is over 15 years of management experience talking. I’m not sure who you think is saying that. Certainly I haven’t seen any posts in this thread along those lines. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/149 "2011-10-13T16:06:53Z")
> [@fluiddruid](#): > > Me: “Hi, \, can I ask you a question about the employee handbook?” > > Boss: “Sure.” > > Me: “It says that I can’t use streaming video or audio… but it seems like most people do. I don’t want to complain about other people, I just don’t want to get in trouble. Is this right?” > > Boss: “Uh, what? It says that?” (Note: Boss is IT Director) > > Me: “Yes, let me show you.” > > Boss: “Oh, we wrote that a long time ago. We didn’t have much bandwidth then. Go ahead and ignore that. I’ll let you know if there’s any problem going forward, but you seem to be fine about getting your work done.” > > Me: “Okay, great, thanks!” Maybe I’ve worked in QA for too long, but I would have asked to have the handbook updated… then again, I’m often the person who updates those damn manuals people don’t read. (Thanks for reading yours) ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/150 "2011-10-13T16:09:02Z")
Something’s been bothering me about the insurance incident, and I just realized what it is: when he said he’d filled out enough of it or whatever, it suggests that he filled out as much of it as he’s been filling out for awhile. You’re only recently supervising him: do you think his normal supervisor requires a complete insurance form and he’s trying to con you, or do you think this normal supervisor doesn’t require a complete insurance form and he’s expecting that policy hasn’t changed just because his supervisor has? If the former, then yeah, get him out of there. But the latter seems likelier to me: he was just telling you (cockily, to be sure) what was expected of him re: paperwork. And then you’ve got a totally different issue. Either his normal supervisor is correct, in which case you should give him a mea culpa and not require him to do useless work (assuming filling out the extra fields is unnecessary); or, if the unfilled-out-fields are necessary, you need to check both with his normal supervisor and with everyone else that person supervises on insurance, and you need to go back over insurance paperwork for the last relevant time-period, because it’s going to be full of errors. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/151 "2011-10-13T16:12:50Z")
> [@Foxy40](#): > > We have a company that I have set up an account with that allows people to shop with a signed authorization and have the repayment payroll deducted. When I worked in a scrub shop, we had some accounts like that and some that would buy your first couple sets of scrubs that had to be a certain color/print but could be in whatever style you wanted, so long as it was under $X or you paid any overage yourself. Near as I could tell you had to have those things bought before starting work, though–do you guys make any dress-code exceptions the first two days, before someone can take advantage of your payroll-deduction program? And on a totally tangential note, do you have any opinions on scrubs vs. business casual wear for a very small medical office? I’ve taken a job with an ophtho clinic that will open early next year, and this is something that’s been a matter of discussion–all scrubs, all business-casual, staff choice either/or, etc. I can see arguments for and against all possible routes, but I’ve never seen anything but all-scrubs actually play out. ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/152 "2011-10-13T16:15:35Z")
If it was just the sneakers and the chair, and these were the only requests the guy ever made, I wouldn’t be calling him a snowflake either. But from the OP it seems pretty clear that this guy has been making a nuisance out of himself from the start. Not in a malicious way, but I’ve met the type and they constantly need their hands held, they get hung up on details to the point where they lose sight of the big picture, and they really don’t understand that it’s not all about them. Also he doesn’t strike me as Employee of the Month material-filling out insurance paperwork wrong in a medical clinic? Yipe. And saying it’s “good enough” when the boss tells you to do it over? Double yipe. As for the chair, I wouldn’t have let him bring in his schmancy executive chair. It would look totally out of place in a clinical setting, the employees don’t sit constantly, and if it’s uncomfortable Foxy mentioned that she’s willing to provide ergonomic padding. That’s on top of the fact that in every office there is at least one whiner who will whine about Jimmy being able to have his big leather chair while s/he’s stuck sitting on a piece of crap. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/153 "2011-10-13T16:40:01Z")
_Light-up sneakers_? You mean the ones that were popular back in the eighties…with seventh graders? ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/154 "2011-10-13T16:43:19Z")
The only thing that would make it more precious is if they’re the air-pump kind, too. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/155 "2011-10-13T16:44:20Z")
> [@fluiddruid](#): > > I don’t think the employee’s request is totally defensible, I personally just object to the attitude that anyone who asks for something not 100% in line with policy is some kind of a special snowflake. In particular, I could totally see a normal employee going “Hmm. I find this chair really uncomfortable. I don’t want to try to ask the company to buy me a chair. Wait! I have one at home!” … and then being completely crestfallen when being told not only that you can’t do it, but you’re a bad employee for even daring to ask. That’s just not a healthy work environment. I don’t think Foxy’s wrong in saying no, but what I object to is the tacit dismissal of someone daring to even ask. 😕 Where on earth are you _getting_ that? > [@Foxy40](#): > > The first questions: “Even though I know it doesn’t comply with dress code, can I wear the new tennis shoes I bought to work from now on.” > > A: “No.” > > The second question: “My father has an executive high back chair he doesn’t need anymore, can I bring it in and use it.” > > Q: “Do you have a medical problem?” > > A: “No, I just like it” > > A: “In that case, not unless you plan to get one for the two other people you share an office with because that really wouldn’t be fair.” Where do you see “tacit dismissal” and making him feel bad for even asking? Why is everyone posting things along the lines of “well, _I_ would have asked and not just dismissed him purely for asking the question, maybe he needed it for a medical reason!” when **Foxy** did just that? Medical reasons are _good_ reasons! Nobody’s suggested otherwise. But he didn’t have one! She didn’t dismiss him out of hand! He’s not a special snowflake merely because he asked, he’s a special snowflake because he thought he could be exempted from the rules **on whim**. I’m really, really baffled at everyone who’s insisting on reading things into **Foxy** ’s actions and motives that just…aren’t there. ---
**Author:** ![Foxy40](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a9a28c/32.png) [@Foxy40](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Foxy40)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/156 "2011-10-13T16:44:29Z")
> [@CrazyCatLady](#): > > When I worked in a scrub shop, we had some accounts like that and some that would buy your first couple sets of scrubs that had to be a certain color/print but could be in whatever style you wanted, so long as it was under $X or you paid any overage yourself. Near as I could tell you had to have those things bought before starting work, though–do you guys make any dress-code exceptions the first two days, before someone can take advantage of your payroll-deduction program? > > And on a totally tangential note, do you have any opinions on scrubs vs. business casual wear for a very small medical office? I’ve taken a job with an ophtho clinic that will open early next year, and this is something that’s been a matter of discussion–all scrubs, all business-casual, staff choice either/or, etc. I can see arguments for and against all possible routes, but I’ve never seen anything but all-scrubs actually play out. Our policy is that clerical workers have a choice of business attire or medical attire. Clinicians such as PAs and NPs can wear business attire with the lab coat provided with our logo or scrubs. Most chose scrubs and the reason is that they are easier, more comfortable, and less expensive. Some PAs and NPs that assist in surgery wear scrubs on those days and business attire on the days they are seeing patients. I have some departments that some wear medical attire and some business such as my billing department. Myself, I only wear business attire. My opinion, give the clerical people the choice but medical personnel wearing medical attire looks more professional and is more practical due to the occasional bodily fluid mishap. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![fluiddruid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c2a13f/32.png) [@fluiddruid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fluiddruid)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/157 "2011-10-13T16:49:11Z")
> [@Bosstone](#): > > 😕 > > Where on earth are you _getting_ that?Where do you see “tacit dismissal” and making him feel bad for even asking? Why is everyone posting things along the lines of “well, _I_ would have asked and not just dismissed him purely for asking the question, maybe he needed it for a medical reason!” when **Foxy** did just that? I was addressing the greater discussion, not Foxy specifically. Several people in this thread have been very dismissive of a new employee daring to ask. For example: > [@](#): > > My response is: > “You are constantly coming into my office with ideas about how our company can help you or do something for you.” Just once I would like to see you walk into this office with an idea about how YOU can do something to help out our company. I think you need to revise your thought processes when you are at work". “And, NO to the shoes, NO to the chair”. > [@](#): > > Not to mention that he is a new hire asking for these special exemptions. Maybe after he had been at the job for a year or six months and gotten a feel for the company culture, he would have an idea about how his requests would be taken. At this point, he just wants what he wants, in spite of knowing that there is a company code that he apparently doesn’t think applies to him. I’m not doubting Foxy specifically. The guy sounds like a tool. I just hate this attitude and I’ve encountered it professionally. ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/158 "2011-10-13T16:49:55Z")
In college I had a few classes with a woman who worked 3rd shift in a hospital lab and had to come right to class afterward (don’t know how she did it without collapsing from exhaustion). She always joked about bringing her work home with her because her scrub tops tended to look a little… messy. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/159 "2011-10-13T17:01:55Z")
> [@fluiddruid](#): > > I was addressing the greater discussion, not Foxy specifically. Several people in this thread have been very dismissive of a new employee daring to ask. For example: > > I’m not doubting Foxy specifically. The guy sounds like a tool. I just hate this attitude and I’ve encountered it professionally. All right, fair enough. (Though I do admit I internally react to a new hire asking odd stuff the same way, but I try to tamp that down and deal with the question on its own merits.) I misunderstood due to > [@](#): > > I don’t think Foxy’s wrong in saying no, but what I object to is the tacit dismissal of someone daring to even ask. That sounded like you were keeping it to **Foxy** ’s situation rather than the broader discussion. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2011, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333/160 "2011-10-13T18:33:14Z")
> [@Foxy40](#): > > My opinion, give the clerical people the choice but medical personnel wearing medical attire looks more professional and is more practical due to the occasional bodily fluid mishap. :eek: Yeah, body fluid mishaps are the reason I flatly refuse to wear sneakers in a medical setting. That kind of thing does NOT come out of the tongue or lining, no matter how much you scrub. Hoseable clogs with replaceable insoles or bust, baby. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-new-and-i-am-special/599333.md?page=9)