# I am NOT answering the FUCKING door! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 24, 2002, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-not-answering-the-fucking-door/110728 "2002-05-24T23:39:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2002, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-not-answering-the-fucking-door/110728/41 "2002-05-27T15:09:00Z")
Well, that’s just _fucking lovely_, **Scott**. If Jan Brunvand has taught us _anything_ (and since, next to **Cecil** and **Martin Gardner** , he’s one of the GREATS, he has) When one’s neighbor knocks softly on one’s door, waits a few minutes then knocks softly again, then knocks one more time before disappearing, then he was _trying to get your attention because he has an_\* AXE IN HIS BACK!!!\*\*\* (or a cut throat). Had you opened the door when he first knocked, an ambulance could’ve been called. This is a proven fact: see [here](http://www.snopes.com/horrors/madmen/roommate.htm) Murderer. Fenris ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2002, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-not-answering-the-fucking-door/110728/42 "2002-05-27T16:50:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Miss Xanax \* > \*\*Alice: I had admin change my username a couple of days ago so I wouldn’t step on your toes. When I signed up I didn’t use underscores so I didn’t know. . . .:eek: \*\* Hey no worries. I was just wondering if those cloning experiments that I’d participated in for bonus credit had been more successful than the researchers originally let on… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2002, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-not-answering-the-fucking-door/110728/43 "2002-05-27T17:36:01Z")
**Fenris** - your link isn’t working for me. Could you pwease try again? 🙂 Anyways, **Scott** , personally I am of the belief that if you had said “Who EEZ it?” he would have been all “this is the VIPER” and you’d have been “Oh sweet jesus” and then you’d have gone online typing out your troubles. And then, he’d come back and you’d say, “Um…now who is it?” and he’d be all, “it’s the VIPER” and this time he’d be turning the doorknob. And you’d be too scared to lock it…so you’d hide. And then FINALLY he’d open the door and come in and you’d say (because, I don’t know, you have no short term memory), “Oh for the love of GOD, who is it?” and he’d say, “This is the viper, i’ve come to vipe the vindows.” And then he’d gut you or something, I don’t know. ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2002, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-not-answering-the-fucking-door/110728/44 "2002-05-27T19:16:07Z")
The link goes to [http://www.snopes.com/horrors/madmen/roommate.htm](http://www.snopes.com/horrors/madmen/roommate.htm) but it has a \ at the end that needed to be removed for it to work as a link. Just look in the status bar when you hover over a link and most problems will be apparent (like that html tag, or a comma or period at the end of the url) ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2002, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-not-answering-the-fucking-door/110728/45 "2002-05-27T19:20:37Z")
Ah, thanks again, **OpalCat**. Yes, **Scott** , you definitely want to open that door about now. I mean, it’s been three days. I’m curious- DID he want to murder you, or did he just need a cup of kibble for the casserole or something? ---
**Author:** ![Gadarene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47c2d/32.png) [@Gadarene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gadarene)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2002, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-not-answering-the-fucking-door/110728/46 "2002-05-27T20:01:42Z")
**Zoggie:** Funniest post ever. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-not-answering-the-fucking-door/110728.md?page=2)