# I am officially an old fart **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 7, 2018, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-officially-an-old-fart/815605 "2018-06-07T13:56:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-officially-an-old-fart/815605/41 "2018-07-10T17:42:51Z")
> [@D\_Anconia](#): > > When people call me Mr. Lastname, I always turn around looking for my Father! You’re not _that_ old if you’re still doing that! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-officially-an-old-fart/815605/42 "2018-07-10T21:34:18Z")
I think my father had his ‘old fart’ realization when my sister finally convinced him to go out to a movie with her. He hadn’t been to see a movie in probably 40 years. As they walked in, he leaned over and told her “Ask the usher to seat us in the loges so I can smoke.” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-officially-an-old-fart/815605/43 "2018-07-10T21:42:51Z")
> [@DCnDC](#): > > Last summer (or was it the summer before that?) I actually yelled at a kid to get off my lawn. He and his family walk past my house every day and apparently he didn’t like my zombie gnomes and would run onto the lawn to knock them down. He was only maybe 5 and I felt bad afterwards, but I just do not abide people, of any age, messing with my gnomes! Pity you couldn’t collude with his parents to set up the gnome staring into his bedroom window at night. ---
**Author:** ![Spud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spud/32/347_2.png) [@Spud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spud)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2018, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-officially-an-old-fart/815605/44 "2018-07-10T23:20:47Z")
> [@Shoeless](#): > > I heard that a lot of older people are buying cars like the Charger, Challenger, Mustang, Camaro, etc because they have larger doors and they’re easier to get in and out of? > > It drives me crazy when I get stuck behind some old fart driving a muscle car and going 10 mph under the speed limit! From a mid to late 50’s driver of a Mustang GT Convertible… yes they have larger doors, but they are actually harder to get in and out of than regular sized doors. If you have nobody parked next to you sure you can open them wide up, but in most parking lots you have a car on either side so really you can open it up very far so you end up twisting around to get your foot out the thin gap. Also the seats are lower so not really an issue getting in but getting out isn’t that hard but definitely isn’t easier. And, trust me… I will never be caught going 10 under the speed limit. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2018, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-officially-an-old-fart/815605/45 "2018-07-12T14:05:34Z")
Lets see, a few years ago, I was at the gym when a incredibly hot girl walked up to me. With complete respect she asked, “Sir, are you using that bench?” The “sir” aged me. And a few nights ago noticed that next to my bed I now keep some Tums, some ibuprofen and some cough drops. I realized I had a middle-aged bedroom. ---
**Author:** ![brainstall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@brainstall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brainstall)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2018, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-officially-an-old-fart/815605/46 "2018-07-12T14:14:38Z")
I took the senior discount at the thrift store. You only have to be 55 to qualify, but still… ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2018, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-officially-an-old-fart/815605/47 "2018-07-12T22:11:02Z")
When I when the lottery I will buy a 1969 Buick Wildcat four door hardtop and have it professionally restored to all its former glory. Best damn car I ever owned and I want it back; I’m now 78 and probably will not live long enough to have the work done if I do win the lottery. ---
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2018, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-officially-an-old-fart/815605/48 "2018-07-13T02:06:11Z")
I regularly get called “sir” and I’m a 33-year-old woman. ---
**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2018, 12:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-officially-an-old-fart/815605/49 "2018-07-13T12:02:00Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > I think my father had his ‘old fart’ realization when my sister finally convinced him to go out to a movie with her. He hadn’t been to see a movie in probably 40 years. As they walked in, he leaned over and told her “Ask the usher to seat us in the loges so I can smoke.” 😃 Speaking of old farts and movies… My wife and I see a movie in the theaters maybe once or twice a year these days. (Usually one of the latest superhero movies.) Last summer my stepson took us to see Wonder Woman. We were supposed to meet him at the theater, and started to get a little concerned as the start time approached and he wasn’t there yet, and he was supposed to be buying the tickets. Plus we were worried about being able to find three good seats together that late. He walked in with minutes to spare, went up to the ticket taker and waved his phone, then showed us to the three reserved seats he had purchased online. I guess that’s how the kids are doing movies nowadays! (And when did they put La-Z-Boy recliners in all the movie theaters?) ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2018, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-officially-an-old-fart/815605/50 "2018-07-13T16:13:41Z")
^ Pfft! Some theaters have actual dinners brought out to you (and cocktails?). [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-officially-an-old-fart/815605.md?page=2)