# I am sick of slut shaming through school dress codes **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 11, 2014, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834 "2014-04-11T00:34:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/101 "2014-04-11T21:04:40Z")
> [@Pedro](#): > > No, that’s not what I said. You even quoted me explaining that. Deal with it = handle it. People don’t say “deal with it” as an idiom for “find a way to handle it”, IME. They say it as shorthand for “get over it.” But of course now you’ve explained that you meant the former, so _of course_ I will now believe that’s what you meant all along. > [@](#): > > Sexist pig! What’s _sexist_ about asking if you work construction? ---
**Author:** ![Pedro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/919ad9/32.png) [@Pedro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pedro)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/102 "2014-04-11T21:14:51Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > People don’t say “deal with it” as an idiom for “find a way to handle it”, IME. They say it as shorthand for “get over it.” > > But of course now you’ve explained that you meant the former, so _of course_ I will now believe that’s what you meant all along. Oh so now you are going to call me a liar too because you misconstrued my meaning over your biases? You’re a fun guy! FYI, catcalling is not harassment. It’s an hilarious ego booster that without fail leads to very satisfying intercourse. Staring, on the other hand, is not funny at all. It’s just hypnotic to women and leaves them in a state of wild sexual arousal. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/103 "2014-04-11T21:24:10Z")
> [@Pedro](#): > > Oh so now you are going to call me a liar too because you misconstrued my meaning over your biases? Hey, I said _of course_ I now have to believe that’s what you meant all along. Why can’t you take _me_ at _my_ word? > [@](#): > > FYI, catcalling is not harassment. It’s an hilarious ego booster that without fail leads to very satisfying intercourse. > > Staring, on the other hand, is not funny at all. It’s just hypnotic to women and leaves them in a state of wild sexual arousal. …oh, because you’re a stupid fuckhead who thinks they’re funny, when they’re actually just a shitstain who gets off on being antifeminist. Because that’s soooo edgy. Alrighty then. ---
**Author:** ![Pedro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/919ad9/32.png) [@Pedro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pedro)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/104 "2014-04-11T21:29:29Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > …oh, because you’re a stupid fuckhead who thinks they’re funny, when they’re actually just a shitstain who gets off on being antifeminist. Because that’s soooo edgy. Alrighty then. Heh… Whatever. That works for me too. Good luck in working through your unresolved issues. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/105 "2014-04-11T21:41:21Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > I’d rather they have the freedom to wear bikinis than be restricted to burqas. If only there were another option. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/106 "2014-04-11T21:42:17Z")
Weird, you don’t often see posters with more than 10 years under their belt going full troll. Ah, well, it takes all sorts. ---
**Author:** ![Pedro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/919ad9/32.png) [@Pedro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pedro)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/107 "2014-04-11T21:48:50Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > Weird, you don’t often see posters with more than 10 years under their belt going full troll. > > Ah, well, it takes all sorts. It was a great run too, but now you’ve scared me with your progressive thinking and frothing at the mouth, so I’m just backing away very, very slowly… ---
**Author:** ![Bozuit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/edb3f5/32.png) [@Bozuit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bozuit)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/108 "2014-04-11T23:06:22Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > Yep, my daughters. > > I’m uncomfortable around gay people, is it ok if they just aren’t gay around me? I mean, they can be gay, just not act it. You know, like they do. They should act straight. When they act gay around me, they exercise a power over me, and that isn’t fair. You could make that analogy. But then I could make the analogy of a guy waving his dick at some women and get all indignant that, yet again, society has decided that the feelings of uncomfortableness experienced by the women trump the man’s desire to express himself. But then where would we be? That aside, asking women and girls not to wear leggings isn’t really the same as telling them not to act like they’re female, so the “don’t act gay around me” analogy doesn’t really work. ---
**Author:** ![jimbuff314](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c57346/32.png) [@jimbuff314](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jimbuff314)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/109 "2014-04-11T23:21:50Z")
I’ve read that mountain gorillas, despite appearance, are relatively docile creatures. Just don’t want to see any more primates getting dragged through the mud about this issue than need be. ---
**Author:** ![lorene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/65b543/32.png) [@lorene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorene)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2014, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/110 "2014-04-11T23:49:20Z")
> [@jimbuff314](#): > > I’ve read that mountain gorillas, despite appearance, are relatively docile creatures. > Just don’t want to see any more primates getting dragged through the mud about > this issue than need be. _Thank you_. This was getting a little too gorilla-ist for my liking. I found it distracting. ---
**Author:** ![jimbuff314](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c57346/32.png) [@jimbuff314](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jimbuff314)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2014, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/111 "2014-04-12T00:24:52Z")
Actually, I did have something else to add about the issue as well, but the edit timed out on me and now I don’t remember what the hell it was (got called away on a emergency deal). Also, check post #98 where **Vinyl Turnip** drags mountain gorillas into the conversation and then #100 where **magellan** literally reports laughing at them. So there. ---
**Author:** ![Crazyhorse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crazyhorse/32/31_2.png) [@Crazyhorse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crazyhorse)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2014, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/112 "2014-04-12T00:26:42Z")
And among mountain gorillas when a female reaches sexual maturity and begins her estrus cycle the boys just have to deal with it dammit. Oh wait, no. Actually they have sex with her. But the point remains. It’s not like wearing tight leggings is akin to a female gorilla displaying her swollen genitalia to the males. Anyway, the point is that if mountain gorillas had schools they would draw the line somewhere too, or maybe they would just have sex during classes. I lost my train of thought. ---
**Author:** ![jimbuff314](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c57346/32.png) [@jimbuff314](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jimbuff314)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2014, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/113 "2014-04-12T00:31:44Z")
But that reminds me what I was going to ask. Do leggings = tights? 'Cause the leggings I remember are from the '80s when ladies would wear these tube things at the bottom of their legs (to keep warm or something). If we’re talking about schoolchildren going to school dressed only in those and a top, I’m afraid I’m going to have to agree that a dress code _might_ be warranted. ---
**Author:** ![jimbuff314](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c57346/32.png) [@jimbuff314](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jimbuff314)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2014, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/114 "2014-04-12T00:39:07Z")
> [@lorene](#): > > _Thank you_. This was getting a little too gorilla-ist for my liking. I found it distracting. Also, **lorene** , I see that this is your first post in the thread. Thank _you_ for going the extra mile in keeping me on my toes. ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2014, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/115 "2014-04-12T01:50:43Z")
I agree that making a dress code about boy’s supposed inability to control themselves is a bad scene. But I am sympathetic to teachers who just want to teach, and don’t want to also have to play referee at the circus. If a school wants a dress code, I think they should focus on something like “business casual” dress. That’s much more sensible that keeping the shameless Jezebels from leading the boys asttray. I do, however, think that leggings don’t fall in to this catagory. I personally agree with the idea that leggings are hoisery, not clothing. But I have to admit that I’m in the same position as the oldsters in the 60s arguing that long hair was for girls, or the oldsters even further back arguing that women in trousers was obscene. Like it or not, leggings are now considered, on their own, acceptable to wear alone. > [@Starving\_Artist](#): > > Exactly! It’s the girls who are deliberately dressing in a sexually provocative manner who are objectifying and sexualizing _themselves_. What’s the point of a girl “expressing herself” in sexually provocative ways if the intent isn’t to appeal to boys’ prurient interests? > > But then, of course, when those interests become problematic, it’s the boys who are at fault for “sexualizing and objectifying” women. :rolleyes: Believe it or not, women do not focus every thing they do around men. Women choose what they wear for many reasons, and in my experience (having been a woman for several decades), “attracting attention from random men” is rarely something we give consideration to. We may want to attract a specific man. We may be trying to impress our female peers. We may be following our own sense of fashion or we may be just trying to stay comfortable. But yeah, there are lots of reasons to wear skimpy clothes that don’t revolve around you. When I was in high school, I was always getting sent home for wearing my favorite dress- a Hawaiian print floor length maxi dress with a halter top in lime green that I got from a Melrose Ave thrift shop. I didn’t find it particularly revealing, but I guess my teachers did. I liked it because it was unusual and fun. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2014, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/116 "2014-04-12T02:05:18Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > Believe it or not, women do not focus every thing they do around men. Women choose what they wear for many reasons, and in my experience (having been a woman for several decades), “attracting attention from random men” is rarely something we give consideration to. We may want to attract a specific man. We may be trying to impress our female peers. We may be following our own sense of fashion or we may be just trying to stay comfortable. But yeah, there are lots of reasons to wear skimpy clothes that don’t revolve around you. Ok, but we aren’t talking about men and women here. We’re talking about teenage boys and teenage girls. They’re barely human. ---
**Author:** ![OurLordPeace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e8c25b/32.png) [@OurLordPeace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OurLordPeace)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2014, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/117 "2014-04-12T02:21:24Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Ok, but we aren’t talking about men and women here. We’re talking about teenage boys and teenage girls. They’re barely human. I know you’re joking, but that’s ageist and not funny. ---
**Author:** ![OurLordPeace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e8c25b/32.png) [@OurLordPeace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OurLordPeace)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2014, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/118 "2014-04-12T02:24:31Z")
To elaborate: those kinds of perceptions color and affect the way adults deal with these kinds of issues. The boys and girls deserve better. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2014, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/119 "2014-04-12T02:27:20Z")
> [@OurLordPeace](#): > > I know you’re joking, but that’s ageist and not funny. Ageist?!?! Really? Again, we’re talking about teenagers. Actually I do think they act the way they do because of the way they are treated by adults. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2014, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834/120 "2014-04-12T03:06:22Z")
> [@OurLordPeace](#): > > I know you’re joking, but that’s ageist and not funny. I deal with this age group every day in the classroom. It is 100% accurate. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-sick-of-slut-shaming-through-school-dress-codes/685834.md?page=7)