# I am someone's "One Eye-brow Baby"

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-someones-one-eye-brow-baby/742136>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [January 4, 2016, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-someones-one-eye-brow-baby/742136 "2016-01-04T05:54:41Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 6\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\
**Post date:** [January 4, 2016, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-someones-one-eye-brow-baby/742136/1 "2016-01-04T05:54:41Z")

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Last night of the cruise, having a drink and saying my goodbyes to the people that enabled my drunkenness for the last 2 weeks and came across a guy who greets me with, _“I fuckin’ hate you! You always beat me at everything!”_

Lots of trivia games and ring-toss and shit on board to occupy the masses. I did them all, being that kind of guy. So did he, apparently.

Well, as established by fact, I was a consistant second place in nearly everything )meaning, LOSER!), but this guy was pissed at ME!

So, I did something awful:

[spoiler] I saw he had the “unlimited drinks” sticker on his cruise card. I convinced him that if he bought me a drink, he would be the winner, having the upper hand in the booze department! 😃

He did. We’re pals now.

[/spoiler]

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**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\
**Post date:** [January 4, 2016, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-someones-one-eye-brow-baby/742136/2 "2016-01-04T06:03:14Z")

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You sir, are a diplomat. Well done. Is there any problem drinking can’t solve?

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**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\
**Post date:** [January 4, 2016, 6:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-someones-one-eye-brow-baby/742136/3 "2016-01-04T06:50:59Z")

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His name is [Gerald](http://simpsons.wikia.com/wiki/Gerald_Samson).

I hate you because you’re a catfish and you’re a pain in the ass to clean. Can I get my free drink now?

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**Author:** ![Dr.Drake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Dr.Drake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Drake)\
**Post date:** [January 4, 2016, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-someones-one-eye-brow-baby/742136/4 "2016-01-04T17:42:01Z")

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> [@thelurkinghorror](#):
>
> I hate you because you’re a catfish and you’re a pain in the ass to clean.

God damn it, I’ve been reading this as **Gatoescapado** for years now.

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**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\
**Post date:** [January 6, 2016, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-someones-one-eye-brow-baby/742136/5 "2016-01-06T04:58:01Z")

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I only posted that to use up my free internet on that goddamn barge. I got it down to 3 minutes left!

Second Place! Some other asshole got down to Zero!

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**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\
**Post date:** [January 6, 2016, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-someones-one-eye-brow-baby/742136/6 "2016-01-06T05:02:40Z")

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I’ve never felt so bad for getting a free drink.