# I am torn.... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 12, 2003, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-torn/187880 "2003-07-12T02:07:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![LolaCocaCola](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7cd45c/32.png) [@LolaCocaCola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LolaCocaCola)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-torn/187880/1 "2003-07-12T02:07:51Z")
between two countries… I am not sure if this is the right forum, but I really need some sage pearls of wisdom here… I grew up in Australia - I spent my formative years there…my parents (divorced) are there (they’re not getting any younger - my mum’s 65) I LOVE LOVE LOVE Australia - I had the BEST time on my trip there last year - what an AMAZING country and people… My problem is I also LOVE LOVE LOVE New York, I have an awesome new job here, with amazing potential… (and of course, friends here and all over the US)… I really want to be in two places at one time, but I can’t…and it’s not like Australia is a 7 hour flight from here like Europe… My mum would love nothing more than to see me move home, but I have a life here…yet, I am sure I would love living in Australia, too…it’s just, that NY gets in yer blood, ya know… _sigh_ Anyway, I am rambling… I guess I will figure it out… ---
**Author:** ![Eilsel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c68b51/32.png) [@Eilsel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eilsel)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-torn/187880/2 "2003-07-12T02:27:51Z")
You have to do what’s best for you. Your parents will understand. ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-torn/187880/3 "2003-07-12T02:35:28Z")
Just a thought **Lola** - can you create yourself a career that puts you in New York for long stretches and then requires you to be in Australia for stretches as well? ---
**Author:** ![LolaCocaCola](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7cd45c/32.png) [@LolaCocaCola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LolaCocaCola)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-torn/187880/4 "2003-07-12T03:31:17Z")
Thank you, guys… I know my problem seems minimal in the big scheme of things in the world…but my mum is missing me terribly…and I miss her, but I am more used to being away from home. Thanks, **Ringo** , I am a firm believer if you put your feelers out there, you can create your own perfect reality… ---
**Author:** ![Billdo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/billdo/32/315_2.png) [@Billdo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Billdo)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-torn/187880/5 "2003-07-12T12:14:12Z")
I know what you mean, sorta. I’ve lived in New York my whole life, but in my one short visit to Australia I could really see the beauty of the land and the warmth and humor of the people. New York is rather addictive, though. Speaking of which, we’ve gotta get you hooked up with the rest of the NY Dopers. There’s a DopeDinner on [Friday, July 25](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?&threadid=196663) at Cowgirl Hall of Fame (where if Frito Pie doesn’t get you to irrevocably stay in the US, nothing will). Good luck in your choice. ---
**Author:** ![Silentgoldfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@Silentgoldfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silentgoldfish)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-torn/187880/6 "2003-07-12T13:59:43Z")
Actually, having lived extensivly in both places… Other than the temperature and the accents I find Canada and Australian to be pretty much the same. So you can go an hour north instead of 20 hours west if you want :). ---
**Author:** ![Silentgoldfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@Silentgoldfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silentgoldfish)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-torn/187880/7 "2003-07-12T14:00:44Z")
That would be Australia, not Australian. (This typo correction post brought to you by the people against making me look like a tourist in my own country) ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/earl_snake-hips_tucker/32/3269_2.png) [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-torn/187880/8 "2003-07-12T17:23:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by LolaCocaCola \* > **…it’s not like Australia is a 7 hour flight from here like Europe…** Yikes! From what part of Europe? And flying in what? Or did you mean “Australia, unlike Europe, is not a 7 hour flight from NYC.” ---
**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-torn/187880/9 "2003-07-12T17:52:31Z")
**LCC** , if your parents truly love you, then they only want for you to be happy. It matters not where in the world you are or how often you visit them. Please consider getting special phone service so that you can talk with them more frequently. Better yet, see about setting both of your parents up with their own computers so you may chat with them and save tons of money. I am rcurrently reading Neville Shute’s “The Far Country.” With every book I read about Australia, plus my interaction with those fine folk at G’Dope, the more I want to go down under and see your fabulous country. After all, Australia showed the impeccably good taste of hiring a Dane to design their opera house. [grin] Start yourself a “Christmas club” bank account specifically for your trips to Australia. Make sure to go on a regular basis. On your next trip, bring a professional resume and portfolio and see if there are Australian firms that need a stateside agent in New York. Like **Ringo** said, there may be some way to have the best of both worlds. It’s certainly worth investigating. Ta. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-torn/187880/10 "2003-07-12T18:06:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Silentgoldfish \* > \*\*Actually, having lived extensivly in both places… Other than the temperature and the accents I find Canada and Australian to be pretty much the same. So you can go an hour north instead of 20 hours west if you want :). \*\* The main point is that her _mother_ is in Oz. Canada, no matter how nice, just can’t provide that. Any chance Mom will want to move to NY or at least spend a month a year there with you? Haj ---
**Author:** ![LolaCocaCola](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7cd45c/32.png) [@LolaCocaCola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LolaCocaCola)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-torn/187880/11 "2003-07-12T21:48:03Z")
Thanks, everyone. **Billdo** - I am bound to turn up at one of those Doper events - who knows! Maybe it will be that one! **Silentgoldfish** - I have spent lots of time in Canada, and other than old Commonwealth ties, Canada is nothing like Australia, IMHO. And like **Haj** says - it’s not where I grew up or where mummy is. ☹ **Earl** - Yes, that’s what I meant. **Zenster** - My mum always says to me NOT to move home because of her; that is should be my decision. I do have an awesome phone plan to Oz - 8 cents a minute! I call her once a week on average. The good thing is my sister and her hubby will be moving back to Oz from London this year, so at least she will have one daughter there! 🙂 **Haj** - My mum has never been to NYC, and I am not sure I want her to come here. I just don’t think it’s a great “mum-city” - I have suggested we meet half way, like maybe Hawaii! I will see where this new job goes - if it works out well, I will just have to travel home once a year - if I end up not liking it in a year, then I will probably plan a move home for like two years, to see how my New York jones goes. There. I feel better already! 🙂