# I am your better. Do as I say. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 27, 2010, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184 "2010-07-27T14:31:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/21 "2010-07-27T16:24:07Z")
Yeah, **Captain Amazing** , but at least he wasn’t a tourist. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/22 "2010-07-27T16:25:37Z")
> [@Chessic\_Sense](#): > > \ > > But I know I’m not alone when I say that the Metro system is a racist community. But you’re not supposed to _say_ it. The official line is that there is no such thing as racism against white people. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/23 "2010-07-27T16:30:00Z")
> [@Chessic\_Sense](#): > > First of all, I know his name was Jamal because it was on his shirt. Secondly, I don’t know that he was necessarily racist, but a lot of them are. How many Jamals do you know that you can so comfortably generalize?:dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/24 "2010-07-27T16:34:16Z")
Maybe he meant shirt-wearers. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/25 "2010-07-27T16:43:14Z")
> [@Ogre](#): > > What station? And why didn’t you go to the station kiosk with your trouble? It’s been a few years since I lived there, but I seem to remember manned kiosks at just about every Metro station. I assume it’s because the train was leaving in 2 minutes when he got to the station and he didn’t want to risk missing it and waiting 15 minutes for the next one. > [@Freudian Slit](#): > > Yeah, **Captain Amazing** , but at least he wasn’t a tourist. True enough. I’ve been riding the DC metro for 12 years, and tourists are the bane of every commuter’s existence. Seriously, people of the United States, there are other places you can vacation in and take your 50 kid school groups to. And if you’re going to come, stand on the right, at least. ---
**Author:** ![mack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mack)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/26 "2010-07-27T16:45:40Z")
Don’t they have add-a-fare machines within the gates for just this situation? ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/27 "2010-07-27T16:48:49Z")
> [@Ogre](#): > > And why didn’t you go to the station kiosk with your trouble? I did! PTJMEE was working it. I did exactly what an honest citizen would do. I _could have_ easily tailgated my way back out the gate and pretended to have a metro card. I’ve done that before when I accidentally miss my timed slot through the gate. No problem whatsoever. Why didn’t I go to the starting station’s kiosk? Because by the time I was done screwing around with the machines, the train was pulling in. No time. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/28 "2010-07-27T16:49:46Z")
Those fuckers with GEDs don’t deserve to live. I suppose if he was on welfare instead of working, we’d be treated to an earful of that. ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/29 "2010-07-27T16:52:07Z")
Why the hate for tourists? I love tourists! As a NYC resident I am fully aware that the entire reason this city has the museums, restaurants, shows, and events I love is because of the tourists who come here and spend their money in my fair city. In fact the only reason we have such rockin’ public transportation at such a low cost to me is because of all the tourists. Seriously, I can go anywhere in the city at pretty much any time of day or night for less than $90 per month because of the millions of people that spend 4 or 5 days here at a time and pay $2.25 per ride to supplement the MTA cash flow. If you have an issue with tourists in your city please send them here! I would love to have more people pouring their dollars into my local economy even if it does mean I have to wait for a train every now and again. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/30 "2010-07-27T16:54:04Z")
> [@Chessic\_Sense](#): > > Listen carefully. I’m smarter than you, better at my job, and take care of myself better than you do. In other words, I am superior to you. So next time when I tell you I need to put money on the card, you say “OK” and let me do my thing. I, too, have an incredibly large penis. Or, I would if I were male. What if the female equivalent of “My dick is bigger than yours?” Because whatever it is, it’s true. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/31 "2010-07-27T16:55:07Z")
> [@Captain\_Amazing](#): > > True enough. I’ve been riding the DC metro for 12 years, and tourists are the bane of every commuter’s existence. Seriously, people of the United States, there are other places you can vacation in and take your 50 kid school groups to. And if you’re going to come, stand on the right, at least. Well, I was actually being sarcastic because of the OP’s mention of how he was wearing a slacks and a tie instead of a fanny pack. Clearly, jumping the line is a-OK as long as a fanny pack isn’t involved. I think the jury’s still out when it comes to carrying a camera and wearing shorts. ETA: Also, I’m kind of confused as to what the OP wanted the worker to do. The guy clearly couldn’t add money on the train, so why was he telling him instead of asking the station manager? ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/32 "2010-07-27T16:58:17Z")
> [@Chessic\_Sense](#): > > Every day, I take the DC metro train to and from work. For those outsiders, the Metro system isn’t known for its, let’s say, “competence”. There are two ways to pay for the trip- either a paper fare card that you insert into the gate or a RFID card that connects to an online account. Most people use the latter SmarTrip card for various reasons. Well, mine quit working. It wouldn’t read at any of the gates. > > So I had to mail it in for a replacement. It’s supposed to take 3-5 business days to get a new one. It’s been 7 so far. So I’m still using paper cards. > > I go to get on the train today and find that it’ll arrive in 2 minutes. The next one isn’t even on the board yet, so it’ll be at least 15. I insert my paper ticket and it says I don’t have enough money left. Just $1.10 instead of the minimum $1.20 or whatever. > > I run back to the ticket machines. First one- doesn’t accept bills. Second one- fare card slot isn’t working. Third one- says “out of service” which ironically makes it the best working one there. Fourth machine, the greatest malady of all- a flock of tourists. We’re talking 30 or 40 people all trying to use the same machine. > > Train pulls into the station, so I say “screw it” and tailgate someone through the entry gate. I run to the escalators but, of course, there are tourists standing on the wrong side, blocking the walkers. I curtly say “excuse me”, surprised that I could curtail my rage enough to still use polite words, and barely hop on the train, whose doors still manage to smash me as I enter as if to say “fuck you again.” > > Now so far it’s been machines and clueless people that have pissed me off. But then I encounter Power Trip Jamal, Metro Employee Extraordinaire (PTJMEE). I approach him. > > Me - “Excuse me, sir (yes I _did_ say that), the entry gates didn’t take my ticket.” > PTJMEE - “Didn’t take it? You came in with a bad card.” ::snatches my card:: > Me - “No, no, it just doesn’t have enough money on it.” > PTJMEE - “Ah ha! How you get on the train then, hmm?!” > Me - “The machines weren’t working in [starting station].” > PTJMEE - “Ain’t none of the machines broken [there]. I’ve had people come through all day from there and non’a them be saying the machine’s broken.” > Me - \* There are a million explanations for that, dolt.\* > Me - “Yu huh, one’s not taking bills, one’s out of ser-” > PTJMEE - “What you did is called ‘fare evasion’.” > Me - _No shit. That’s why I’m here now._ > Me - “I just need to put more money on the card(, so let me through the gate).” > PTJMEE - “You needed to see the station manager at [start], not do this here. Go put your money in and come back.” > > So I do that, enter the gate, exit the gate, and leave. But PTJMEE, fuck you and your lecture. Do I have a fanny pack and a bottle of water? No. Do I have a suitcase and a map, standing around looking lost? No. Am I wearing slacks and a tie? Yes. I’M NOT A FUCKING TOURIST. Yes, I evaded the fare…because your fucking machines don’t work, as usual. And don’t call me a liar when I tell you so because you know fucking well that those things are pieces of shit. You know your system thinks it does a good job when it goes a week without killing somebody. Here I am, trying to correct the situation and you’re reading me the riot act from your pedestal of moral superiority. > > Listen carefully. I’m smarter than you, better at my job, and take care of myself better than you do. In other words, I am superior to you. So next time when I tell you I need to put money on the card, you say “OK” and let me do my thing. I don’t need to get in a pissing contest over $1.85 with you. I’m not some hood rat that’s trying to get out of paying for my ride. I’m just a guy on his way to work, trying to work with your fucked up system. > > So again, fuck you, your machines, Metro, and all your racist, nose picking, sleeping-on-duty, GED-sporting, power-tripping coworkers. > > Next week, I’m taking the helicopter. I say this as a long-time DC resident. Are you an intern? Because this type of arrogance and “the rules don’t apply to me because I’m awesome” is very common among petulant young men and women who assume that because they have worked in some Big Government Office in Charge of Something Big for a whole two months, they can do anything they want. You jumped a turnstile and blamed it on everyone but yourself. You should have gotten a citation from Metro Police. Next time, stand in the fucking line with everyone else. And get off your high horse, you self-important little shit. ---
**Author:** ![Hawkeyeop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/958977/32.png) [@Hawkeyeop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hawkeyeop)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/33 "2010-07-27T16:58:42Z")
> [@Chessic\_Sense](#): > > I did exactly what an honest citizen would do. After you broke the law, which is kind of the problem. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/34 "2010-07-27T17:00:39Z")
> [@mack](#): > > Don’t they have add-a-fare machines within the gates for just this situation? The add a fare machine is when you go in with your card, but then don’t have enough money on your card to pay the exit fare. So, if you have a $1.50 on your card, and go in, and then at the end of your ride, the fare is $2, you can use the add-a-fare machine to put on the extra 50 cents. The OP just walked through the gate without putting his fare card in, so the card doesn’t have any record of his entry into the system, so it can’t figure out the fare. ---
**Author:** ![woodstockbirdybird](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/woodstockbirdybird/32/7905_2.png) [@woodstockbirdybird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/woodstockbirdybird)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/35 "2010-07-27T17:01:12Z")
Those damn uppity negroes, fucking up the white man’s day yet again. When will appropriate legislation be passed? I bet it’s the liberal PC douches in Congress who are holding it up. ---
**Author:** ![Bridget\_Burke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7cd45c/32.png) [@Bridget\_Burke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bridget_Burke)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/36 "2010-07-27T17:01:35Z")
> [@Captain\_Amazing](#): > > …True enough. I’ve been riding the DC metro for 12 years, and tourists are the bane of every commuter’s existence. Seriously, people of the United States, there are other places you can vacation in and take your 50 kid school groups to. And if you’re going to come, stand on the right, at least. DC Metro was Federally funded; we all paid for it, so we all have the right to use it. If we’re smart enough to figure out the rules, that is. Most tourist days start rather late–if commuters get annoyed, perhaps they ought to leave for work earlier. ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/37 "2010-07-27T17:02:14Z")
> [@mack](#): > > Don’t they have add-a-fare machines within the gates for just this situation? They have the machines, but not for this situation. Those machines are for when you don’t have enough money to exit your gate. That wasn’t my problem. My issue was that I didn’t have enough money to enter the gate. So my ticket wouldn’t work in an exit gate anyway, because it doesn’t “know” where I got on the train, so it doesn’t know what to charge me. You can’t use a ticket to exit if it was never used to enter. > [@pbbth](#): > > Why the hate for tourists? I love tourists! As a NYC resident I am fully aware that the entire reason this city has the museums, restaurants, shows, and events I love is because of the tourists who come here and spend their money in my fair city. In fact the only reason we have such rockin’ public transportation at such a low cost to me is because of all the tourists. Seriously, I can go anywhere in the city at pretty much any time of day or night for less than $90 per month because of the millions of people that spend 4 or 5 days here at a time and pay $2.25 per ride to supplement the MTA cash flow. If you have an issue with tourists in your city please send them here! I would love to have more people pouring their dollars into my local economy even if it does mean I have to wait for a train every now and again. I explicitly said I didn’t hate the tourists, so you can’t have them. They’re a net benefit, but that doesn’t mean there’s no cost. They dump money into the city and give us a reason to have so many museums, restaurants, and shows. But they also get in your way. It’s not their fault, and I signed up for the deal when I moved here, but that doesn’t make it fun to experience. I should mention that this week has been particularly bad with the tourists because the Boy Scouts are in town, and as you know, they move in troops. So you can be standing there in a normal crowd and then all of a sudden, there’s 50 or 60 people pushing onto the platform or into the museum or booking all the restaurant tables. Or worse- trying to navigate Metro. They stare at the ticket machines like they’re robots from the future and they look at [the map](http://wmata.com/rail/maps/map.cfm) like it’s a plate of spaghetti. This morning, I couldn’t get to the only working ticket machine because one such troop was there. I’m not kidding when I say there were 50 people in line. ---
**Author:** ![villa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc79bd/32.png) [@villa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/villa)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/38 "2010-07-27T17:05:03Z")
> [@Ravenman](#): > > I say this as a long-time DC resident. > > Are you an intern? > > Because this type of arrogance and “the rules don’t apply to me because I’m awesome” is very common among petulant young men and women who assume that because they have worked in some Big Government Office in Charge of Something Big for a whole two months, they can do anything they want. Exactly my thought. You just beat me too it. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/39 "2010-07-27T17:08:04Z")
This one time an ATM ate my debit card, so there were those few days I when I had to rely on cash while waiting on my card. In order to get cash, though, I had to go into a branch, so I was all, “Fuck this. I don’t want to wait in line with those fucking chumps.” I just walked into stores and demanded they gave me stuff. “Cut out the lip, toots,” I would say, “I need things now, and I’m not about to wait in any lines or give you a card with any money on it like some two-bit chump.” Bitch shut up and just gave me what I asked for, due to my massive she-penis. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2010, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184/40 "2010-07-27T17:10:01Z")
> [@Chessic\_Sense](#): > > Why didn’t I go to the starting station’s kiosk? Because by the time I was done screwing around with the machines, the train was pulling in. No time. So you’re 15 minutes later than you would otherwise have been. Is this that big a deal that you’re willing to fare jump? I really don’t get this mentality. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-better-do-as-i-say/548184.md?page=3)