# I am your king; you must come and pay homage **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 30, 2019, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739 "2019-03-30T01:40:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2019, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/81 "2019-03-31T01:03:47Z")
> [@PoppaSan](#): > > Not a very good jester if you need to point out your jokes. Shhhh. Don’t say that so loud. I’m a faker. I just want the tiger cub. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2019, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/82 "2019-03-31T02:35:22Z")
> [@simster](#): > > So you would prefer to have your fate decided by majority opinion rather than being ruled by me, whose right to kingship was passed down from ancestors said to be a god and **a mermaid**. Fool! Listen. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony. Well, but you can’t expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you! I mean, if I went 'round saying I was an emperor just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they’d put me away! (boldin’ mine) ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2019, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/83 "2019-03-31T02:41:05Z")
Burpo, you trying to get a job as court historian? There’s no furry pets in that job. You’ll have to take a bird. I know because I’m the nosy busybody in this here kingdom. Oh, and btw, the homage prices have risen since the new monarch had taken over. ---
**Author:** ![VOW](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/vow/32/3043_2.png) [@VOW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VOW)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2019, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/84 "2019-03-31T16:26:52Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Oh, and btw, the homage prices have risen since the new monarch had taken over. _voids another check_ Well, shit…:smack: You may have to wait until payday for me to pay homage. ~VOW ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/85 "2019-04-01T13:25:58Z")
> [@iiandyiiii](#): > > You are hereby made Minister of Catering. The entire Royal Catering Corps is yours! Great! Next time you entertain a certain high level US government offcial, I’ll add something “extra” to his jalapeno dip. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/86 "2019-04-01T14:57:29Z")
The store was fresh out of homages, can I pay you ham sandwiches instead? I’d like to be a foreign ambassador of some sort. Ambassador of Those Tigers That Hang Around **Beck** , maybe? ---
**Author:** ![VOW](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/vow/32/3043_2.png) [@VOW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VOW)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/87 "2019-04-01T18:28:58Z")
BTW, where are the Royal Guardsmen? I’ve got “Snoopy vs The Red Baron” as an earworm now! ~VOW ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/88 "2019-04-01T19:53:14Z")
> [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](#): > > The store was fresh out of homages, can I pay you ham sandwiches instead? > > I’d like to be a foreign ambassador of some sort. Ambassador of Those Tigers That Hang Around **Beck** , maybe? Looky here, the Tigers will be mine. You’re welcome to hang around ‘US’, I’ll be serving dinner to the Cats in a bit. ( heh,heh,heh). ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2019, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/89 "2019-04-01T20:16:23Z")
I can’t live in a world where you have…well…any authority whatsoever…so…viva la revolution! ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2019, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/90 "2019-04-02T01:11:32Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Looky here, the Tigers will be mine. You’re welcome to hang around ‘US’, I’ll be serving dinner to the Cats in a bit. ( heh,heh,heh). I hope you realize that the Tigers are in Detroit. As you will be soon. 4Eyes is not a benevolent King. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2019, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/91 "2019-04-02T01:19:04Z")
Noooooooo! I will not be exiled. King-o-dude help me!! ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2019, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/92 "2019-04-02T04:08:52Z")
> [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](#): > > The store was fresh out of homages, can I pay you ham sandwiches instead? Now I’m confused. I had assumed that homage was the person taking checks. I planned on stiffing homage. I’m certainly not going to leave a tip. The new emperor of Japan named his era “Reiwa” 令和 The first character is most often used to mean “command” but can also mean “good” and “beautiful,” while the second means “peace” or “harmony”. Do we get a new era here? ---
**Author:** ![DorkVader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/73ab20/32.png) [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2019, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/93 "2019-04-02T04:51:09Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > Now I’m confused. I had assumed that homage was the person taking checks. I planned on stiffing homage. I’m certainly not going to leave a tip. Wait a minute. Now, I realize I’m an uninvolved bystander here, but I was kinda hoping to get in on some of the kingly payola that was gonna be handed out. You’re telling me that homie ain’t gonna pay me? That this isn’t one of those roman style bread and circuses kingdoms? WTF man! I was lied to and the system let me down man. I’m throwing my lot in with Oakminster. I may only have sharp sticks, a sock full of doorknobs and harsh language, but…well you know. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2019, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/94 "2019-04-02T05:48:46Z")
Okay, if you want me to transfer my allegiance from Her Most Canadian Majesty, you’re going to have to start getting the appropriate law and the centuries of stifling tradition ready. I may be a monarchist, but I’m a _constitutional_ monarchist. She who reigns, does not rule, and all that. Let the nameless politicians duke it out in the Halls of Power. They can, and will, be replaced. The monarch cruises serenely above, embodying the symbolism and history of the State. [sub]So, can I be Duke of Toronto? :D[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2019, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/95 "2019-04-02T05:50:39Z")
Just give the homage to me. I’ll make sure it gets to the right person… erm, kingly type. I’ll even throw a little kick-back your way. It’ll be okay, I know what I’m doing.😉 ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2019, 8:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/96 "2019-04-02T08:55:18Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Noooooooo! I will not be exiled. King-o-dude help me!! You get to stay. Don’t worry. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2019, 8:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/97 "2019-04-02T08:56:19Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > Okay, if you want me to transfer my allegiance from Her Most Canadian Majesty, you’re going to have to start getting the appropriate law and the centuries of stifling tradition ready. I may be a monarchist, but I’m a _constitutional_ monarchist. She who reigns, does not rule, and all that. Let the nameless politicians duke it out in the Halls of Power. They can, and will, be replaced. The monarch cruises serenely above, embodying the symbolism and history of the State. > > [sub]So, can I be Duke of Toronto? :D[/sub] You are hereby made Duke of Toronto. ---
**Author:** ![VOW](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/vow/32/3043_2.png) [@VOW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VOW)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2019, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/98 "2019-04-02T13:45:41Z")
> [@guestchaz](#): > > I may only have sharp sticks, a sock full of doorknobs and harsh language, but…well you know. Did you know you can make bombs with common household chemicals, in the right proportions? ~VOW ---
**Author:** ![Jumpbass](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jumpbass/32/147_2.png) [@Jumpbass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jumpbass)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2019, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/99 "2019-04-02T14:48:57Z")
> [@VOW](#): > > Did you know you can make bombs with common household chemicals, in the right proportions? > ~VOW What’s this? Hints from the Royal Heloise? Can I be the minstrel? Here to sooth the royal brow with some rockin’ jams. Maybe I can be the Duke of Earl? I want to join the pantheon for great royal musicians like Count Basie and Duke Ellington. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2019, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739/100 "2019-04-02T14:56:32Z")
> [@Jumpbass](#): > > What’s this? Hints from the Royal Heloise? > > Can I be the minstrel? Here to sooth the royal brow with some rockin’ jams. Maybe I can be the Duke of Earl? I want to join the pantheon for great royal musicians like Count Basie and Duke Ellington. You are hereby made the Royal Minstrel. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-am-your-king-you-must-come-and-pay-homage/831739.md?page=6)