# I burning Christmas toy packaging **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 25, 2009, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579 "2009-12-25T20:15:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2009, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/21 "2009-12-26T08:14:07Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > I don’t understand how having every single little piece of accoutrements wired down like Fort Knox deter shoplifters. I can see locking down the main action figure thingie, but not his helmet, weapons, wristbands, canteen, little black book, etc. > > I shared the OP’s pain today with various Transformer, Hulk and Spiderman presents. Some parents don’t parent. Instead, they let little Bobby and Suzy play in the toy department while they go on to Automotive or Women’s Accessories, or they drop the kids off at a toy store to amuse themselves (AND expect the toy store employees to watch the rug rats, keep them safe, and not let them leave the store) while the parents go do grown up shopping. Suzy and Bobby see the toys, they want to play with the toys, the toys are firmly locked down, so the pwecious widdle angels try to remove the accessories. I’ve never worked in a toy store, but I have worked in retail, and I’ve shopped in toy stores and seen the above behavior. ---
**Author:** ![Shawn1767](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Shawn1767](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shawn1767)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2009, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/22 "2009-12-26T18:38:32Z")
Actually, my theory is marketing and computer-aided design. Back when I was a kid, accessories came in one plastic bag. You couldn’t see all the accessories from looking at the package unless it was on the picture of the box. Now that computers can design the packaging and you can actually SEE all the accessories in the molded plastic clamshell containers or clear plastic protectors, they need a way to hold it all in place as if it’s in a picture. For example, we got this Polly Pocket loft apartment thing this year. It has all the accessories on display and Polly herself in an actual pose as if in the apartment. That’s a marketing thing to show how cool it would look in use. And the computer design for packaging allows them to package the toy as if it were in use. Well, that’s my theory. ---
**Author:** ![torie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/77aa72/32.png) [@torie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/torie)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2009, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/23 "2009-12-26T18:50:20Z")
Tell me about it. I must have opened 600,000 thousand toys yesterday and all of them were packaged like they were going to be shot to the moon and back. Infant toys are the worst. We bought my 8 month old a bunch of light up rattles that all came in that lethally sharp plastic clamshell packaging. My husband and I have hurt fingers but happy kids. Next year, online shopping. I didn’t know Amazon did that. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2009, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/24 "2009-12-26T20:21:00Z")
[Package Shark.](https://www.packageshark.com/) ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2009, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/25 "2009-12-26T20:49:01Z")
> [@Shawn1767](#): > > Actually, my theory is marketing and computer-aided design. Back when I was a kid, accessories came in one plastic bag. You couldn’t see all the accessories from looking at the package unless it was on the picture of the box. Now that computers can design the packaging and you can actually SEE all the accessories in the molded plastic clamshell containers or clear plastic protectors, they need a way to hold it all in place as if it’s in a picture. For example, we got this Polly Pocket loft apartment thing this year. It has all the accessories on display and Polly herself in an actual pose as if in the apartment. That’s a marketing thing to show how cool it would look in use. And the computer design for packaging allows them to package the toy as if it were in use. > Well, that’s my theory. That makes a lot of sense, actually. I have certainly seen toys like action figures and dolls packaged in such a way like you describe. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/26 "2009-12-27T01:05:30Z")
> [@SanibelMan](#): > > I noticed Amazon now offers “frustration-free” packaging, where the item just comes in a plain cardboard box. My dad ordered a Fisher-Price camera for my daughter than came like that. Just the camera, wrapped in plastic, in a cardboard box. No muss, no fuss. I hope it catches on. Yup, I’m a fan of that. I got my sister some earbuds for her Zune via Amazon, and it came in that packaging. Cardboard box, big sticker to hold it closed, little plastic baggies inside. Easy-peasy. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/27 "2009-12-27T01:38:43Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > [Package Shark.](https://www.packageshark.com/) The consumer reporter on our local news did a piece on that…it was sold in the same sort of packaging it’s supposed to open. :dubious: > [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > Children aren’t supposed to grow up with memories of daddy on Chritmas morning trying to gnaw his way into a package of Barbie accessories, saying “open up, you fucking cocksucker, I’ll fucking _melt_ you.” Are you kidding? That would be _awesome_. I have similiar memories – I learned how to swear listening to my dad put the Christmas tree up. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/28 "2009-12-27T01:51:37Z")
I dunno about swearing (well, actually, I do. I do a lot of it opening toys.), but this came close to being the Year Mommy Had to Be Rushed to the Hospital With a Deep Stab Wound. Good times, good times. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/29 "2009-12-27T03:39:31Z")
You gotta smoke them toys out of their dang plastic caves. I ain’t never seen a packaging held up more’n 5 seconds against a simple Bic lighter. Of course, you have to be careful not to charcoal whatever it is that you’re trying to melt from the clamshell (a.k.a. Satan’s buttcheeks) or ultratight CDcase plastic (a.k.a. Satan’s condom), but once the packaging has got at least one fingersize hole in it, you can Neanderthal your way to the prize. Or Stone Age your way through it, if you’re one of those sissy sharp tool users. And if you were to melt or stab right through dear Uncle Joe’s wonderful Xtra Amplified Electronic Drumkit 9000 (ultra long life batteries included), well… who’s to say it weren’t no accident, eh ? ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/30 "2009-12-27T04:23:14Z")
One of my daughter’s toys this year was wired in in no fewer than nine fucking goddamn cockstacking fuck’s sake places. I hasten to add that the goddamned dicksuck fuckface thing retailed for maybe twenty fucking assfuck dollars. I bet half that money went to the wire company. This year an added bit of fun was that instead of just wiring it in and twisting the wire together, they’d wire it in with two wires, and then the wires were twisted in pairs, and then the pairs were twisted together in the direction opposite the twist of the pairs, rendering the motherfucking cockblasting cuntwheeling fucking things impossible to untwist by any living human unless said human had eight fingers on each hand and the capacity to think in five fucking dimensions, for fuck’s sake. I just wanted to give my kid some fun toys. So, as to the OP: fuckin’ right. ---
**Author:** ![HongKongFooey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c4cdca/32.png) [@HongKongFooey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HongKongFooey)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/31 "2009-12-27T04:25:53Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > impossible to untwist by any living human unless said human had eight fingers on each hand and the capacity to think in five fucking dimensions You don’t? :dubious: Fuckin’ weirdo. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/32 "2009-12-27T07:37:46Z")
Waitaminute, you said > [@RickJay](#): > > I just wanted to give my kid some fun toys. But **first** , you said > [@RickJay](#): > > This year an added bit of fun was that instead of just wiring it in and twisting the wire together, they’d wire it in with two wires, and then the wires were twisted in pairs, and then the pairs were twisted together in the direction opposite the twist of the pairs, rendering the motherfucking cockblasting cuntwheeling fucking things impossible to untwist by any living human unless said human had eight fingers on each hand and the capacity to think in five fucking dimensions, for fuck’s sake. Sounds like something a normal kid could have a blast with, to me. ---
**Author:** ![CaveMike](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cavemike/32/16379_2.png) [@CaveMike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CaveMike)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/33 "2009-12-27T22:54:50Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > LOL, really? Fruit in danger of bruising is packaged with less care than infernal toys made in China! > 😃 Fruit? What would happen to a barge full of apples? The fruit acts as its own packing material. ---
**Author:** ![DarrenS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/977dab/32.png) [@DarrenS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarrenS)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2009, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/34 "2009-12-27T23:52:05Z")
Y’know, I dislike frivolous lawsuits as much as the next guy, but this is one case where a painful settlement to a consumer who was injured by military-grade packaging might actually help. Manufacturers would then conclude that it’s cheaper to have sane packaging and retailers complaining to them about shoplifting rather than pay out a few mil to tort lawyers every couple of years. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2009, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/35 "2009-12-28T00:09:46Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > The consumer reporter on our local news did a piece on that…it was sold in the same sort of packaging it’s supposed to open. :dubious: The obvious solution, you see, is to buy a Package Shark, and then another one to open the first Package Shark with. ---
**Author:** ![goldmund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a4c791/32.png) [@goldmund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/goldmund)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2009, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/36 "2009-12-28T03:59:02Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > [Package Shark.](https://www.packageshark.com/) Or, another way to open those stupid plastic packages, and one that most people will already have around the house: a standard, hand-held, manually cranked can opener. Works like a charm. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2009, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/37 "2009-12-28T04:53:54Z")
> [@teletype](#): > > Or, another way to open those stupid plastic packages, and one that most people will already have around the house: a standard, hand-held, manually cranked can opener. Works like a charm. I use my Leatherman. A few years ago, I got it for Christmas… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2009, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/38 "2009-12-28T11:23:00Z")
> [@Count\_Blucher](#): > > I use my Leatherman. A few years ago, I got it for Christmas… 😉 Ooo, ooo, lemme guess what kind of packaging it came in! ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2009, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/39 "2009-12-28T15:36:01Z")
Package Shark is a lightweight. Get one of [these](http://www.enjoyzibra.com/openit/). It has big clippers for cutting through packaging and wire ties, offset to make it easy to snip around the edge. The handle also has a boxcutter-type utility blade for general cutting, and a mini screwdriver for opening battery compartments. This thing is seriously awesome. They sell 'em for about ten bucks at Bed Bath & Beyond, and probably Walgreens and such as well. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2009, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579/40 "2009-12-28T16:36:11Z")
> [@Shawn1767](#): > > Actually, my theory is marketing and computer-aided design. There was something on NPR (or some other public radio show) last week about this packaging, and that’s what they said: it was designed to entice children, so they could see the toy in all its glory and sometimes operate the toy within the packaging. I love the idea of frustration-free packaging, however, and will definitely keep an eye out for that when my little sprout becomes old enough to pine after toys more complicated than a cardboard box. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-burning-christmas-toy-packaging/522579.md?page=3)