# I call it! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 23, 2005, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412 "2005-11-23T13:24:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2005, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/61 "2005-11-26T22:32:12Z")
But, hey…you Jews get circumcised. Ya take away a man’s toys…it’s no wonder he’s pissed at you. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Stamos\_Left\_Ear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_stamos_left_ear/32/3198_2.png) [@John\_Stamos\_Left\_Ear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Stamos_Left_Ear)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2005, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/62 "2005-11-26T22:36:15Z")
> [@Dijon Warlock](#): > > But, hey…you Jews get circumcised. > > Ya take away a man’s toys…it’s no wonder he’s pissed at you. No, it makes it look bigger… (from some movie or TVshow I can’t recall) ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2005, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/63 "2005-11-26T22:48:37Z")
It makes it look _bigger???_ As a non-Jew who was circumcised at birth anyway, I am now horribly ashamed. Reading glasses, anyone? ---
**Author:** ![Sweet\_Mercury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@Sweet\_Mercury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sweet_Mercury)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2005, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/64 "2005-11-26T23:45:01Z")
> [@EJsGirl](#): > > I don’t get it. How can people function in daily life with their minds jammed shut all the time? > > ;j I am prety much convinced that that’s the only way most people can function in their daily lives. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2005, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/65 "2005-11-27T00:01:51Z")
Interesting FYI [American pop icon announces intention to convert to Islam, according to sources in Bahrain](http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3174956,00.html) ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2005, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/66 "2005-11-27T00:21:20Z")
Is he going to start wearing a burka now? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2005, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/67 "2005-11-27T01:21:27Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Is he going to start wearing a burka now? What do you mean start? Hasn’t he been disguising himself as a Muslim woman in full on burqa and/or chador for years? ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2005, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/68 "2005-11-27T02:08:08Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > What do you mean start? Hasn’t he been disguising himself as a Muslim woman in full on burqa and/or chador for years? It’s chowdah! CHOW-DAH! ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2005, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/69 "2005-11-27T03:07:00Z")
> [@astro](#): > > Interesting FYI > > [American pop icon announces intention to convert to Islam, according to sources in Bahrain](http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3174956,00.html) > [@](#): > > Jackson also noted he intends to soon move all his assets and his studio from the U.S. to Bahrain, and expressed his hope to be rid of various legal troubles and enjoy the kind of freedom he says he does not have in America. Oh, yeh, the freedom to… :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2005, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/70 "2005-11-27T03:30:44Z")
Does he even have any assets left? He’s being sued left and right for breach of contract and for falling to pay what he owes. I would imagine any that he does have will be frozen. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2005, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/71 "2005-11-27T03:31:50Z")
Just when you think Jacko’s image couldn’t possibly get any creepier… I’m no Jewish American Princess, but I say, “Oy vey” all the time. By all accounts, that should certainly qualify me for “The Yellow Submarine.” ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2005, 5:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/72 "2005-11-27T05:39:12Z")
Can Michael still qualify to be a Black Muslim? ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2005, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/73 "2005-11-27T23:36:20Z")
> [@Revtim](#): > > Hey, they were “telephone conversations recorded without permission”, so the racism is OK! The guy who recorded it was probably Jewish, too. I mean, who are you going to believe- Michael or your own ears? ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2005, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/74 "2005-11-28T13:09:03Z")
> [@Zoe](#): > > Can Michael still qualify to be a Black Muslim? I am not a muslim, but I’d be real interested in reading the Muslim view on this conversion. ---
**Author:** ![Testy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c37758/32.png) [@Testy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Testy)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2005, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/75 "2005-11-28T14:09:36Z")
> [@Shirley Ujest](#): > > I am not a muslim, but I’d be real interested in reading the Muslim view on this conversion. I’m not either but I used to live in Bahrain. To answer your question, they’ll take him. It will be interesting to see whether he converts to Shia like the vast majority of the Bahrainis, or Sunni like the royal family. If he goes Shia, I want to see him out there whacking himself in the head with a rusty sword and bleeding all over the place. Somehow I think that might be a bit gritty for Michael but I’d drive over tto see it. Regards Testy ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2005, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/76 "2005-11-29T02:31:58Z")
[Jacko-you are NOT the father!](http://contactmusic.com/new/xmlfeed.nsf/mndwebpages/jacksons%20ex%20michael%20is%20not%20the%20natural%20father) I am shocked. Just SHOCKED, I tell you! ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2005, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/77 "2005-11-29T03:03:47Z")
> [@Shirley Ujest](#): > > I am not a muslim, but I’d be real interested in reading the Muslim view on this conversion. IANAMuslim, but as I understand it all Jacko has to do is say “There is no God but God, and Muhammed is His prophet” in Arabic, and he’s a Muslim. No Imam or other authoritry is needed. If Jacko is not already circumcised, he’ll need to get that done. . Personally, I’m curious what Jackson would sound like as a muzzein. You’d get the traditional call to prayer interspersed with “uh-hee-heee!”. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2005, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/78 "2005-11-29T03:36:50Z")
I suppose Islamic scripture will prohibit Michael from giving his “guests” his patented Jesus Juice. I’m sure he’ll find some other way to get into trouble. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2005, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/79 "2005-11-29T03:45:13Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > You’d get the traditional call to prayer interspersed with “uh-hee-heee!”. 😃 And can you imagine his moves during his 5-times-daily prayers? :: \*Lays his prayer mat as he moonwalks backward. Does a quick pirouette, stands on toes, pushes sleeve up. Stands on one foot and waggles other leg in the air. Grabs crotch, bends knees inward, and bobs up and down. Pirouettes again. Throws himself on knees, facing toward Mecca. \* :: ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2005, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412/80 "2005-11-29T17:25:58Z")
> [@](#): > > No, it makes it look bigger… (from some movie or TVshow I can’t recall) Like so many penis-related quips, this comes from South Park, specifically the episode titled “Ike’s Wee-Wee.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-call-it/332412.md?page=5)