# I cannot believe you are actually making a 37 year old man on a business trip kick your ass. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 16, 2010, 9:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625 "2010-05-16T09:14:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2010, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/161 "2010-05-18T20:45:29Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > ook ook ook don’t forget to throw some monkey shit! mr dribble will make a good target ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2010, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/162 "2010-05-18T20:50:27Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > Could it be our boy’s done something rash? Now on the sidewalk, sunny morning, lies a body just oozin’ life. Stranger ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2010, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/163 "2010-05-18T20:54:54Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > I made the same mistake–I thought the OP was female as well. Apparently we’re supposed to pay closer attention to the 60,000 people who post here. :rolleyes: Well no, but of the hundred or so who do most of the posting, maybe? And I thought I was the socially challenged one. :rolleyes: 😛 ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2010, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/164 "2010-05-18T22:45:40Z")
> [@Malacandra](#): > > Well no, but of the hundred or so who do most of the posting, maybe? And I thought I was the socially challenged one. :rolleyes: > > 😛 :rolleyes: 😛😃 right back atcha. Did you hear about Louie Miller? He disappeared… ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2010, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/165 "2010-05-18T23:06:23Z")
Yes. What is odd about the whole disappearance is that it occurred after he withdrew all of his savings. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2010, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/166 "2010-05-18T23:08:08Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > Buncha fucking savages. Beasts - the OP and all his silverback supporters. What the fuck is your problem with my [Silverbacks](http://www.atlantasilverbacks.com/)? Hell, they _won_ Saturday. 10-1-1 now. Top of their division. Sheesh. I bet anyone of those chicks could kick the OP’s ass ---
**Author:** ![RedFury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ec9cab/32.png) [@RedFury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedFury)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2010, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/167 "2010-05-18T23:17:04Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > Don’t make us go all apeshit on your ass… _:::::shakes walker at billfish:::::_ Careful bro’! Don’t go messing with my pal or I’ll smack you over the head with this thing and take all your middle-aged hoes! ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2010, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/168 "2010-05-19T00:52:01Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > Yes. What is odd about the whole disappearance is that it occurred after he withdrew all of his savings. And now ole Mackie spends like a sailor. Could it be our boy’s done something rash? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2010, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/169 "2010-05-19T00:58:31Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > I once shot a man in Reno just to see him die. > > Frankly, it wasn’t worth the trip. That’s funny. Reno is my next stop! (Seriously) > [@Try2B Comprehensive](#): > > I think you/msmith deserve(s) a little more credit. > -I can believe chicks dig him now more than 15 years ago. And his being pleasantly surprised by it. > -He travels around on business trips and hangs out in hotels. Half the wankers in this thread live with their mom. > -Piss him off and he’ll get violent, take your women, then gloat about it. He may or may not bang one or more of them, depending on how drunk/faithful he’s feeling. People don’t like it, but it was fun for him. He got in touch with his inner chest-pounding gorilla! Look, I am a man. I have an ocean of testosterone flowing through my veins. > [@Gyrate](#): > > I’m surprised we haven’t had a “pics or it didn’t happen” post somewhere along the line. “Hey babe. Here’s my Blackberry. Take a picture of me kicking your boyfriend’s ass.” > [@Rand Rover](#): > > Gotta love the SDMB. Some dude nakes a post about his courageous struggle with a strange illness or injury, and the SDMB laps it up. Another dude says he’s physically attractive or makes one dollar over the national median and everyone calls him a liar and a bragging douchebag. Some people are “What should I have done in this situation?” people and others are “Hey! Look what I did!” people I guess. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2010, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/170 "2010-05-19T01:06:48Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > Some people are “What should I have done in this situation?” people and others are “Hey! Look what I did!” people I guess. You didn’t do anything! You just shoved one fucking guy. That’s it. Get over your bad ass self. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2010, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/171 "2010-05-19T01:12:33Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > Well, not really. All it says is that we don’t consider someone being an asshole a sufficient justification for initiating physical violence. > > And that’s fine by me. Seeing as I can’t call the cops on the guy or do anything else to stop the guy from being an asshole, the guy is allowed to be it if he wants. And I reject that. Being an asshole hurts society. [/quote] > [@](#): > > Over what line? Over the line of being an asshole? Absolutely. Over the line of actually starting a fistfight? No. Why the hell are they different? What is the point of judging someone to be an asshole if you can’t do anything about it? > [@](#): > > If I saw a guy in a bar punch another guy for laughing at him, even for laughing at him in a deliberately nasty and assholish way, I would not be thinking “Oh good, that asshole got what was coming to him, three cheers for the guy who punched him”. I’d be thinking “Holy shit, that’s one violent crazy goon over there physically attacking someone for laughing at him, maybe time to leave”. That’s not the question, though. The question is, what if the guy walked up to you, got in your face, fake punched you, then rattled off about how he’s had sex with your daughter and wife several times, talks about how ugly they were, and repeatedly does this, while blocking your way out of the situation. I say he crossed the line, even though he didn’t throw a punch. There is not a single person on this planet that cannot be provoked into a fight. If you are clearly trying to start one, then I think that should count as actually starting it. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2010, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/172 "2010-05-19T01:12:34Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > You didn’t **do anything**! You just \*\*shoved \*\*one fucking guy. That’s it. Get over your bad ass self. Might wanna dig out the old dictionary there. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2010, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/173 "2010-05-19T01:14:34Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > You didn’t do anything! You just shoved one fucking guy. That’s it. Get over your bad ass self. The fact that he didn’t do anything, even though he really wanted to, would be sufficient bragging rights to me. I don’t think I’d have that much restraint while drunk. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2010, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/174 "2010-05-19T01:41:41Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Seeing as I can’t call the cops on the guy or do anything else to stop the guy from being an asshole, the guy is allowed to be it if he wants. And I reject that. Being an asshole hurts society. IMHO, going around punching people for being assholes hurts society worse. Not saying anything against you personally, but I don’t think I trust the average guy-in-a-bar’s asshole-detection threshold to be necessarily calibrated at a reasonable level. The “first punch” criterion, on the other hand, furnishes a nice bright line: namely, don’t use physical violence on anybody unless they use physical violence on you first. Simple to understand and easy to apply. > [@BigT](#): > > What is the point of judging someone to be an asshole if you can’t do anything about it? Should you be entitled to counter **any** behavior that you think is wrong by initiating physical violence? For instance, if you see a mother at the mall screaming insults and profanity at her crying child, should you be able to go over and bitch-slap her for it? Would that tend to improve the situation, in general? There are lots of things that people do that we judge to be wrong but can’t “do anything” to forcibly stop. Our judgements about wrong behavior don’t become pointless just because we’re not allowed to give the offender a spontaneous asswhupping. > [@BigT](#): > > The question is, what if the guy walked up to you, got in your face, fake punched you, then rattled off about how he’s had sex with your daughter and wife several times, talks about how ugly they were, and repeatedly does this, while blocking your way out of the situation. If some slimy asshole is literally physically blocking you from removing yourself from his slimy assholish presence, I certainly think you’re entirely justified in physically trying to push past him. If he physically restrains you or hits you, then he’s the one who started the fight, and I don’t blame you in the least for fighting back. Otherwise…nope. I think you can certainly tell the slimy asshole exactly what you think of his disgusting contemptible gratuitous obscenities, if you want to. (And if I’m in the bar I’ll be happy to tell the asshole what I think of them too.) But I don’t think it’s okay to hit a person who didn’t hit you, no matter how much of a slimy asshole they’re being. > [@BigT](#): > > There is not a single person on this planet that cannot be provoked into a fight. Sure, but that’s all the more reason not to encourage them to succumb to the provocation by saying that it’s okay to hit somebody who didn’t hit you first. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2010, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/175 "2010-05-19T01:44:50Z")
O.K. **msmith537** , I’m going to give you a piece of advice. If you must tell a fight or sex story, it should at least have a fight or sex in it. I’ll give you an example by relating the last fight I was in. Two years ago, I was 34, my girlfriend of the time and I were walking home from the bar. We fell in with one of her neighbors and his cousin who were walking to the same condo complex. It was two by two with my girlfriend and her neighbor in front and me and the guy’s cousin about ten yards behind. We’re all pretty drunk, but the guy’s cousin has also been gobbling xanax all night and he’s fucking crazy. Because my girlfriend is ahead of us, we can’t help but look at her ass. This motherfucker says, and I shit you not, “I want to rape that”. Obviously that pissed me off, so I just _went_ at him. I grabbed him by the neck with my right hand and squeezed the fuck out of his adam’s apple with my thumb while throwing largely innefectual blows with my left. He mirrored me and grabbed me by the neck and we stumbled around off balance. It ain’t the movies and the choreography is ugly. I got him in the leg with my knee and we both went down to the sidewalk in a drunken heap. The ground is a decent place for me because way back in high school I used to wrestle (third in state! 1991). I ended up with my knee in his back while I used both hands to bang his head against the sidewalk. Never broke the skin, but scratched him up pretty good. Neighbor, who I actually like, tries to pull me off his cousin. I’m in a rage and I throw a blind punch backwards and get him across the nose. I still feel a bit guilty about that. Girlfriend pulls me off the guy’s cousin, and I calm down. Girlfriend is _not_ happy that I kicked her neighbors cousin’s ass. Not at all. Neighbor is just wondering “what the fuck was THAT about?!” It ended up all right in the end, well, the next day. Both girlfriend and neighbor found out about what drug addled cousin said after he drove back to Tennessee. Neighbor even gave me a poker set as a way of apology. The thing is, fights aren’t pretty, and they are rarely anything to brag about. * * * That’s a fight story, **msmith537**. Yours is not, which is why everybody is making fun of your posturing. You didn’t fight and you didn’t get laid (for what it’s worth, I didn’t get laid either that night - girlfriend was pissed and we were both pretty damn drunk) Do you see the difference between my story and yours? ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2010, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/176 "2010-05-19T02:09:26Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > Look, I am a man. I have an ocean of testosterone flowing through my veins. All man, as you have proven! Manlier than Chuck Norris and James Bond combined. > [@](#): > > Some people are “What should I have done in this situation?” people and others are “Hey! Look what I did!” people I guess. And some people are all, “Look at the super badass shit I did,” followed the lamest, dumbest pile of shit story I have ever read. ---
**Author:** ![kidneyfailure](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9f8e36/32.png) [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2010, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/177 "2010-05-19T02:10:08Z")
Regardless of the fact that the OP didn’t include an actual fight or anything, I think the biggest difference between the OP story and the story above is that **A Monkey With a Gun** doesn’t make himself out to be mr. fucking cool tough guy in his story. There’s no “I shoved a guy across the room with a drink in my other hand” bullshit in the story above, which is what has caused me to mock the OP so unceasingly. > [@MeanOldLady](#): > > And some people are all, “Look at the super badass shit I did,” followed the lamest, dumbest pile of shit story I have ever read. **MeanOldLady** , have I ever told you that I find your abrasive, acid-tongued (acid-keyboarded?) sense of humor, brutal honesty and cutting sarcasm to be extremely attractive? ---
**Author:** ![Hodiggity1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/da6949/32.png) [@Hodiggity1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hodiggity1)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2010, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/178 "2010-05-19T02:51:49Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > The thing is, fights aren’t pretty, and they are rarely anything to brag about. > > * * * > > That’s a fight story, **msmith537**. Yours is not, which is why everybody is making fun of your posturing. You didn’t fight and you didn’t get laid (for what it’s worth, I didn’t get laid either that night - girlfriend was pissed and we were both pretty damn drunk) > > Do you see the difference between my story and yours? Sorry dude, but that’s a very lame fight story. If I had seen that fight, I would be embarrassed. I’m no street fighter but I can handle myself in a brawl. I’ve also been in situations where I’ve been in situations where I had to balance some level of professionalism with having to physically intervene in a fight. I’m on msmith’s side, and even he realizes his actions were a bit douchey. But you’re in a bar that’s known to have a level of douchiness associated with it. What do you expect? You can say that you wouldn’t go to such places, but a lot of people do at some point in their lives. They can be a lot of fun, but some level of assertiveness is required. The specific action depends on the situation, and in this case msmith handled himself well and ended up disarming the fight situation (again, even he said that he could have handled it better by verbally shooting the guy down). ---
**Author:** ![emcee2k](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7bcc69/32.png) [@emcee2k](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emcee2k)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2010, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/179 "2010-05-19T03:00:34Z")
Wow. I really can’t get over how many people are defending this guy. What the hell is wrong you people? This is a grown man. Shoving and trying to start a fight with someone because he was rude to him. That’s not defending yourself, that’s just being a stupid immature jackass. I really thought this was pretty basic stuff. And then there’s this little write-up: “Yeah, I shoved this guy clear across the room. Totally kicked his ass, had all his women aching for my junk. I had shut them down, though, little lady back home, ya know”. Yeah, I don’t see how that couldn’t be as well received as a sick person, telling about how they’re sick. Yeah, but leave it the SDMB, though. You know, to have compassion. Instead of whatever you call it when you like listening to someone brag like an eighth grader. I think this one ranks right up there with the one about the store owner who shot an unconscious kid in the list of “threads that make me lose a little faith in humanity”. ---
**Author:** ![Hodiggity1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/da6949/32.png) [@Hodiggity1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hodiggity1)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2010, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625/180 "2010-05-19T03:04:52Z")
> [@kidneyfailure](#): > > I think the biggest difference between the OP story and the story above is that **A Monkey With a Gun** doesn’t make himself out to be mr. fucking cool tough guy in his story. There’s no “I shoved a guy across the room with a drink in my other hand” bullshit in the story above, which is what has caused me to mock the OP so unceasingly. > [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > O.K. **msmith537** , I’m going to give you a piece of advice. If you must tell a fight or sex story, it should at least have a fight or sex in it. I’ll give you an example by relating the last fight I was in. > [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > The ground is a decent place for me because way back in high school I used to wrestle (third in state! 1991). > [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > Girlfriend is _not_ happy that I kicked her neighbors cousin’s ass. > [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > That’s a fight story, **msmith537**. Yours is not That sounds like bragging to me. Don’t make it out to be something it’s not. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cannot-believe-you-are-actually-making-a-37-year-old-man-on-a-business-trip-kick-your-ass/539625.md?page=10)