# I can't bring my lip gloss on the plane, but I can bring my corkscrew? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 31, 2006, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887 "2006-08-31T06:31:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887/1 "2006-08-31T06:31:26Z")
No, seriously. As I mentioned in another thread over in IMHO, I’ll be going to Washington DC in two weeks (BTW- thank you to all of you that offered your advice! As a quick update: we have our hotel booked, I got a great rate at the Renaissance Marriott on 9th). Being the wise little squirrel that I am, I figured that it might be a good idea to take a looksie at the TSA website and figure out what the heck I can and can’t take with me. Naturally, I simply cannot take my tube of MAC _Lilacrush_ lip gloss. After all, if I - at any time during a flight - apply that pale pinkish purple shine to my lips. . . the terrorists will kill 400 orphans. With planes. And snakes. And crack will probably some how be involved. I suppose I can understand the whole lipgloss thing- I mean, it’s sort of a liquid and liquids blow things up. Or so I’m told. Anywho, looking down the list I see something that sort of pisses me off. [Taken right from the TSA page (with my added beautiful, intelligent, and artistic commentary)](http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d4/diosabellissima/tsa.jpg). So wait: I can’t take my lipgloss, because that might kill orphan babies or puppies or something. But I **can** take my CORKSCREW? . . . Seriously? Well, I for one would like to personally thank the Transportation Safety Administration for this both logical and practical measure. After all, here I was worrying about how I would get through my 4 hour, non smoking flight without a fresh bottle of wine, a cigar, and a manicure. Oh wait, I can’t even bring wine with me. Son of a. . . ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887/2 "2006-08-31T06:37:04Z")
And for good measure: [Corkscrew](http://corkscrew.de/T_Korkenzieher/Bilder.jpg/t_001.JPG) vs [MAC Lilacrush lip gloss](http://auctionhere.com/files/evalueville_cosmetics/3152-cando_picture-1.jpg) That last one is terrifying! Can you imagine if that got on to a plane!? :eek: Thank goodness I have my corkscrew for protection. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887/3 "2006-08-31T06:44:10Z")
That corkscrew is very traditional and all, but really! Have you considered the one at the bottom of [this](http://www.pintaycolorea.splinder.com/archive/2005-05) page? Or [this](http://www.directoalpaladar.com/archivos/2005/12/07-sacacorchos-brucart-titan.php) model? Titanium powah, baby! It counts both as a sharp _and_ a blunt weapon, depending on how you grab it. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887/4 "2006-08-31T06:47:23Z")
And yet, neither of those make me feel comfortable about potentially being around. . . lipgloss :eek: ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 12:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887/5 "2006-08-31T12:02:51Z")
Apparently you can bring solid forms of lipstick/lip balm, etc., or at least that’s what the big screen in the entryway in O’Hare said on their allowed items list. Meanwhile, you could do as much damage with a really sharp pencil as you could with a corkscrew - a nice puncture but not terribly large or deep. ---
**Author:** ![Billdo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/billdo/32/315_2.png) [@Billdo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Billdo)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887/6 "2006-08-31T12:11:46Z")
Yes, but you can bring your [KY Jelly](http://www.tsa.gov/travelers/airtravel/prohibited/permitted-prohibited-items.shtm): [QUOTE=TSA] Up to 4 oz. of essential non-prescription liquid medications including saline solution, eye care products and KY jelly [/QUOTE] Have fun! ---
**Author:** ![Mindfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mindfield/32/19759_2.png) [@Mindfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mindfield)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887/7 "2006-08-31T13:03:28Z")
See? Those new airline restrictions aren’t _so_ bad. You can still: - Pop a bottle of wine (you’ll have to get that from the flight attendant 'cos only they’re allowed to handle dangerous water-based substances) - Get crunky and join the mile high club in the can - Cut a cigar to celebrate your new membership - Threaten to rip the cuticles off of anyone who complains about your stogey. It’s not so bad. ---
**Author:** ![mlerose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/43a26b/32.png) [@mlerose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mlerose)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887/8 "2006-08-31T15:52:34Z")
You can’t bring a waiter-style corkscrew if it has a little knife for cutting foil on it, because they don’t like knives of any size, even ones that are flimsy and shorter than 1 inch long. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887/9 "2006-08-31T16:09:32Z")
Wow, those airlines _are_ getting kinky. Seriously, wtf. Lack of common sense much? ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887/10 "2006-08-31T16:31:38Z")
[QUOTE=Ferret Herder] Apparently you can bring solid forms of lipstick/lip balm, etc., or at least that’s what the big screen in the entryway in O’Hare said on their allowed items list. Meanwhile, you could do as much damage with a really sharp pencil as you could with a corkscrew - a nice puncture but not terribly large or deep. [/QUOTE] Yeah, I was aware at the solid lip product rule. That’s fine . . .but it just isn’t the same! I mean, how DARE they expect me to go four hours without applying makeup? Actually, it’s more like 6 with boarding times! I’M WRITING MY CONGRESSMAN!!! :mad: 😛 I just find the contradiction funny. And, although I couldn’t do much more than a stab with a corkscrew, I imagine that the average wannabe-terrorist can do more with a corkscrew than a tube of shiny lip gloss. Osama bin Laden: "Well, gentlemen, we _were_ going to hijack the planes with the new corkscrew-lipgloss bomb I invented, but the US of A banned lip glosses. Let’s all just go kill ourselves now and get it over with. The US has won, gentlemen. The US has won. " ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Tiger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Mama\_Tiger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Tiger)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887/11 "2006-08-31T17:07:12Z")
I’m also allowed to bring my knitting needles and my pointed-tip metal scissors with blades less than 4" long. Have they _seen_ [sharp embroidery scissors](http://www.joann.com/catalog.jhtml?CATID=82060&PRODID=76714&source=search)? The ones I have with 1.5" long blades could easily put someone’s eye out – I’ve pricked myself painfully with the tips before! Sometimes I really do not understand the TSA. But I’m glad to know I can still [trim my cuticles, tweeze my brows, shave my pits, and curl my eyelashes](http://www.tsa.gov/travelers/airtravel/prohibited/permitted-prohibited-items.shtm), all while knitting a WMD. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887/12 "2006-08-31T17:17:07Z")
[QUOTE=DiosaBellissima] I can’t bring my lip gloss on the plane, but I can bring my corkscrew? Reply to Thread [/QUOTE] “I am hijacking this plane! You will fly this aircraft to Napa Valley! WINE TASTERS OF THE WORLD, UNITE!” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![934spe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/9/90db22/32.png) [@934spe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/934spe)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-cant-bring-my-lip-gloss-on-the-plane-but-i-can-bring-my-corkscrew/370887/13 "2006-08-31T18:36:56Z")
I am pissed I can’t bring my cattle prod. Yeah, it was actually listed as a no…