# I changed my name today.

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [July 14, 2005, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437 "2005-07-14T00:47:58Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 18\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![The\_Weird\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@The\_Weird\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Weird_One)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/21 "2005-07-15T00:12:59Z")

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My mother’s on her third marriage, and never has changed her name. It’s a good way of weeding out telemarketers:  
“Hello, can I please speak to Mrs. Husbandsname?”  
“Sorry, she doesn’t exist.”  
_click_

I have four names: First Middle Motherslast Fatherslast (exactly that many syllables, too). If I get married, I’ll probably add hubby’s name in there somewhere, if only to see people’s faces when I introduce myself by my full name. I hope it doesn’t screw up the cadence, though.

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**Author:** ![cherry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cherry)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/22 "2005-07-15T02:06:32Z")

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I was just talking about this with my sister-in-law yesterday. She had asked me if I legally changed my name to my husbands. My father-in-law had told her I was considering it, or that I had done it already, but I told her it wasn’t true. I haven’t nor has she. We both agreed that it is difficult to change when you’re from another country and it’s a lot of extra paperwork for her. She was born in China so it is harder to legally change your name. I have more than one passport and on-going immigration paperwork, so for me it’s just hard. Besides, we also felt like because our husbands were of a different culture than us, we wanted to retain part of our identity and heritage. I have no desire to change my name, I am attached to it. When his family asked if I would be changing my last name, my husband would always say no she has a name. But sometimes people can’t tell we are married. It doesn’t bother me; I can’t tell if it bothers the hubby. I will informally hyphenate my name on things when it is required, and my sister-in-law does the same, but legally no, not right now and not in the near future. Maybe if I have kids I might consider a legal name change, but I doubt it.

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**Author:** ![Ruby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/13edae/32.png) [@Ruby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruby)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/23 "2005-07-15T02:36:53Z")

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I was honored to take my husband’s last name. My maiden name is losing ground, too, but I didn’t consider not being Mrs. Ruby. Call me old fashioned, but I like it!

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**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/24 "2005-07-15T05:31:55Z")

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> [@gfloyd](#):
>
> … no one ever seems to use Ms other than school teachers …

In this country, at least, Ms is if anything more common than Miss for any female over school age. Almost the only women still called Miss _are_ school teachers.

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**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/25 "2005-07-15T06:56:30Z")

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My ex took my last name (and everything I owned) but kept her maiden name as a middle name. My darling Marcie kept her maiden name; a fact that confuses the hell out of her father. He insists on addressing all letters to her as Marcie Maidenname-Husbandname.

After all, what’s in a name? A rose, etc., etc.

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**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 11:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/26 "2005-07-15T11:29:31Z")

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> [@Elza B](#):
>
> He’s as much of a feminist as I am (if you can call a man a feminist)

/hijack

Yes you can. Lots of women are “machist”, too (Spanish word, yes I know it’s not proper English, but it is a lot more the complement/opposite of feminist than “male chauvinist”)

/end hijack

Have fun with the new name 🙂

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**Author:** ![surrotobeinMD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@surrotobeinMD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/surrotobeinMD)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 11:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/27 "2005-07-15T11:59:55Z")

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> [@chatelaine](#):
>
> Thanks, **Elza**. If you’re guilty of not being specific enough, then so I am.
> 
> My question was really _why_ it was so important to him that you change your name. You don’t have to go into it if it’s too personal, natch, but I’m just curious. Did he think all of you having the same name would make more of a “family”? Trying to ward off the inevitable questions? Etc?

Ahhhh… just like good ole’ debate of :

To swallow, or not to swallow, that is the question…

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**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/28 "2005-07-15T12:04:59Z")

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> [@The Weird One](#):
>
> My mother’s on her third marriage, and never has changed her name. It’s a good way of weeding out telemarketers:  
> “Hello, can I please speak to Mrs. Husbandsname?”  
> “Sorry, she doesn’t exist.”  
> _click_

I used to do that too, until the new dentist’s office called. Now I respond to “May I speak to Mrs. Husbandsname?” with “Who’s calling, please?” The answer tells me whether to say “This is Scarlett Maidenname, I’m Husband’s wife,” or blow them off.

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**Author:** ![Rock\_n\_Roach](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Rock\_n\_Roach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rock_n_Roach)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 12:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/29 "2005-07-15T12:26:44Z")

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I applaud some friends of mine. When they married he took her surname. I’ve never heard of anyone doing that before though I imagine it has.

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**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/30 "2005-07-15T12:44:32Z")

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> [@surrotobeinMD](#):
>
> Ahhhh… just like good ole’ debate of :
> 
> To swallow, or not to swallow, that is the question…

I don’t follow you. How is changing your name like swallowing or spitting?

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**Author:** ![Liz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/liz/32/17737_2.png) [@Liz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liz)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/31 "2005-07-15T12:51:07Z")

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> [@surrotobeinMD](#):
>
> Ahhhh… just like good ole’ debate of :
> 
> To swallow, or not to swallow, that is the question…

Who to the what now?

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**Author:** ![yellowval](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/919ad9/32.png) [@yellowval](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yellowval)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/32 "2005-07-15T13:06:55Z")

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> [@LouisB](#):
>
> My ex took my last name (and everything I owned) but kept her maiden name as a middle name.

That’s what I did too. Professionally, I go by Firstname Maidenname Lastname. To everyone else, we’re “the Lastnames.”

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**Author:** ![merrily](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@merrily](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/merrily)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/33 "2005-07-15T17:14:45Z")

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I took my husband’s last name, mostly because I thought it was fun. Yes, also a bit easier to spell…

But it was kind of cool to be a different person for a while, until I got used to it–like being a secret agent. I enjoyed the novelty.

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**Author:** ![kittenblue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ba8739/32.png) [@kittenblue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kittenblue)\
**Post date:** [July 15, 2005, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/34 "2005-07-15T18:10:24Z")

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All this angst…sometimes I think life was so much easier back in the “unenlightened” days. I took my husband’s name when we married in 1979. No qualms, no problems, very little paperwork. When we divorced, I didn’t change my name back, because it’s my name now, not his, and there were kids involved. If I marry again, I will change my name again and not think twice about it. I sometimes feel sorry for guys because they DON’T get to switch names. I’m still me, no matter what I’m called.

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**Author:** ![surrotobeinMD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@surrotobeinMD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/surrotobeinMD)\
**Post date:** [July 16, 2005, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/35 "2005-07-16T02:48:54Z")

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> [@GingerOfTheNorth](#):
>
> I don’t follow you. How is changing your name like swallowing or spitting?

Well, although I was trying to make a funny, I was eluding to the part about doing it for the man. Wether you want to or not, you do it because they want you to…

It really wasn’t anything more than a silly.

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**Author:** ![Elza\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Elza\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elza_B)\
**Post date:** [July 16, 2005, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/36 "2005-07-16T03:05:43Z")

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> [@chatelaine](#):
>
> Thanks for the explanation, **Elza**. I’ve got to say, it was really sweet of you to do that for him.
> 
> _sobs and flees into the night_

Thanks:). It wasn’t that sweet, although I appreciate your saying so - it was basically that it was a non-issue for me, you know? Of course, I’m more than willing to let him give me gifts to show his appreciation;).

However, growing up, I always wanted a NORMAL name, like Smith or Jones or Williams because my German last name was so hard to pronounce. I always said I’d never marry anyone with a weird last name.

Grrr…that flew right out the window. Now I have ANOTHER German name that’s even WORSE than my maiden name.

I really wanted to be a Miller.

E.

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**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\
**Post date:** [July 16, 2005, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/37 "2005-07-16T03:09:17Z")

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> [@Elza B](#):
>
> I always said I’d never marry anyone with a weird last name.

Funny, I always had a feeling that I’d marry someone with a weird name (no special reason). And I did! First and last; when asked for his name he usually just hands over his DL so they can copy it directly.

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**Author:** ![Elza\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Elza\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elza_B)\
**Post date:** [July 16, 2005, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-changed-my-name-today/312437/38 "2005-07-16T03:23:42Z")

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> [@Scarlett67](#):
>
> Funny, I always had a feeling that I’d marry someone with a weird name (no special reason). And I did! First and last; when asked for his name he usually just hands over his DL so they can copy it directly.

I should start doing that.

The funny thing is that we’re related to semi-famous baseball players on both sides - my great grandfather was on a minor league team in the 20s, and he’s got a distant cousin who was a famous ballplayer in the late 60s to mid-80s, so some people recognize my married name because of him (not many, but some). Obviously, no one knows my great-grandpa, but my husband’s dad looks just like his cousin.

E.

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