# I Could Use Some Advice: I Am At The End Of My Rope **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 28, 2017, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478 "2017-12-28T19:01:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2017, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/41 "2017-12-29T19:00:27Z")
**HeyHomie** you mentioned that the gun was a family heirloom, and in another post you mentioned that there was family around. Use the daycare as an excuse if you have to, but get the gun over to the other family members. Does your wife like looking after the kids? Perhaps a different stay at home job, that doesn’t require interacting with children, could be arranged. One has been mentioned on this thread, but I know there are others out there. If she is doing something else that is a better fit, her mental state may start to improve. Regarding some sort of job for you, can you give us a rough idea of your background? Assuming you agree that Step 1 is fixing the finances, the Dope mind may be able to help you with suggestions for you as well. I highly recommend you read **Spice Weasel** ’s post and the linked materials. She is a font of wisdom in these matters and more information is always helpful when you’re trying to make sense of things. Please come back with updates. I’d love to hear how you’re doing. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2017, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/42 "2017-12-30T00:18:06Z")
**HeyHomie** , have you ever tried temp work? A lot of businesses hire temps when they have a big wad of something repetitive, like filing or data entry, to do, something that’s going to be over when it’s finished and that doesn’t require a lot of interaction. And even if it’s not a great fit, it’s temporary. Also, **raventhief** is right that there are other work at home opportunities. Sadly, I don’t know how to find them, but I had an aunt that made decent money tying flies (for fishing). ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2017, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/43 "2017-12-30T16:13:50Z")
**UPDATE** Today I will be driving to a nearby town and applying at Pizza Hut, they _always_ have a “Now Hiring Drivers” sign up. I’ve delivered pizza before- easy money. I’ve also found a website that aggregates about 200 legitimate work-from-home opportunities. I’m going to be focusing on data entry and tutoring English to foreigners. In the mean time I’m going to try to figure out what to do with my gun. I agree that it doesn’t need to be in this house. BUT, selling it would be a yuge _faux pas_, as it’s an heirloom and, you know, family drama. I think I’ll ask Mrs. Homie to put it somewhere where I won’t find it while I’m out & about. I’ve also made an appointment with my therapist. I’m going to take him up on his offer to set me up with a psychiatrist. Clearly my issues are beyond my primary care doc’s ability to treat, and I obviously need more & better medicine. I want to thank all of you for your kind vibes and kind words. Just talking about this has made a yuge difference. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2017, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/44 "2017-12-30T16:25:03Z")
Good on you **HH**. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2017, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/45 "2017-12-30T16:29:29Z")
I inserted a comment in the OP to direct readers to the update in post #43, at **HeyHomie’s** request. Glad to hear things are starting to look up and you have a plan. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2017, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/46 "2017-12-30T17:12:22Z")
> [@HeyHomie](#): > > **UPDATE** > > Today I will be driving to a nearby town and applying at Pizza Hut, they _always_ have a “Now Hiring Drivers” sign up. I’ve delivered pizza before- easy money. > > I’ve also found a website that aggregates about 200 legitimate work-from-home opportunities. I’m going to be focusing on data entry and tutoring English to foreigners. > > In the mean time I’m going to try to figure out what to do with my gun. I agree that it doesn’t need to be in this house. BUT, selling it would be a yuge _faux pas_, as it’s an heirloom and, you know, family drama. I think I’ll ask Mrs. Homie to put it somewhere where I won’t find it while I’m out & about. > > I’ve also made an appointment with my therapist. I’m going to take him up on his offer to set me up with a psychiatrist. Clearly my issues are beyond my primary care doc’s ability to treat, and I obviously need more & better medicine. > > I want to thank all of you for your kind vibes and kind words. Just talking about this has made a yuge difference. Very nice to hear. Best of luck, and I hope you’ll use this thread going forward if you need some contact with a (mostly) friendly bunch! ---
**Author:** ![DSeid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dseid/32/20194_2.png) [@DSeid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSeid)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2017, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/47 "2017-12-30T20:55:22Z")
And Hey **HeyHomie** the yugeness of what you’ve just accomplished needs to be recognized. Really. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2017, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/48 "2017-12-30T20:59:16Z")
> [@HeyHomie](#): > > I want to thank all of you for your kind vibes and kind words. Just talking about this has made a yuge difference. I’m so impressed. The steps you’re taking are brave and important. Nice work! ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2017, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/49 "2017-12-30T21:12:10Z")
Just wanted to add my congrats as well. And also my admiration of how you responded to this thread. You took its advice to heart instead of getting all angry and defensive about it like many others would have. That takes a lot of character and maturity. Well done! ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2017, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/50 "2017-12-30T21:17:45Z")
> [@HeyHomie](#): > > I’ve also made an appointment with my therapist. I’m going to take him up on his offer to set me up with a psychiatrist. Clearly my issues are beyond my primary care doc’s ability to treat, and I obviously need more & better medicine. Which does not necessarily mean medication, but yeah, sometimes a fresh perspective is what… well, what the doctor ordered (sorry, the pun was compulsory). I found me a psychologist last year to help me clean up some crap from the corners of my mind and she was great, I hope your next head-healer is as good. ---
**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2017, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/51 "2017-12-30T23:07:12Z")
Good job, HH. All the luck and best wishes for you. Keep us posted! ---
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2017, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/52 "2017-12-30T23:10:40Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > Which does not necessarily mean medication, … Good for you. Keep at it. Don’t expect the answer to be in a pill (tho if a pill helps, good for you!) ---
**Author:** ![TubaDiva](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tubadiva/32/507_2.png) [@TubaDiva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TubaDiva)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2017, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/53 "2017-12-30T23:11:37Z")
> [@HeyHomie](#): > > **UPDATE** > > Today I will be driving to a nearby town and applying at Pizza Hut, they _always_ have a “Now Hiring Drivers” sign up. I’ve delivered pizza before- easy money. > > I’ve also found a website that aggregates about 200 legitimate work-from-home opportunities. I’m going to be focusing on data entry and tutoring English to foreigners. > > In the mean time I’m going to try to figure out what to do with my gun. I agree that it doesn’t need to be in this house. BUT, selling it would be a yuge _faux pas_, as it’s an heirloom and, you know, family drama. I think I’ll ask Mrs. Homie to put it somewhere where I won’t find it while I’m out & about. > > I’ve also made an appointment with my therapist. I’m going to take him up on his offer to set me up with a psychiatrist. Clearly my issues are beyond my primary care doc’s ability to treat, and I obviously need more & better medicine. > > I want to thank all of you for your kind vibes and kind words. Just talking about this has made a yuge difference. Sometimes just making one little move, taking one positive baby step can be the start of greater things. That tiny thing can break a logjam, get you on the road to positivity, and allow other good things to come on down. Don’t stop. It doesn’t have to be a gigantic leap. Just one little thing. Followed as soon as possible by another little thing. Lather, rinse, repeat. Wishing you and yours better outcomes on everything in 2018. your humble TubaDiva (who sometimes falls in the ditch her ownself) ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2017, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/54 "2017-12-30T23:29:48Z")
As someone who struggled with what I didn’t know was clinical depression for most of my life until a visit to hospital in '14, I can do no more than recommend **Spice Weasel** ’s post. (I had to read Viktor Frankl at university too. It may have been a little premature for me, but now I think I will reread it.) I am so encouraged to read your update, **HeyHomie**. Good luck. We are all pulling for you. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2018, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/55 "2018-01-03T01:17:26Z")
Great update, **Homie**. Let us know what the oddest thing on that aggregate list was. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2018, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/56 "2018-01-03T06:27:42Z")
Pullin’ for ya that you got the pizza delivery job - or any paid work, for that matter. A gig is a gig. Good luck. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2018, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/57 "2018-01-03T06:32:40Z")
Good for you. Keep taking those steps, one at a time. Please keep us posted. We care. {{{hugs}}} ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2018, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/58 "2018-01-03T18:52:59Z")
**A Bit Of Good News** We are approved for food stamps. I know that going on government assistance is nothing to be proud of, but the program was intended for people like me who are going through rough patches. Hopefully I won’t need them long. In the mean time, my diet will be more varied that rice & beans. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2018, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/59 "2018-01-03T19:29:26Z")
Glad to hear it, **Homie**. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2018, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478/60 "2018-01-03T19:44:37Z")
> [@HeyHomie](#): > > **A Bit Of Good News** > > We are approved for food stamps. I know that going on government assistance is nothing to be proud of, but the program was intended for people like me who are going through rough patches. Hopefully I won’t need them long. In the mean time, my diet will be more varied that rice & beans. Glad to see you were able to get that. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-could-use-some-advice-i-am-at-the-end-of-my-rope/805478.md?page=4)