I don’t know about the movie, but the rock band Bad Company certainly did (does? are they still around?) suck big time.
Insipid, jejune, predictable macho boy music of the crappiest order.
Okay, okay, I went to see it. It was cable-worthy. Actually kind of a promising (if hackneyed) premise, but mostly wasted.
Some slight spoilers:
Several really dumb things, like,
The laptop LCD screen that reads retinas, in a split second.
The “suitcase nuke” that apparently weighed less than a suitcase full of vacation clothes. Why, oh why couldn’t anyone on the set tell the actors to stop swinging that obviously empty thing around one-handed! Arrgh.
I also noticed that several “jokes” in the trailer turned out to be generated/changed in the editing room.
Like when Rock is playing speed chess with the goofy kid and goes through the whole “You’re gonna do this, and then I’ll do this, etc. etc so just give me $20 and save yourself 20 minutes.” In the trailer, we see a $20 bill hit the table, like the kid agreed. In the movie, he backs away from the table with some lame insult. No money. I don’t know why that bothers me, but it does.
There were a couple things like that.
And what the hell was going on with the white CIA guy, when he rode the motorcycle to that warehouse and got in a fight with somebody? I was totally lost. I thought we were being set up for a double-cross from that guy because I saw no reason for that scene.
Ah, I know, it doesn’t matter.
That scene in the trailer has pissed me off every time I’ve seen it. First, because the moves Rock is showing don’t seem to make sense, and second because if somebody did that to me, I’d let him know he’d forfeited the game by touching my pieces.
It’s odd; Joel Schumacher has shown he can direct a good movie (e.g., Falling Down, Tigerland), and Jerry Bruckheimer has produced a couple of good movies (Black Hawk Down, The Ref); why do they create so much crap? I mean movies that aren’t just mediocre, but aggressively bad. Armageddon was bursting with stupidity. It’s as if they held intense daily meetings to discuss how they could make the movie even stupider.
Bad Company isn’t so bad. I saw it a few nights ago. It’s not going to win any Oscars, but it’s not the worst movie that will be out this summer. It’s a good date movie.
The movie I am most concerned about is Windtalkers. I’m quite sure that John Woo is going to mess up this story with his completely bizarre, unrealistic and unentertaining action sequences. But I’ll see it anyway…
Armageddon was Michael Bay, not Joel Schumacher.
As for Bad Company, here’s my central problem with it – Why did the CIA need the arm/disarm codes? Their whole aim wasn’t to use the damn thing, it was simply to remove it from the market. Buy it, dismantle it, game over.
Because, apparently, by downloading the codes, it neutralizes the bomb. (Honest, I swear there was a line to that effect.) :rolleyes:
I also like the “we’re not really going anywhere with this” encryption of the disarm codes that made them have to download the entire file, the fact that there were no consequences to the file being on partially downloaded, the fact that the encryption was never mentioned again, and the fact that neither had any effect on the reading of the codes.
Didn’t say Schumacher directed it; but Armageddon was produced by Bruckheimer. I’ll be glad to give the blame to Michael Bay, though; God knows he’s a terrible director.