# I do NOT want to donate to breast cancer! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 7, 2011, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857 "2011-10-07T02:43:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/21 "2011-10-07T14:06:48Z")
What bugs me is that breast cancer has somehow found itself a hell of a marketing agency. Every October, we flog the ever-loving snot out of breast cancer and its research, but there’s never any mention of bone cancer, colo-rectal cancer, glioblastomas, Hodgkin’s lymphoma, pancreatic cancer and so on. At least with Steve Jobs’ passing, people may be at least obliquely aware that pancreatic cancer exists. ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/22 "2011-10-07T14:12:56Z")
> [@Novelty\_Bobble](#): > > I was dining at a posh London restaurant and when the time came to settle-up I noticed that they had put a £4 donation to the Asian Tsunami relief fund on my bill. They hadn’t mentioned this, it was tucked away down in the extras with a tiny note to say “please ask for this to be removed if you do not wish to donate” > I asked to see the manager and had it taken off plus the service charge. No tip, no nothing. It was a cheap and manipulative stunt on their part and I hope they had many more complaining like I did. Complaining: Yes. Having the donation removed: Yes. Completely stiffing your server(s) because of something the restaurant’s management did: Not Cool. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/23 "2011-10-07T14:15:54Z")
> [@Novelty\_Bobble](#): > > I asked to see the manager and had it taken off plus the service charge. No tip, no nothing. It was a cheap and manipulative stunt on their part and I hope they had many more complaining like I did. Well I guess I’ll be the one to hijack this sucker into a 6 page tipping thread that spirals into the Pit. You do know that the waiter has absolutely no say and no control over the policies of management. You waiter didn’t put that charge there, so I’m not sure why you decided to withhold a tip because of it. ETA: and as long as it’s going to the Pit, I’m calling out **Wheelz** for the ninja. ---
**Author:** ![Scougs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scougs/32/3158_2.png) [@Scougs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scougs)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/24 "2011-10-07T14:28:54Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > Complaining: Yes. > Having the donation removed: Yes. > Completely stiffing your server(s) because of something the restaurant’s management did: Not Cool. This was in a London restaurant, where waiters get paid a living wage and tips left on credit cards frequently don’t go anywhere near the waiter’s pocket. You can’t really “stiff” a server in the UK - different system. ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/25 "2011-10-07T14:31:36Z")
> [@Scougs](#): > > This was in a London restaurant, where waiters get paid a living wage and tips left on credit cards frequently don’t go anywhere near the waiter’s pocket. You can’t really “stiff” a server in the UK - different system. Ignorance fought, then. But where _do_ tips in London go? ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/26 "2011-10-07T14:43:06Z")
> [@SpoilerVirgin](#): > > I hear this every October, and it’s just not true. > > The color for prostate cancer ribbons is [light blue](http://www.prostatecancerstore.org/Prostate-Cancer-Blue-Ribbon-Pin-RIBBON-PIN.htm?utm_source=Google&utm_medium=SEM&utm_campaign=PCF%2BGeneral&gclid=CK7Kqr3T1qsCFQhrgwodTSSpUA). Maybe we need to promote prostate cancer awareness awareness. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/27 "2011-10-07T15:09:50Z")
> [@Mangetout](#): > > Save the whales? Where will I keep them? [Here.](http://s72.photobucket.com/albums/i178/fairychatmom/CSM%20Ceramics%20Class/?action=view¤t=Savethewhales.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![dangermom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e274bd/32.png) [@dangermom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dangermom)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/28 "2011-10-07T15:11:05Z")
> [@gotpasswords](#): > > What bugs me is that breast cancer has somehow found itself a hell of a marketing agency. Yesterday I took my daughter in to the college bookstore to buy a lab coat for her Mad Scientist Halloween costume. They had a ton of sparkly pink breast cancer stuff. The one that really kind of got to me was a packet of…cards, I think, with a cartoon of a pretty young carefree girl with a scarf around her neck, that said “Bald is beautiful!” Now, cancer aside, actually I do think that bald is beautiful on many women. BUT my good friend is currently going through her 3rd cancer treatment (15 days of radiation in 3 weeks this time), and she is bald, and not terribly pleased about it. She is not young or pretty or carefree; she’s tired and puffy from steroids and the same amazing woman I’ve admired for years, and I want to be like her when I grow up but pink sparkly cards of pretty girls do not make her feel better about her hair, nor do they make me want to buy them. Ew. The near-glamorization of breast cancer kinda freaks me out. ---
**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/29 "2011-10-07T15:16:49Z")
> [@Laggard](#): > > Yeah, almost as many men die of prostate cancer yearly but there are no prostate awareness ribons, walks or runs. Prostate cancer doesn’t even get its own color! > > What’s up with that? And colon cancer! I had an idea a few years ago to start a brown ribbon campaign for colon cancer, but I didn’t think the idea would catch on. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/30 "2011-10-07T15:19:20Z")
> [@gotpasswords](#): > > What bugs me is that breast cancer has somehow found itself a hell of a marketing agency. > > Every October, we flog the ever-loving snot out of breast cancer and its research, but there’s never any mention of bone cancer, colo-rectal cancer, glioblastomas, Hodgkin’s lymphoma, pancreatic cancer and so on. There are parts of this that can be annoying and parts that really shouldn’t be. What’s _not_ annoying is that breast cancer patients and their families and loved ones decided that that illness wasn’t getting much attention, the end result of which is that research is much better funded than it used to be, and patients live longer and without the stigma they used to. Would that that happens to all the illnesses that afflict people we care about. What _is_ annoying is the pink everywhere, the fact that these people still talk about raising awareness when all the money they spend on awareness could probably go straight to research at this point because everyone’s aware of breast cancer, some of the cutesy trappings of the culture and the way companies have glommed onto it (even though this probably benefits patients). It’s not cool to talk about cancer like it’s a club and not a lethal illness. It’s not true that nobody pays attention to any other cancer, but it IS true that many cancers are more difficult to treat than breast cancer and have few or no options. You can’t punish the breast cancer groups for their success but you can let that guide your priorities, obviously. ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/31 "2011-10-07T15:21:41Z")
> [@Mangetout](#): > > Save the whales? Where will I keep them? I don’t know where you’d keep them, but if you save enough, you can redeem them for valuable prizes! ---
**Author:** ![MegaBee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f0a364/32.png) [@MegaBee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MegaBee)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/32 "2011-10-07T15:22:42Z")
> [@gotpasswords](#): > > What bugs me is that breast cancer has somehow found itself a hell of a marketing agency. Yes. It’s marketing agency is called “involving breasts.” ---
**Author:** ![Novelty\_Bobble](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Novelty\_Bobble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Novelty_Bobble)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/33 "2011-10-07T15:28:27Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > Complaining: Yes. > Having the donation removed: Yes. > Completely stiffing your server(s) because of something the restaurant’s management did: Not Cool. I don’t care who’s fault it was and I have no interest in finding out. I was put in a position of either coughing up and saying nothing, which just encourages this behaviour, or making a stand. If I just have the donation removed it puts very little pressure on the management, and seeing as I can’t refuse to pay for the food already eaten I have to exert pressure though the removal of service charge and tip. If enough people do that then management will eventually get the message. Totally fair, as those directly relate to the poor service I’d experienced. ---
**Author:** ![Sudden\_Kestrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecd19e/32.png) [@Sudden\_Kestrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sudden_Kestrel)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/34 "2011-10-07T15:28:50Z")
> [@dangermom](#): > > The near-glamorization of breast cancer kinda freaks me out. That’s \*exactly \* what bothers me about it, but I was not able to define it so well. Thanks. I haven’t had any cashiers ask me about donating yet, but in the OP’s situation I’d have to say, “No thank you, but do you have anything in lung cancer? How about the GI tract?” ---
**Author:** ![SpoilerVirgin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4491bb/32.png) [@SpoilerVirgin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpoilerVirgin)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/35 "2011-10-07T15:36:15Z")
> [@Shoeless](#): > > And colon cancer! I had an idea a few years ago to start a brown ribbon campaign for colon cancer, but I didn’t think the idea would catch on. [Dark blue](http://www.google.com/search?q=colon+cancer+awareness+ribbon&tbm=isch&hl=en&source=hp&gbv=2&gs_sm=c&gs_upl=1062l3531l0l6140l15l13l0l2l2l1l282l1720l0.2.6l8l0&oq=colon+cancer+awareness+ribbon&aq=f&aqi=&aql=) is the color for colon cancer awareness ribbons. I have to say that I do find some aspects of the breast cancer awareness campaign annoying, in particular the need for people to be _so open_ about all aspects of their disease. I’m a very private person. When I needed to have surgery (not breast cancer surgery), I told only one person outside of my immediate family. Even my boss only knew that I would be “having a procedure,” without any specifics. If sharing everything helps people to cope with their illness, that’s their choice, but it does make me uncomfortable, as does that Lifetime movie about cancer that is being heavily advertised and promoted. I suppose if the ultimate result is people living longer, happier lives and fewer people having cancer, it’s a good thing. ---
**Author:** ![The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_wind_of_my_soul)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/36 "2011-10-07T15:41:37Z")
What gets my ire the most is donating to “Breast Cancer Awareness.” My mother died of breast cancer. Any time someone asks me if I want to donate a dollar to breast cancer awareness, I feel like snapping at them “I am PLENTY aware of breast cancer.” ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/37 "2011-10-07T15:44:34Z")
> [@MegaBee](#): > > Yes. It’s marketing agency is called “involving breasts.” If that were true, breast cancer would have been better treated earlier. > [@SpoilerVirgin](#): > > I have to say that I do find some aspects of the breast cancer awareness campaign annoying, in particular the need for people to be _so open_ about all aspects of their disease. I can understand that. I do think it beats the alternative. ---
**Author:** ![JoThrive](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@JoThrive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JoThrive)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/38 "2011-10-07T17:11:58Z")
There was a time when having breast cancer was considered to be an almost shameful thing. Betty Ford did a lot to raise awareness of breast cancer, and is to be thanked for that. I am a breast cancer survivor, and the oncologists always asked if there was a history of breast cancer in my family. I didn’t really know, no one ever talked about such things when I was a youngster. If any female relative of mine had BC they certainly kept it a secret. I’m glad we are more open about BC now, and the recovery rate has significantly improved in recent years. So I will wear my little pink ribbon throughout October, and I am very thankful that I am still here to wear the thing. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Snickers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Snickers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snickers)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/39 "2011-10-07T17:35:30Z")
> [@Laggard](#): > > Yeah, almost as many men die of prostate cancer yearly but there are no prostate awareness ribons, walks or runs. Prostate cancer doesn’t even get its own color! > > What’s up with that? The Hartford sponsors a 5K - this year titled the “Dash 4 Dads” - specifically targeted at raising awareness of prostate cancer (and, not coincidentally :rolleyes:, spotlighting how it offers insurance policies for prostate cancer patients/survivors at regular, normal healthy-person rates). I ran the D4D this year and have run it previously. It’s true that prostate cancer doesn’t have the level of awareness that it probably should. And the turnout this year wasn’t huge; maybe 250 people. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2011, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857/40 "2011-10-07T17:45:19Z")
> [@Laggard](#): > > Yeah, almost as many men die of prostate cancer yearly but there are no prostate awareness ribons, walks or runs. Prostate cancer doesn’t even get its own color! Yeah, I’m not sure how I missed this. There are plenty of ribbons, walks, runs, and other types of fundraisers for other cancers. I wouldn’t be surprised if prostate cancer has the best awareness and fundraising after breast cancer - maybe lung cancer is ahead because of its connection to smoking. One difference between prostate cancer and breast cancer is basically that men don’t like to talk about it, which I can understand. There’s also the fact that breast cancer is a lot more common in younger women compared to prostate cancer in younger men. And as far as colors go - it’s not like there is an official color council. There’s a colored ribbon for everything. It’s just a question of how successful the different groups are in getting people to associate a color with their cause. At this point more people know pink ribbon = breast cancer than yellow ribbon = veterans. Even the autism groups have managed to get the puzzle-piece-color ribbon out there. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-do-not-want-to-donate-to-breast-cancer/598857.md?page=3)