# I don't get New Jersey jokes **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 12, 2009, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211 "2009-05-12T20:31:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![psycat90](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@psycat90](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psycat90)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/41 "2009-05-13T17:16:48Z")
> [@kasuo](#): > > So _is it true_ what they say about NJ girls? > > Actually, what _do_ they say about NJ girls..? They say [this](http://www.bustedtees.com/jerseygirls). My sister (in NJ) bought that t-shirt for my husband one Christmas. He loved it until it shrunk and no longer fit him. He gave it to my oldest son, who also gets a kick out of wearing it and wore it on Mother’s Day just for me - “Look Mom, I’m wearing your favorite shirt!” :\ [Tom Waits says otherwise.](http://www.lyricsfreak.com/t/tom+waits/jersey+girl_20138860.html) Although I like Bruce’s version much better. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/42 "2009-05-13T17:18:39Z")
> [@kasuo](#): > > So _is it true_ what they say about NJ girls? > > Actually, what _do_ they say about NJ girls..? I would say Jersey girls are cheap, but I would be repeating myself. ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/43 "2009-05-13T17:24:52Z")
> [@The\_Scrivener](#): > > This. We really don’t need the pop. density to climb much higher, and that goes double for NYC folks (the most homicidal drivers are disproportionately from The Empire State), so the official line is that everything about 'Jersey sucks. Oh please! :rolleyes: I came in here wanting to chime in that New Jersey is actually pretty nice, that I like it there, I enjoyed living there, but then you had to go and say this. New Jersey drivers are some of the worst in the nation, New York drivers are some of the best in the nation. The problem here is that New Yorkers expect people to know how to drive their cars, not just as cattle following the signage but to actually be paying attention to the flow of traffic. New Yorkers can drive within inches of each other and there is rarely a wreck. People from New Jersey on the other hand, well the Jersey turn says it all. That’s when you put your nose out into oncoming traffic, stop, THEN look both ways. It’s truly horrific and it’s an epidemic in New Jersey. If there is one thing you can truly make fun of New Jersey for it’s their drivers. The vast bulk of New Jersey is actually rolling green fields. ---
**Author:** ![batsto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b2d939/32.png) [@batsto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/batsto)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/44 "2009-05-13T17:31:44Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > But…y’all talk funny. I don’t think we do. I’m not sure where that ‘Jersey accent’ comes from that I hear comics using. I’ve lived here 36 years and I have never once heard someone say something like “New Joisey”. Nor has anyone in any other state pointed out my ‘New Jersey’ accent. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/45 "2009-05-13T17:39:33Z")
> [@](#): > > I don’t think we do. I’m not sure where that ‘Jersey accent’ comes from that I hear comics using. I’ve lived here 36 years and I have never once heard someone say something like “New Joisey”. Nor has anyone in any other state pointed out my ‘New Jersey’ accent. Agreed. The “Joisey accent” (used for a time on SNL – “Are you from Joisey? I’m from Joisey” isn’t from New Jersey at all. I’ve never heasrd anyone from New Jersey with it. If anything, it’s an exaggerated Brooklyn accent. Although I don’t know if anyone from Brooklyn still speaks like that, either. Sometimes people seem to think an exaggerated Long Island accent is typica;l New Jersey (“cuppa KAW-fee”), but I can’t say that sounds realistic to me, either. ---
**Author:** ![Digital\_Stimulus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Digital\_Stimulus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Digital_Stimulus)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/46 "2009-05-13T18:29:29Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > What I find surprising is the way people single out those refineries in New Jersey as if they’re somehow unique. It’s not the _uniqueness_ of the areas, it’s the _proportion_. > [@batsto](#): > > Nor has anyone in any other state pointed out my ‘New Jersey’ accent. I grew up in (northern) NJ. My most prominent ‘accent incident’ happened in New Orleans (Mardi Gras). Yeah, I was pretty drunk, which I’d guess made my accent more pronounced, and some gals snickered at it. At the time, I didn’t even realize I _had_ an accent – y’know, that’s when _other_ people talk funny. With it brought to my attention, I started to notice just how pronounced the verbal tics were. Then I started work on correcting them. Since then, I’ve had people all over the country tell me they’d never have guessed I grew up in NJ. Although I do have to say that if I get excited and start talking fast, the accent is most definitely still there. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/47 "2009-05-13T18:40:23Z")
Some friends and I were in Kentucky once, chatting with some locals. “Y’all sure do talk funny”, one of them mentioned. “Huh? Us? Well, I guess it’s a matter of what you’re used to, since it sure sounds to me like you’re the ones with an exaggerated accent. Can you describe how we sound to you?” “Y’all talk like the people on the TV”. Ah-hah…that hit it right on the head for me. They considered our complete and utter lack of any kind of regional accent – the default, really – an accent. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/48 "2009-05-13T18:41:32Z")
> [@BrotherCadfael](#): > > Q: Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste dumps and California all the lawyers? > > A: New Jersey got first choice. I heard that one with New York instead of California. \*\*Jackknifed Juggernaut \*\*, I noticed your profile location. Good one. And we Jerseyians don’t have an accent, _you_ have an accent. As far as I can tell, we sound pretty much like New Yorkers. ---
**Author:** ![UltraVires](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ecccb3/32.png) [@UltraVires](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UltraVires)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/49 "2009-05-13T19:20:19Z")
> [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](#): > > Why would you want to? We have the convenience of staying in our cars on hot or cold days and not having to get our hands smelly, with the cheapest gas in the country. I could never understand this complaint. Do you also prefer to dump your own garbage at the landfill? I won’t deny that it would be an excellent service, one that could/should be provided by a business. But for the state to take such an authoritarian role as to tell people that if they were to pump their own gas that they would end up burning down whole towns, that speaks to an arrogant level of government that can’t be trusted in other matters. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/50 "2009-05-13T19:36:13Z")
> [@UncleRojelio](#): > > Really? What exit? What? 😃 > [@tomndebb](#): > > Mob run docks > Chemicals in Bayonne, Elizabeth, Linden, etc. > Newark Crime > Hudson County Corruption > One of the ugliest stretches of Interstate Highway in the country > > Atlantic City is dowdy (with a reputation of mob involvement) > The Pines Barrens, (in addition to having an unfortunate name), are known for freaky events or the Kallikuks > > = = = > > Now, I am aware that there is a lot more to New Jersey than those stereotyped situtations and even that those stereotypes are not all that accurate, but, for better or worse, the state has done rather little to promote the Delaware Water Gap, its thriving dairy industry, its coastline, the real beauty of ther Barrens, or its rich history, (most folks probably think Trenton and Monmouth are in Pennsylvania), so the trouble spots collect the most attention. Well Trenton is not that great any more. But just outside of Trenton is wonderful and Monmouth County is great. Camden is about the worst place in the US and yet still has the redeeming value of the Aquarium and the Battleship New Jersey. I go about once a year on average. > [@dangermom](#): > > About 10 years ago we drove through New Jersey on the way to upstate New York. I’m from CA and had only ever heard vague jokes about the awfulness of NJ, so was stunned to find that most of it was utterly beautiful–it was October, everything was green, there were trees turning colors everywhere. Maybe some of the cities aren’t all that great, but gosh, it was just really pretty. A common experience of anyone that doesn’t have to drive just the turnpike or just in the North East of the state. > [@astro](#): > > It’s Joe Piscipo’s fault. But the jokes started before him. Even my user name predates Joe. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/51 "2009-05-13T20:13:51Z")
> [@jtgain](#): > > But for the state to take such an authoritarian role as to tell people that if they were to pump their own gas that they would end up burning down whole towns, that speaks to an arrogant level of government that can’t be trusted in other matters. They can always be trusted to accept a kickback. ---
**Author:** ![kenner116](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecb155/32.png) [@kenner116](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenner116)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/52 "2009-05-13T20:40:28Z")
Who the heck pumps their own gas? It’s so uncivilized! If I ever move out of this state, it would have to be to Oregon (the only other non-self-serve state). If Jersey ever legalizes self-serve gas stations, society will collapse and our land will break off the mainland and into the Atlantic (I’m hoping we end up somewhere near Barcelona). What would they legalize next, rape and murder? I once got gas in NYC and it was a disaster. I would have rather been punched in the face than go through that experience again. -kenner116, Exit 40 off the Parkway ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/53 "2009-05-13T20:45:00Z")
> [@kenner116](#): > > Who the heck pumps their own gas? It’s so uncivilized! If I ever move out of this state, it would have to be to Oregon (the only other non-self-serve state). If Jersey ever legalizes self-serve gas stations, society will collapse and our land will break off the mainland and into the Atlantic (I’m hoping we end up somewhere near Barcelona). What would they legalize next, rape and murder? I once got gas in NYC and it was a disaster. I would have rather been punched in the face than go through that experience again. > > -kenner116, Exit 40 off the Parkway Its OK, you won’t have to do it again. I’ve never minded pumping gas, but on cold wet or snowy days, it is nice to sit comfy in my car. ---
**Author:** ![Carl\_Corey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Carl\_Corey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carl_Corey)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/54 "2009-05-13T20:59:48Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > Yes, sir. I love travelling to DC and getting my gas pumped (that sounds dirty but isn’t) at the Knute Rockne service area. Or the Clara Barton one, I go either way. _Sure_ it’s not dirty. And I didn’t know you went either way, **gigi**. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2009, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/55 "2009-05-13T21:48:34Z")
> [@Carl\_Corey](#): > > _Sure_ it’s not dirty. > > And I didn’t know you went either way, **gigi**. 87 and heaven or wine me, dine me, 89 me. Whatever octane floats your tank. ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/56 "2009-05-14T02:10:03Z")
You can get into the state for free but you have to pay to leave. Who can’t find a joke in that kind of situation? ---
**Author:** ![mack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mack)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/57 "2009-05-14T03:54:34Z")
> [@cmkeller](#): > > You can get into the state for free but you have to pay to leave. Who can’t find a joke in that kind of situation? [psst!](http://www.redbubble.com/people/bridges/art/466618-6-free-bridge-to-phillipsburg)don’t tell anybody! ---
**Author:** ![BlankSlate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blankslate/32/80_2.png) [@BlankSlate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlankSlate)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/58 "2009-05-14T07:44:08Z")
Because when you can’t pump your own gas, you have to _wait._ And to complete the transaction, some guy has to go back and forth with your cash/card while you wait some more. If the place is busy, one guy will be running from car to car, meanwhile you’re sitting there long after your tank is full. Full serve should be an option, not a requirement. Great prices, though. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/59 "2009-05-14T19:49:41Z")
> [@What\_Exit](#): > > Even my user name predates Joe. And my location field predates your user name. So there! I actually find that hellish industrial landscape of refineries and container shipping cranes strangely beautiful. I’m not sure how to put it into words. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2009, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211/60 "2009-05-14T20:10:06Z")
> [@Green\_Bean](#): > > And my location field predates your user name. So there! > > I actually find that hellish industrial landscape of refineries and container shipping cranes strangely beautiful. I’m not sure how to put it into words. I meant the “What Exit?” Joke predates Joe Piscopo [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-get-new-jersey-jokes/496211.md?page=4)