# I don't think Tom Cruise is gay **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 31, 2005, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880 "2005-12-31T19:48:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/21 "2006-01-01T17:33:14Z")
I think, based on nothing in particular, that Tom is two beers gay. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/22 "2006-01-01T17:34:36Z")
> [@Amp](#): > > So how do we know that Katie isn’t being banged by someone else other than Tom? Only the syringe knows for sure. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/23 "2006-01-01T17:48:12Z")
Maybe Katie Holmes is really a guy. Think about THAT! ---
**Author:** ![Wallenstein](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5a626/32.png) [@Wallenstein](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wallenstein)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/24 "2006-01-01T17:57:59Z")
> [@DMark](#): > > Then Joe had a guy over to his place and somehow, a few photos were stolen from Joe’s bedroom. These photos were also put on the market but before they were published, the big lawsuit hit. > So - if you believe my friend, and I do, Tom has at least had one long term Gay affair. I dunno… those pics would be worth a absolute fortune; given the amount of other stuff that appears on t’internet I’m amazed that one copy hasn’t sneaked out in the last 10 yrs. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/25 "2006-01-01T18:36:49Z")
At this point, wouldn’t it be kind of a relief to find out that Cruise’s problem is merely that he’s gay? ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/26 "2006-01-01T18:46:28Z")
> [@EJsGirl](#): > > I have wandered around the fringes of Hollywood all my life, and the gay rumors started right around the time he started getting work. Casting couches and all that. > > It may just have been that he was willing to do anything to be famous. :eek: But . . . but that would imply that Hollywood has some gay **directors**. . . Oh, my, I’m going to have to go lie down! ---
**Author:** ![Ensign\_Edison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ab992/32.png) [@Ensign\_Edison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ensign_Edison)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/27 "2006-01-01T19:15:54Z")
> [@Stentor 2.5](#): > > “Gay? I wish! If I were gay they’d be no problem! No, what I have is a romantic abnormality, one so unbelievable that it must be hidden from the public at all cost.” > ----Troy Mclure That’s pretty much what goes through my mind every time I see him lately. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/28 "2006-01-01T19:22:41Z")
> [@Stentor 2.5](#): > > “Gay? I wish! If I were gay they’d be no problem! No, what I have is a romantic abnormality, one so unbelievable that it must be hidden from the public at all cost.” > ----Troy Mclure IIRC, Troy McClure had a thing for fish. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/29 "2006-01-01T23:42:43Z")
There were also rumours swirling about (from quite reliable sources, in my case) about Tom’s marriage contract to Nicole Kidman- how long, how many kids, etc. Then when he was going to switch her in for a new model (after the whole Penelope Creuz thing- who may be making a career out of being a fag hag), he apparently spun a dial in a circle of glossy magazines and first chose [Scarlett Johansson](http://www.radaronline.com/fresh-intelligence/2005/06/17/index.php). > [@](#): > > “[Cruise] took me into this room, which was stifling hot, and was showing me all kinds of info about joining the church,” Johansson told our source. “The whole time he didn’t even offer me a cookie!” Instead, he offered her dinner—and a glimpse into the Twilight Zone. > > After two hours of proselytizing, our source says Cruise opened a door to reveal a second room full of upper-level Scientologists who had been waiting to dine with the pair, at which point the cool-headed ingenue politely excused herself. Soon after the meeting, Johansson dropped out of Mission Impossible III, reportedly due to scheduling conflicts. Doesn’t necessarily mean it’s going to be a Lavendar Marriage, but it’s at the very least some sort of Scientology antichrist-type arrangement. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/30 "2006-01-01T23:45:27Z")
Oh, and that dazed grin doesn’t mean Katie Holmes is getting laid. It means she’s gone from being an ex **Dawson’s Creek** star with questionable acting skills to one of the most famous actresses in America. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/31 "2006-01-01T23:46:27Z")
Wow, **Cat Fight**. You made me like Scarlett Johansson better than I already do. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/32 "2006-01-02T00:10:43Z")
> [@Cat Fight](#): > > Oh, and that dazed grin doesn’t mean Katie Holmes is getting laid. It means she’s gone from being an ex **Dawson’s Creek** star with questionable acting skills to one of the most famous actresses in America. That’s what SHE thinks. It’s more like the girl you want to arrange a kidnapping and deprogramming for. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/33 "2006-01-02T01:06:40Z")
> [@EJsGirl](#): > > I have wandered around the fringes of Hollywood all my life, and the gay rumors started right around the time he started getting work. Casting couches and all that. > > It may just have been that he was willing to do anything to be famous. Well, considering his feature debut was under the direction of Franco “Gay As a Cat in a Dress”\* Zeffirelli . . . \*(Gay as Christmas in Key West? gay as a Catholic priest? What’s the gayest you can be? Gay as Oscar Wilde’s Aunt Fanny? gay as a pair of white shorts? gay as a tree full of parrots? . . .) ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/34 "2006-01-02T02:12:23Z")
Did he get into Scientology before or after his marriage to Nicole? Now, I thought they were a couple who could make it, a la Mr and Mrs Paul Newman, but after 10 years they split, reportedly because he wanted to raise the kidlets to be little Scientologists and she didn’t. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/35 "2006-01-02T02:16:46Z")
> [@ivylass](#): > > Did he get into Scientology before or after his marriage to Nicole? He joined the Church in 1990, while he was married to Mimi Rogers. [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom\_cruise#Church\_of\_Scientology](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom_cruise#Church_of_Scientology) ---
**Author:** ![asterion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4da419/32.png) [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/36 "2006-01-02T03:54:31Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#): > > Maybe Katie Holmes is really a guy. > > Think about THAT! That’d be shocking, especially since she was damn attractive in _Batman Begins_. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/37 "2006-01-02T04:08:21Z")
> [@asterion](#): > > That’d be shocking, especially since she was damn attractive in _Batman Begins_. Maybe she’s a man and _you’re_ gay. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/38 "2006-01-02T05:48:54Z")
Am I the only one that absolutely doesn’t care if he’s gay or not? ---
**Author:** ![Walloon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/fbc32d/32.png) [@Walloon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walloon)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/39 "2006-01-02T06:56:15Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > He flipped out completely, filed a huge lawsuit, and continued to do so to anyone who even HINTED he might be less than 110% heterosexual. Tom Cruise sued the supermarket tabloid [_The Star_](http://www.eonline.com/News/Court/9904.cruise.html) over a story headlined “We Had to Teach Tom and Nicole How to Make Love,” alleging that sex coaches were needed for them when filming _Eyes Wide Shut_. _The Star_ later made a full retraction of the article’s claims. In 2001, Cruise sued a [gay porn star](http://www.eonline.com/News/Items/0,1,8207,00.html) who claimed in an interview with the French fan magazine _Actustar_ that he and Tom were secret lovers (during Cruise’s marriage to Nicole Kidman, thus also alleging adultery). He later admitted that he and Cruise had never met, and that interview was fabricated. That same year, Cruise sued _Bold_ magazine publisher Michael Davis, who claimed he had Cruise engaged in homosexual activity. Davis later conceded that Cruise does not in fact appear in the videotape. Cruise and Kidman sued and won against the London tabloid [_The Express_](http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/203779.stm) in 1998 after it alleged that their marriage was a sham. In 1996, Cruise sued the German magazine [_Bunte_](http://yahoo.eonline.com/News/Items/0,1,48,00.html) after it claimed he had “zero sperm count”. The magazine retracted the allegation. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2006, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880/40 "2006-01-02T07:55:20Z")
> [@Evil Captor](#): > > Am I the only one that absolutely doesn’t care if he’s gay or not? Nope. The only thing I care less about is what other people’s opinions are about his sexuality are. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-think-tom-cruise-is-gay/337880.md?page=3)