# I don't understand why my girlfriend said this to me. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 4, 2018, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271 "2018-07-04T06:05:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![T-Minus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c77e96/32.png) [@T-Minus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/T-Minus)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/1 "2018-07-04T06:05:40Z")
Hey there guys, so I was talking to my girlfriend tonight and I was acting goofy (just laughing and she said this to me: “you know when you act goofy, you kinda make me regret going into a relationship with you…” I said woah, why do you got to be like that? Then she said “I am letting you know how you make me feel sometimes.” I feel kind of insulted by that. What are your guys opinion on it? ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/2 "2018-07-04T06:08:39Z")
At least she was straight up and honest with you instead of biting her tongue and choking on her rage for months/years, all the while learning to resent and hate you and herself for letting it go for so long. ---
**Author:** ![T-Minus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c77e96/32.png) [@T-Minus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/T-Minus)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/3 "2018-07-04T06:13:12Z")
True, I guess I rather her say it sooner rather then later. ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/4 "2018-07-04T06:17:47Z")
It’s better than catching her mumble it under her breath and being all passive aggressive about it. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 6:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/5 "2018-07-04T06:19:04Z")
Do you act goofy alot? ---
**Author:** ![T-Minus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c77e96/32.png) [@T-Minus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/T-Minus)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/6 "2018-07-04T06:23:21Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Do you act goofy alot? Once in a while, not a whole lot. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 6:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/7 "2018-07-04T06:25:22Z")
Hmmmm? Maybe she just had a bad day. ---
**Author:** ![DavidwithanR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@DavidwithanR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidwithanR)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 7:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/8 "2018-07-04T07:24:34Z")
There are different reasons she might say that. Assume the best reason, unless there’s evidence against it. My guess at a good reason: She knows you, and knows that if she gives you a hint you aren’t going to understand the hint, or maybe not even realize there WAS a hint. So she tells you the truth straight up. If you can find a way to take this as “useful information without emotions”, does it help? ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 7:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/9 "2018-07-04T07:29:56Z")
Can you be more specific on your goofiness? Why were you laughing? ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 7:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/10 "2018-07-04T07:38:07Z")
You were giving her the shits. Maybe try being goofy\* again in a few weeks, and if it results in her telling you off again, desist with the goofy shit. Or get a new girlfriend who likes you being goofy. \*Whatever the fuck ‘goofy’ is. ---
**Author:** ![T-Minus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c77e96/32.png) [@T-Minus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/T-Minus)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/11 "2018-07-04T07:43:35Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > Can you be more specific on your goofiness? Why were you laughing? It was just some random funny articles and pictures on the internet. ---
**Author:** ![Delicious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dbc845/32.png) [@Delicious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Delicious)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 7:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/12 "2018-07-04T07:48:00Z")
Do you maybe have a really weird laugh? You might not realise you’re going ‘Hurrr Huuuuur _snort_ HUuuuuuurrrr’ ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/13 "2018-07-04T07:51:00Z")
Oh, I see. She didn’t want your divided attention. Put the device away around her, sometimes. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 7:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/14 "2018-07-04T07:59:36Z")
Either your gf is a complete basketcase and the sound of laughter makes her regret being with you or you are leaving something out. Can you define “acting goofy” a little more specifically? ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 9:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/15 "2018-07-04T09:15:18Z")
She’s in phase 1 of rearranging your personality to suit herself. As a matter of fact she’s probably past phase 1 already, has she made you change what you wear or what you eat yet? Eventually she’ll change you into the person she’d be happy to be with right before she dumps you. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 9:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/16 "2018-07-04T09:55:55Z")
I don’t think that is right. Phase one was the silent seething. This is phase 2. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 10:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/17 "2018-07-04T10:06:19Z")
> [@T-Minus](#): > > Hey there guys, so I was talking to my girlfriend tonight and I was acting goofy (just laughing and she said this to me: > > “you know when you act goofy, you kinda make me regret going into a relationship with you…” > > I said woah, why do you got to be like that? > > Then she said “I am letting you know how you make me feel sometimes.” > > I feel kind of insulted by that. What are your guys opinion on it? I think she was being honest with you that she doesn’t like you acting “goofy”. As for your response: “why do you got to be like that?” - you can’t tell her how she should feel. Well, obviously you _can_ but you were implying there was something wrong with how she felt about something. She “got to be like that” because that’s how she actually feels. Would you rather she lie to you? As to whether or not this is a deal killer… that’s up to you two. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 10:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/18 "2018-07-04T10:45:35Z")
Sounds to me like she is working herself up to ditch you. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 11:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/19 "2018-07-04T11:03:10Z")
You seem a little cagey about the nature of this ‘goofiness’, to be honest. Goofy implies silliness, which is rarely offensive, as a rule. What exactly were you laughing at? What was in the pictures? What was the article about? They weren’t interpreted as random by her very likely. With more info we might actually be able to help you out, but you haven’t really given us much to go on. But we all, I think, know the uncomfortable feeling of cringing over someone else’s behaviour. Few things are as uncomfortable as being embarrassed for someone else, in my opinion. Perhaps there was a little of that involved? The real question is what are YOU gonna do about it? ---
**Author:** ![actualliberalnotoneofthose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e79b87/32.png) [@actualliberalnotoneofthose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/actualliberalnotoneofthose)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2018, 11:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271/20 "2018-07-04T11:26:28Z")
She was testing you to see if you were a true alpha, bro. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-understand-why-my-girlfriend-said-this-to-me/817271.md?page=2)