# I Don't Want To Hear That!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 25, 2000, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145 "2000-01-25T19:06:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Sylence](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b19c9b/32.png) [@Sylence](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sylence)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/21 "2000-01-25T21:22:00Z")
“HA HA HA HA HA! GUTS GUTS GUTS!” (I’d link to the cartoon this came from but Wally would break my kneecaps.) – Sylence * * * I don’t have an evil side. Just a really, really apathetic one. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/22 "2000-01-25T21:38:00Z")
“Hey, a sponge is missing.” “Oops.” “Hey, guys, this is cool. They’re going to name a disease after me.” * * * The Coyote gnaws … but he does not swallow. ---
**Author:** ![PUNdit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3da27b/32.png) [@PUNdit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PUNdit)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/23 "2000-01-25T21:57:00Z")
“Is there a doctor in the house?” “Damned diarrhea!” “Look at those spots on his lungs. Think we should tell him about them when he wakes up?” “Hey, dummy! You’re standing on the ventilator tube!” “I haven’t seen anything like this since my cadaver at med school.” ---
**Author:** ![meek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce73a5/32.png) [@meek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meek)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/24 "2000-01-25T22:15:00Z")
Nurse, hand me the stapler. \*Sidenote: Did anyone else hear about that psycho doctor who did a “C”-section and **signed his initials** into her belly about two inches high? * * * Forgive me my nonsense as I also forgive the nonsense of those who think they talk sense. – Robert Frost ---
**Author:** ![Narile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@Narile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Narile)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/25 "2000-01-25T22:46:00Z")
## \*Ugh, nobody told me there would be blood involved in this? \>\>Being Chaotic Evil means never having to say your sorry…unless the other guy is bigger than you.\<\< —The dragon observes ---
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/26 "2000-01-25T23:01:00Z")
“Does anyone want to take the scraps home for their dog? No? Okay, it looks like stew for dinner tonight!” StG ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/27 "2000-01-25T23:04:00Z")
“Conga line!” :::inhale::: “Hey Nurse, did you say this was Colombian?” “Guess what? I went to the eye doctor yesterday. He says I’ve got walleye vision.” (from _Buckaroo Bonzai_) “Don’t touch that! You don’t know what it’s connected to.” “Pull my finger!” “Head, shoulders, knees and toes…” “Well, **there’s** a color that Crayola doesn’t make!” ## “I can’t push 'er any faster! She’s about ta blow!” “The quickest way to a man’s heart is through his ribcage.” --anonymous redhead ---
**Author:** ![Globe-trotter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cab0a1/32.png) [@Globe-trotter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Globe-trotter)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/28 "2000-01-25T23:07:00Z")
“Do we have time for a quickie?” “Ah shit, I’m gonna be sick!” “Hey, this is the guy who flunked me twice in med school!” “Get me the vaseline!” “Oh, great! The anaesthesiologist (sp?) is sleeping on the job again!” “Say, this gas is cool.” ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/29 "2000-01-25T23:08:00Z")
Wally: Give me a second, and I’ll change my sig, okay? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![jab1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ee7513/32.png) [@jab1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jab1)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/30 "2000-01-25T23:09:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by smug: > \*\*\*Sidenote: Did anyone else hear about that psycho doctor who did a “C”-section and **signed his initials** into her belly about two inches high? > \*\* I did. It was on every TV news show the day it was reported and in every newspaper the next day out here in L.A. (The doc did it in NYC.) Bill Cosby used to do a routine called “Oops!” on this very subject. * * * \>\< DARWIN \> \_\_ **L\_\_\_L** ---
**Author:** ![manhattan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manhattan/32/7_2.png) [@manhattan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manhattan)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/31 "2000-01-25T23:09:00Z")
Inspired by **Christi** ’s last: "Dammit, Jim! I’m a doctor not a miracle worker! * * * Livin’ on Tums, vitamin E and Rogaine ---
**Author:** ![Ruffian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/71e660/32.png) [@Ruffian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruffian)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/32 "2000-01-25T23:09:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Surgoshan: > \*\*So, you catch the game last night? > \*\* I seriously heard a doctor/surgeon say that when they were repairing a torn tendon. Rather than knock me out completely with a general anesthesia, they’d used a strong sedative–which means I remember being wheeled in, receiving the first few cuts, and wheeled out. Granted, it was just my finger–not open heart surgery–but I distinctly remember the doctors discussing basketball games, teams, etc. Even through my sedated fog I remember thinking, “Hey! Don’t talk about basketball! Fix my finger!” But my finger is fine, so I have no further complaints. 🙂 * * * \Formerly known as LauraRae\ I’m a Raggety Ann in a Barbie Doll world. [Laura’s Stuff and Things](http://members.aol.com/lrconaway) ---
**Author:** ![MrKnowItAll](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrknowitall/32/87_2.png) [@MrKnowItAll](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrKnowItAll)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/33 "2000-01-25T23:11:00Z")
“So, what _is_ the third word that ends with ‘gry’?” * * * Mr. K’s Link of the Month: [Why Plastic Grocery Bags Are Better Than God](http://www.flud.com/ass/bag.html) ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/34 "2000-01-25T23:24:00Z")
Dr. Nick: Hi everybody Everybody: Hi Dr. Nick. “Now if something goes wrong there’s no reason to get the law involved.” * * * Come let us go, I’ve a cask of amontillado. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/35 "2000-01-25T23:26:00Z")
Dammit, keep looking. It HAD to have fallen somewhere! ---
**Author:** ![TheUnforgiven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TheUnforgiven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheUnforgiven)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/36 "2000-01-25T23:48:00Z")
“Eenie, meenie, miney,…mo!” “Mmmm…tastes like chicken!” “Damn it! Who let in the vulture?” “You know, maybe it’s time I got liscensed for this sort of thing.” ---
**Author:** ![AuntiePam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2000, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/37 "2000-01-26T00:13:00Z")
Get that damn cat outta here! ---
**Author:** ![WallyM7](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5e925/32.png) [@WallyM7](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WallyM7)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2000, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/38 "2000-01-26T00:34:00Z")
You guys are awesome. I’m dying over here! 🙂 Don’t stop. ---
**Author:** ![manhattan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manhattan/32/7_2.png) [@manhattan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manhattan)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2000, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/39 "2000-01-26T00:50:00Z")
**WallyM7** : > [@](#): > > I’m dying over here! You may have won your own contest. * * * Livin’ on Tums, vitamin E and Rogaine ---
**Author:** ![lvick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d07c76/32.png) [@lvick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lvick)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2000, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145/40 "2000-01-26T01:04:00Z")
Somebody watch where that lands, we’ll need it later. I hate it when there’s stuff left over. Parts is parts. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-hear-that/13145.md?page=3)