# I don't WANT to smell like Paris! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 8, 2006, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521 "2006-02-08T07:27:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/1 "2006-02-08T07:27:34Z")
Or Britney. Or Jessica. Or Sarah Jessica. Or Kim Phat Baby whatever. Or Gwyneth. Or J-Lo. Or, for that matter, Liz. Obviously, though, this is a selling point, some kind of marketing maneuver that works very, very well, and I am once again on the opposite side of a fad. I am hereby boycotting all fragrances named after a live celebrity! I am convinced that by this action I will alter the course of histery. Y’know, I don’t even care if the fragrances named after these celebs smell _good._ They are tainted by association. But in fact as far as I can tell these eponymous effluvia don’t smell any better than your average, everyday knockoff from Walgreens. Oh well. Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public. Or their sense of smell, either. Truer today than ever before. (Just in case anybody misunderstood, I don’t want to smell like certain cities in Texas and France, either.) ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 7:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/2 "2006-02-08T07:29:37Z")
> [@Hilarity N. Suze](#): > > …I am hereby boycotting all fragrances named after a live celebrity! I am convinced that by this action I will alter the course of histery. …or maybe I will altar the curse of hystory. ---
**Author:** ![Stark\_Raven\_Mad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Stark\_Raven\_Mad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stark_Raven_Mad)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 9:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/3 "2006-02-08T09:02:30Z")
I think Sarah Jessica Parker’s Lovely is a decent scent (and I am neither American, nor “public” - I have some thirty scents in my collection and I’ve sniffed many, many more). Even Britney’s Curious isn’t horrible, just really, really fruity. If you liked bubble gum, you’d like this. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 9:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/4 "2006-02-08T09:24:18Z")
Yi, if there’s a “Curious” Britney that means she’s got more than one! I got a whole bunch of samples, half of which were celeb scents, and my Britney was something about a dream. You’re right, it didn’t stink. It wasn’t really exceptional. The one I had kinda smelled like grape drink. But it’s the names! (Really I have nothing against Sarah Jessica Parker. Or any of them. I just deplore this marketing trend.) ---
**Author:** ![Marlitharn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/779978/32.png) [@Marlitharn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marlitharn)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 9:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/5 "2006-02-08T09:54:15Z")
Didn’t Miss Piggy have her own perfume some years back? That would be a scent I’d be proud to wear, if I wore perfume, which I don’t because it makes my eyes burny. ---
**Author:** ![Stark\_Raven\_Mad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Stark\_Raven\_Mad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stark_Raven_Mad)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 10:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/6 "2006-02-08T10:38:20Z")
The endorsement crap is horrible, I know. But the sad truth is that attaching a random, well-known name to a scent will sell it. Unless, of course, that name is Donald Trump. ---
**Author:** ![Stark\_Raven\_Mad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Stark\_Raven\_Mad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stark_Raven_Mad)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 10:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/7 "2006-02-08T10:42:23Z")
> [@Marlitharn](#): > > Didn’t Miss Piggy have her own perfume some years back? That would be a scent I’d be proud to wear, if I wore perfume, which I don’t because it makes my eyes burny. [Yep](http://www.muppetcentral.com/news/1998/103098.shtml). And there was also a [Spongbob](http://i2.ebayimg.com/02/i/04/f5/f4/94_2.JPG) cologne. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 10:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/8 "2006-02-08T10:58:45Z")
> [@Stark Raven Mad](#): > > I think Sarah Jessica Parker’s Lovely is a decent scent It would be more honest to name it ‘equine’ though, IMO. ---
**Author:** ![parthenokinesis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/cc9497/32.png) [@parthenokinesis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/parthenokinesis)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/9 "2006-02-08T13:38:35Z")
As a bloke, I’m quite tempted to get me some [Cumming the Fragrance](http://www.cummingthefragrance.com/html/collection.html). It almost seems like a parody of the whole signature scent deal, and the entendres in the product names are aparently his revenge on the world for growing up with the name Cumming, but I have a gut feel that the scent is probably pretty good. > [@cummingthefragrance.com](#): > > A sexy, fun and mischievous fragrance with top notes of: Bergamot, Black Pepper, Scotch Pine, Whiskey. Core notes of: Cigar, Heather, Douglas Fir, Rubber. Base notes of: Leather, Highland Mud, Peat Fire & White Truffle. Who doesn’t want to smell like whiskey, leather, rubber, and cigars? ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/10 "2006-02-08T13:54:06Z")
I’m afraid to know what Paris smells like… stale alcohol, cigarette smoke, burnt rubber and bodily fluids? The mind reels. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/11 "2006-02-08T14:07:36Z")
There used to be an ad for Caswell-Massey colognes that had, in big bold type: **Smell like George Washington!** Our first pres. was a customer at C-M (which has old roots), and always ordered the same fragrance, for which they still have the recipe (or so their advertising states), so you apparently really _could_ smell like the big GW. I note that, if this is all on the level, he actually _used_ the stuff, and didn’t endorse it. That places him way above Paris, britney, and company. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/12 "2006-02-08T14:19:48Z")
Caswell-Massey page on Washington: [http://www.caswellmassey.com/content/ourcompany/gateway/article/articlemain.jsp?itemID=22&FoldID=21](http://www.caswellmassey.com/content/ourcompany/gateway/article/articlemain.jsp?itemID=22&FoldID=21) ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/13 "2006-02-08T14:32:11Z")
> [@Stark Raven Mad](#): > > [Yep](http://www.muppetcentral.com/news/1998/103098.shtml). And there was also a [Spongbob](http://i2.ebayimg.com/02/i/04/f5/f4/94_2.JPG) cologne. but…smelling like paris, you wouldn’t smell like spongebob… you’d smell like bob’s spooge. yeah, i’m happy over this one. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/14 "2006-02-08T14:36:00Z")
Personally, I cannot wear perfume becaue my nose is so sensitive all I smell is the alcohol base to it after about 20min. on my skin. I’ve spent thousands of dollars in my youth trying to find a signature scent. I want to be a part of this crowd. ( Not the celebrity perfumery stuff) but it pains me to even attempt a walk through the perfume section at stores. I would love to get a chance to whiff **cummings** which sounds like it would be a veyr unique smell. A manly smell. Not for me, maybe for Mr. Ujest. Or just for whiffing. Thanks for the heads up on this smelly. I also am partial to a nice bay rum smelly. ---
**Author:** ![cruel\_butterfly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5daacb/32.png) [@cruel\_butterfly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cruel_butterfly)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/15 "2006-02-08T16:09:28Z")
> [@ShibbOleth](#): > > I’m afraid to know what Paris smells like… stale alcohol, cigarette smoke, burnt rubber and bodily fluids? The mind reels. All kidding aside, I bought the second incarnation of Paris Hilton’s perfume for my stepdaughter for Christmas. I bought it from the girl at the counter without sampling it. I just knew that if it had Paris Hilton’s name and/or picture on the packaging, my stepdaughter would love it no matter what. She’s sixteen and thoroughly star-struck, after all. Surprisingly, it smells pretty good. I’ve even sneaked a few spritzes when my stepdaughter isn’t home. ---
**Author:** ![Stark\_Raven\_Mad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Stark\_Raven\_Mad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stark_Raven_Mad)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/16 "2006-02-08T16:16:01Z")
> [@parthenokinesis](#): > > Who doesn’t want to smell like whiskey, leather, rubber, and cigars? Some of the most interesting scents ever composed have leather (Serge Lutens’ Daim Blond, Chanel’s Cuir de Russie, Piguet’s Bandit), rubber (Thierry Mugler’s Angel for Men) and tobacco (D&G’s Pour Homme, Creed’s Tabarome) notes in them. **Shirley** , you might want to look into Frederic Malle’s Musc Ravageur, an incredibly potent musk oriental (vanilla, amber, a bit of spicy stuff). If you email them at their website they’ll send you two or three 5ml sample sprays. Ask for Musk Ravageur and Noir Epices. Or, if you want even stranger stuff, Comme des Garcons makes some pretty out-there scents. Their Incense series is very wearable, and their Odeurs 53 and 71 have such notes as “Freshness of Oxygen, Flash of Metal, Fire Energy, Washing drying in the wind.” and “Electricity, Metal, Office, Mineral, Dust on a hot light bulb, photocopier toner, Hot metal, Toaster, fountain pen ink, Pencil Shavings, The salty taste of a battery” > [@](#): > > I note that, if this is all on the level, he actually used the stuff, and didn’t endorse it. Creed’s stuff is a celebrity favorite. Green Irish Tweed, of which Cool Water is a poor imitation, is one of their best-selling fragrances. There’s also Spring Flower, composed for Audrey Hepburn, Bois du Portugal, which Frank Sinatra was into, and even one named Jasmin Impératrice Eugénie, although I’m not quite sure why. Cumming, by the way, is one of those love-it-or-hate-it scents. IMO it smells like old jackets near a shoe rack, which is exactly what the list of notes suggests. ---
**Author:** ![dangermom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e274bd/32.png) [@dangermom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dangermom)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/17 "2006-02-08T19:32:27Z")
Oh. I was thinking of Paris, the city. What does Paris smell like? Bread and traffic, I’m thinking? Some river smell, too? ---
**Author:** ![Tentacle\_Monster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ba9def/32.png) [@Tentacle\_Monster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tentacle_Monster)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/18 "2006-02-08T19:36:44Z")
While I’m sad that she’s gone, I’m really glad Divine wasn’t around long enough to get her own perfume. ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/19 "2006-02-08T19:37:41Z")
You forgot about Shania, for those who buy their fragrances at Wal-Mart. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521/20 "2006-02-08T19:48:19Z")
> [@Stark Raven Mad](#): > > **Shirley** , you might want to look into Frederic Malle’s Musc Ravageur, an incredibly potent musk oriental (vanilla, amber, a bit of spicy stuff). If you email them at their website they’ll send you two or three 5ml sample sprays. Ask for Musk Ravageur and Noir Epices. Or, if you want even stranger stuff, Comme des Garcons makes some pretty out-there scents. Their Incense series is very wearable, and their Odeurs 53 and 71 have such notes as > > “Freshness of Oxygen, Flash of Metal, Fire Energy, Washing drying in the wind.” > > and > > “Electricity, Metal, Office, Mineral, Dust on a hot light bulb, photocopier toner, Hot metal, Toaster, fountain pen ink, Pencil Shavings, The salty taste of a battery” > > Creed’s stuff is a celebrity favorite. Green Irish Tweed, of which Cool Water is a poor imitation, is one of their best-selling fragrances. There’s also Spring Flower, composed for Audrey Hepburn, Bois du Portugal, which Frank Sinatra was into, and even one named Jasmin Impératrice Eugénie, although I’m not quite sure why. > > Cumming, by the way, is one of those love-it-or-hate-it scents. IMO it smells like old jackets near a shoe rack, which is exactly what the list of notes suggests. Thanks for the suggestions! They are noted and I shall email the company! YAY! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-dont-want-to-smell-like-paris/343521.md?page=2)