# I farted and my dogs barked

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [June 13, 2004, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063 "2004-06-13T02:00:13Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![store-clerk-slacker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@store-clerk-slacker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/store-clerk-slacker)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/1 "2004-06-13T02:00:13Z")

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So I’m sitting here reading some threads, minding my own business, and I start to feel a twinge in my tummy. I kind of realize what’s about to happen…I’ve been feeling gassy today Sure enough I passed gas, pooted, tooted…I farted. No one heard or knew but me, or so I thought.  
Dogs start barking like crazy…Fiancee starts yelling at the dogs “Hey! What are you barking at?” Shyly I tell him I know why and explain that it was just a tiny squeak, I only knew it happened because I felt it, I didn’t realize that they had heard it too.

When he started laughing at me, I got all embarassed, and then he said this… “If you don’t post that on the SD…I will!” :eek:

:red face:Here it is. I posted it.

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**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/2 "2004-06-13T02:24:02Z")

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> [@store-clerk-slacker](#):
>
> Fiancee starts yelling at the dogs “Hey! What are you barking at?”

I also shouted, “Shutup you damn freakshow!” and “What the hell is up your ass now?!” (This is the same pup who barked when the phone rang when we first brought her home.)

Little did I know she was protecting me, warning me in the only way she knew how. Saying in dog-language, “Hey, buddy, open a window! Leave the room! Light a match! _Do something!_”

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**Author:** ![legion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/838e76/32.png) [@legion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/legion)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/3 "2004-06-13T02:35:30Z")

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You girls! OK, so you farted. Big deal. You make it sound like some kinda once in a lifetime experience!

I put that down to lack of confidence. I can’t imagine what life must be like to deny yourself the odd “arse trumpet”.

Real trumpeters can, it is claimed, through timbre, pitch, sustainability and odours, read each others true thoughts and feelings better than with body language!

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**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/4 "2004-06-13T03:01:37Z")

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> [@legion](#):
>
> You girls! OK, so you farted. Big deal. You make it sound like some kinda once in a lifetime experience!

Yeah, I can’t believe she acts all embarrassed about a fart that made the dog bark. Most nights she sits around and lets 'em loose like the scene in _Blazing Saddles_ with all the cowboys sitting around the campfire eating beans.

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**Author:** ![yellowval](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/919ad9/32.png) [@yellowval](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yellowval)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/5 "2004-06-13T03:03:29Z")

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As long as you didn’t shart\*, it’s all good.

\*shart=I tried to fart, and pooped a little.=yucky

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**Author:** ![JavaMaven1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/cab0a1/32.png) [@JavaMaven1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JavaMaven1)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/6 "2004-06-13T03:15:53Z")

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My mother’s dog, Maxwell, _hated_ it when you blew raspberries at him. Eventually, if there was ever a fart noise in the room, it would spook him and make him run off to the next room.

Yes, even if _he_ farted. Yes, the dog was afraid of his own farts.

😃

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**Author:** ![legion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/838e76/32.png) [@legion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/legion)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/7 "2004-06-13T03:21:54Z")

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> [@Crunchy Frog](#):
>
> Yeah, I can’t believe she acts all embarrassed about a fart that made the dog bark. Most nights she sits around and lets 'em loose like the scene in _Blazing Saddles_ with all the cowboys sitting around the campfire eating beans.

If you took the stick out of your arse, maybe you could too. 😉

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**Author:** ![Albert\_Rose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de053/32.png) [@Albert\_Rose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Albert_Rose)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/8 "2004-06-13T04:13:45Z")

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Pull my finger.

_woof_

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**Author:** ![Ruby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/13edae/32.png) [@Ruby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruby)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/9 "2004-06-13T04:52:02Z")

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Ha! We have a 7# Yorkie. One day he was sitting on my husband’s shoulder on the couch and let one rip. Dog farts are bad enough, but this one was within 6" of his nose. I laughed for a week remembering the look on hubby’s face.

I got the dog back, though. One day he was sitting on my lap and I passed a little gas. He took one look at me, jumped down, and ran back to the bedroom. 😃

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**Author:** ![Fritz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c57346/32.png) [@Fritz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fritz)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/10 "2004-06-13T06:02:44Z")

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Girls fart???

:eek:

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**Author:** ![Phnord\_Prephect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/df705f/32.png) [@Phnord\_Prephect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phnord_Prephect)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/11 "2004-06-13T12:11:08Z")

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Girls don’t fart! Only skeevy stoners fart!

_pfft_ :eek: 😃

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**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 12:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/12 "2004-06-13T12:36:01Z")

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You realise this means you probably farted _ultrasonically_ :eek:

You may not have heard it, but dogs can pick up those high frequencies…

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**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/13 "2004-06-13T15:20:10Z")

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> [@Colophon](#):
>
> You realise this means you probably farted _ultrasonically_ :eek:
> 
> You may not have heard it, but dogs can pick up those high frequencies…

**Colophon** has to be right. I was wondering if it was one of those loud bare-assed-sitting-on-naugahide farts that sounds like a large truck with the Jake Brake on: _BRAP-BRAP-BRAP-BRAP-BRAP_😃

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**Author:** ![store-clerk-slacker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@store-clerk-slacker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/store-clerk-slacker)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/14 "2004-06-13T15:46:53Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> Originally posted by **danceswithcats**
> 
> I was wondering if it was one of those loud bare-assed-sitting-on-naugahide farts that sounds like a large truck with the Jake Brake on: BRAP-BRAP-BRAP-BRAP-BRAP

Actually no it. I was really kind of suprised that they reacted they way they did. It was more of a sqeak I guess. I think it had to do with the way I was sitting in my chair and the position of the earth at that very moment. 😃

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**Author:** ![GraceTX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c4cdca/32.png) [@GraceTX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraceTX)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/15 "2004-06-13T16:25:16Z")

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That’s hilarious. Passing gas doesn’t seem to frighten my cats. I think they think it’s funny. Especially since one of them likes to get on my pillow and fart in my face when I’m sleeping.

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**Author:** ![noname](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/58f4c7/32.png) [@noname](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/noname)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/16 "2004-06-13T17:53:20Z")

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> [@Grace](#):
>
> That’s hilarious. Passing gas doesn’t seem to frighten my cats. I think they think it’s funny. Especially since one of them likes to get on my pillow and fart in my face when I’m sleeping.

:eek: I hope you are in the habit of washing your face when you wake up. With soap. Twice. :dubious:

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**Author:** ![nocturnal\_tick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@nocturnal\_tick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nocturnal_tick)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/17 "2004-06-13T19:10:56Z")

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Hold on a sec… almost…stopped…laughing… There.

Thankyou so much for that. At least now you know that a decent burglar alarm would be the pup and some carefully placed whoopee cushions. 😃

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**Author:** ![flamingbananas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f4b2a3/32.png) [@flamingbananas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flamingbananas)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/18 "2004-06-13T19:19:59Z")

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Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha. Funnist. Thread. Ever.

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**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/19 "2004-06-13T19:53:58Z")

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Be of good cheer, \*\* store-clerk-slacker\*\* ! You are merely carrying on an old Belgian musical tradition.

Ask your **Frog** about “Le Petomaine”. 😃

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**Author:** ![store-clerk-slacker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@store-clerk-slacker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/store-clerk-slacker)\
**Post date:** [June 13, 2004, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063/20 "2004-06-13T20:55:26Z")

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I am glad that everyone has gotten a good laugh off of me. I know for the months that I have mostly lurked here, all of your embarassing stories have put a smile or two on my face. 😃 of course **Crunchy** threatening me to post this motivated me just a little

It’s nice to share and bond!

now would be the point when you all share\*\* your\*\* embarassing fart stories

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-farted-and-my-dogs-barked/250063.md?page=2)
