# I finally throw a patient out of my office **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 21, 2003, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985 "2003-03-21T02:59:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/21 "2003-03-21T15:12:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jadis \* > Hail, fellow SK fan! šŸ˜ƒ SK? I was thinking William Golding, Lord of the Flies. What reference am I missing? ---
**Author:** ![KarlGauss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/karlgauss/32/3713_2.png) [@KarlGauss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGauss)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/22 "2003-03-21T15:42:40Z")
Lord of the Flies it was (Piggy). But Iā€™ll accept the ā€œhailā€ in any case! ---
**Author:** ![Slip\_Mahoney](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47774/32.png) [@Slip\_Mahoney](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slip_Mahoney)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/23 "2003-03-21T17:04:41Z")
Doc, did it ever occur to you that the kid was on the level? Maybe the psycho jailers _did_ alter his med history so he couldnā€™t go to camp. And anyway, heā€™s probably in jail because he was framed. I wouldnā€™t be surprised if you were in on it. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/24 "2003-03-21T17:12:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by particlewill \* > \*\*I just want all to know that I wasnā€™t coming down on the good Doctors. I was just curious about the HIPPA regs. The way it was described to us, even discussing general patient information to people without a need to know was frowned apon and possibly fineable. \*\* I meant to address that in my earlier post, but it was close to my bedtime and I forgot. A lot of times companies will have rules far in excess of federal/state regulations to give themselves some leeway. That way, employees can sort of bend the rules, as they invariably will, without doing anything actually illegal. Itā€™s a cya thing. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/25 "2003-03-21T18:46:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by elfbabe \* > \*\*Oh. Andā€¦uhā€¦ hi, Dad. ā€¦ Dadgop? > > I SWEAR Iā€™m not stalking you. Itā€™s just a natural move to check out the rest of the board after reading the blimp story, you know? \*\* Hi kid. You could have used your full name, **Elfbabe the Mercotan** , ya know! šŸ™‚ Glad to have you on board. Howā€™s life in my favorite city? As for HIPPA, theyā€™re some of the craziest regs Iā€™ve ever read. Technically I think anything you do in the field of healthcare will violate them somehow. **casdave** , youā€™re probably right. But since he didnā€™t try to bribe or threaten me (talking about his lawyer complaining or suing doesnā€™t rise to the level of a threat) I cut some slack to the sucker, for better or worse. ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/26 "2003-03-21T18:47:31Z")
So uh, **Elfbabe** - forgive my being slow, but are you Qadā€™s Daughter? ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/27 "2003-03-21T19:00:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Phlosphr \* > \*\*So uh, **Elfbabe** - forgive my being slow, but are you Qadā€™s Daughter? \*\* ā€œGAD, HOLMES! However did you deduce that?ā€ :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/28 "2003-03-21T19:03:29Z")
elfbabe said: > [@](#): > > Oh. Andā€¦uhā€¦ hi, Dad. ā€¦ Dadgop? ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/29 "2003-03-21T19:07:59Z")
That and her low post count, and she said she has been hearing his stories for yearsā€¦ wrong deduction I guess?? Can you see where Iā€™m coming from though? ---
**Author:** ![KarlGauss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/karlgauss/32/3713_2.png) [@KarlGauss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGauss)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/30 "2003-03-21T19:11:30Z")
Was whooshing sound a SCUD? ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/31 "2003-03-21T19:28:00Z")
No **phlos** , your deductive skills are fine. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/32 "2003-03-21T19:35:58Z")
I very rarely get mad at patients and have not yet asked one to leave in such blunt terms. Working in the ER, I see my share of manics and have had two leave on meā€¦ ā€œWhy are you asking about my periods? The pain is in my belly. Iā€™ve had a hysterectomy. Iā€™m going to find a real doctor.ā€ šŸ™‚ ā€œI said the pain was over my heart. So why are you asking me if Iā€™ve ever had an electrocardiogram? Any competent doctor would do one, and Iā€™ve had thousands of them.ā€ šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/33 "2003-03-21T19:44:44Z")
Well, **Dr\_Paprika** , it was the first time Iā€™ve done that, in 20 years of patient care. But there was nothing really left to say. Iā€™d done the exam and the education and recommendation part, and heā€™d heard it even if heā€™d dismissed it. Now he was just doing a dance. And if heā€™d kept it up, he would have talked his way into significant trouble. ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/34 "2003-03-21T20:04:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Qadgop the Mercotan \* > \*\*It was just another day practicing medicine in a maximum-security prison. \*\* _Great_ opening line! It got me to read the rest all by itself. Did you ever take a journalistic writing course? \*\* > [@](#): > > Not all that different from private practice, but my patients are, on the average, more polite.\*\* :eek: {{Poor **Quadgop**!}} \*\* > [@](#): > > ā€œChange my record! Take out all that stuff about my asthma! Do that for me!ā€ ā€œWhy would I do that?ā€ ā€œSoā€™s I can go to boot camp and get out of this fucking prison! Just do it!ā€\*\* If you had an artistic bent, you could make a painting of this scene, a la Norman Rockwell. Title it: ā€œReality of Life Dawns on Stupid Scumbagā€ \*\* > [@](#): > > But as Iā€™ve pondered the whole thing, running it over in my mind, I realize just how big a narcissist the kid is, and also what pissed me off the most: Heā€™d tried to get me to pity him, heā€™d tried to intimidate and threaten me with his lawyer, but **he never did try to _bribe_ me!!!** Turkey\*\* I applaud your ethics, **Quadgop** šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![Skammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skammer/32/143_2.png) [@Skammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skammer)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2003, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/35 "2003-03-21T20:31:13Z")
Can I just point out that itā€™s HIPAA (one P, two Aā€™s): the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act. Not like the big semiaquatic animal with the big mouth. Great story **Quadgop**! ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2003, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/36 "2003-03-22T02:12:59Z")
Another fine **QtM** story! Gotta say the reg banning asthmatics at boot camp is probably right on the money. Iā€™m a ā€œmild, intermittant asthmaticā€ myself, Iā€™ve even gone years without a wheeze, yet I have still landed in the ER twice from sudden and unexpected attacks. In a boot camp situation, where the assumption might be the person is ā€œslackingā€ rather than in real distress, an attack might easily progress into a critical situation before the folks running the place realize ā€œOh FUCK, he ISNā€™T faking!!!ā€ Letā€™s get real - this used to be a problem in high school, much less a prison boot camp. If the Bad Boy doesnā€™t want to be in prison maybe he should stop committing crimes, ay? Some very bad memories of being called ā€œlazyā€, ā€œslackingā€, ā€œyou have a bad attitudeā€, accusations of not trying, threats to call parents, etc. etc. when the real problem was _I couldnā€™t fucking breathe_!!! ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2003, 6:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985/37 "2003-03-22T06:36:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Broomstick \* > \*\*Another fine **QtM** story! > > \ If the Bad Boy doesnā€™t want to be in prison maybe he should stop committing crimes, ay? > > \\*\* Um, just to pick a nit, itā€™s actually ā€œehā€, not ā€œayā€. You wanna sound like a Canadian, you gotta do it right, eh? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-finally-throw-a-patient-out-of-my-office/162985.md?page=1)