# I Found Jesus **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 1, 2013, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730 "2013-09-01T15:04:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2013, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/21 "2013-09-01T20:43:47Z")
> [@SiXSwordS](#): > > Next time be careful where you roll that thing [TO](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D5ogSmH8M84)! (Starts at about the :20 mark.) DAY-um. Did you search for boulder videos, or have you been waiting all this time for a chance to see that video? ---
**Author:** ![kittenblue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ba8739/32.png) [@kittenblue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kittenblue)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2013, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/22 "2013-09-01T22:55:28Z")
Do you ever remember owning Jesus, and losing him, or is this just something that completely appeared out of nowhere, or was from a previous tenant of your place? ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2013, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/23 "2013-09-01T22:59:22Z")
> [@IvoryTowerDenizen](#): > > Did you search for boulder videos, or have you been waiting all this time for a chance to see that video? I’m always watching, my son… or daughter (and Yes, I should already know your gender if I’m always watching, but there is a LOT I choose NOT to watch and a LOT of what you’ve been doing lately falls into that category so unless you want to go there just let the gender issues go for awhile 'k). ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2013, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/24 "2013-09-01T23:16:54Z")
> [@kittenblue](#): > > Do you ever remember owning Jesus, and losing him, or is this just something that completely appeared out of nowhere, or was from a previous tenant of your place? My gf has owned this house for 18ish years. I moved in 4 years ago after selling my house. Neither of us ever saw Christ before. Teensy creepy. ---
**Author:** ![deltasigma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e5b9ba/32.png) [@deltasigma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/deltasigma)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2013, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/25 "2013-09-01T23:23:31Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > My gf has owned this house for 18ish years. I moved in 4 years ago after selling my house. Neither of us ever saw Christ before. Teensy creepy. In that case, there might be sentient life under there. Wait 3 days and put it back. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Battle\_Pope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@Battle\_Pope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Battle_Pope)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2013, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/26 "2013-09-01T23:28:03Z")
We must all follow him, carrying a 'fridge on our backs! ---
**Author:** ![Girlundone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/919ad9/32.png) [@Girlundone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girlundone)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2013, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/27 "2013-09-02T00:08:59Z")
Actually, he’s hiding from all the religious fanatics. He wants you to put him back under the fridge. He told me so. ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2013, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/28 "2013-09-02T01:34:56Z")
> [@Battle\_Pope](#): > > We must all follow him, carrying a 'fridge on our backs! He is truly the Messiah. You carry the fridge. I’ll keep a dessicated carrot peel and a 1969 penny in my pocket. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2013, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/29 "2013-09-02T01:36:06Z")
> [@SiXSwordS](#): > > I’m always watching, my son… or daughter (and Yes, I should already know your gender if I’m always watching, but there is a LOT I choose NOT to watch and a LOT of what you’ve been doing lately falls into that category so unless you want to go there just let the gender issues go for awhile 'k). Slowly slipping out from under the [del]Eye of Sauron[/del] Jesus’ watchful love. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2013, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/30 "2013-09-02T02:46:20Z")
I once shot Jesus in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas, I’ll never know. ---
**Author:** ![Cheshire\_Human](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Cheshire\_Human](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheshire_Human)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2013, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/31 "2013-09-02T18:49:38Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > At first I thought the puddle was Jesus’ tears and was quite excited,… Wrong orifice, dude. He was saying: “No! Piss on _YOU!_” Trust me on this one. I have His number on speed-dial, so I asked Him. It’s to be Hell for you once you croak. Sorry. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2013, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/32 "2013-09-02T20:21:08Z")
> [@Cheshire\_Human](#): > > It’s to be Hell for you once you croak. > > Sorry. Well, in heaven I’d be amongst strangers. I sent pics of Jesus to my brother and our house/pet sitter. They have spent some time here and I figured Jesus might be theirs and they are missing him. Nope. Hmmm. ---
**Author:** ![deltasigma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e5b9ba/32.png) [@deltasigma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/deltasigma)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2013, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/33 "2013-09-02T20:30:02Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Well, in heaven I’d be amongst strangers. > > I sent pics of Jesus to my brother and our house/pet sitter. They have spent some time here and I figured Jesus might be theirs and they are missing him. Nope. Hmmm. [Put up flyers](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/Puppet-Jesus.jpg) 🆒 edit - [this is more humorous though](http://rlv.zcache.com/i_found_this_humerus_flyer-rc90830ff55f445f1b6dbf0b62599b4b2_vgvs0_8byvr_324.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Renifer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/71c47a/32.png) [@Renifer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Renifer)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2013, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/34 "2013-09-02T23:56:20Z")
Great, now I’ve got a picture in my head about Jesus peering out from under the refrigerator like the girl from _The Evil Dead_. Someone please make this the next urban legend. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2013, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/35 "2013-09-03T00:23:54Z")
I thought He was at [Walgreens](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v220/Guinastasia/Lulz/21519_368676629887292_1994165551_n_zps4dcb5137.jpg)? ---
**Author:** ![picunurse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2013, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/36 "2013-09-03T01:32:58Z")
Now I’m going to have to watch [Cool Hand Luke](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dG9tuuznL1Y) to get the song outa my head. [sub] “I don’t care if it rains or freezes…”[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Pine\_Fresh\_Scent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/43a26b/32.png) [@Pine\_Fresh\_Scent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pine_Fresh_Scent)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2013, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/37 "2013-09-03T02:38:51Z")
Revelation 3:3 _Remember therefore how thou hast received and heard, and hold fast, and repent. If therefore thou shalt not watch, I will come on thee as a thief, and thou shalt not know what hour I will come upon thee._ “Well, I would have if thou hadst not found me beneath thy fridge.” ---
**Author:** ![the\_diego](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@the\_diego](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_diego)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2013, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/38 "2013-09-03T08:14:30Z")
Before he was a superstar? ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2013, 9:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/39 "2013-09-03T09:31:46Z")
I had Jesus IN my fridge, except it was Jesus what’s-that-smell. ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2013, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730/40 "2013-09-03T12:06:09Z")
He’s your own Personal Jesus. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-found-jesus/667730.md?page=3)