# I friggin' love beer. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** beer\ **Created:** [January 20, 2005, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775 "2005-01-20T20:15:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/1 "2005-01-20T20:15:13Z")
I just love it. All of it. While I appreciate some beer more than others, there really isn’t a beer I don’t like. I love beer in the morning with eggs. I love it at lunch. I love beer at supper. I love beer before going to bed at night. I love beer watching TV. I love beer listening to the radio. I love beer sitting on my porch. I love beer driving in my car (but you need to be careful with this). I love beer reading the paper. I love to finish only half my beer, leave it sitting out all night and drink the remaining warm, stale half before I brush my teeth in the morning. I love to stuff it in a chicken’s butt and cook him. I love to pour it in a pot with lamb and onions and watch it foam up when I make chili. I love to submerged it in ice water as the best method of cooling it. I love fishing through a cooler to find which beer I want the most. I love getting it out of the fridge. I love using a bottle opener on it. I love twisting caps off. I love popping the top of cans. I love twisting the cap off a 40 and pouring it into a frosty glass. I love getting it on tap in a bar. I love getting a bottle in a bar. I love the word “BEER”. There’s nothing about beer I don’t love. Last night I decided not to have a beer before bed because I’m trying to cut back a little, and I’ve been sitting at work all day feeling bad for the beer in my fridge. . . like I forgot to kiss my wife goodbye or something. This thread is my way of making it up to beer. Sorry, beer. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/2 "2005-01-20T20:24:01Z")
Aw, man…that was **beautiful**! ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/3 "2005-01-20T20:28:46Z")
:: standing ovation :: That brought a tear to my eye. Have I got a [song](http://www.lyricsfreak.com/t/tom-t.-hall/138704.html) for you. \*In some of my songs I have casually mentioned The fact that I like to drink beer This little song is more to the point Roll out the barrel and lend me your ears (chorus) I like beer. it makes me a jolly good fellow I like beer. it helps me unwind and sometimes it makes me feel mellow (makes him feel mellow) Whiskey’s too rough, champagne costs too much, vodka puts my mouth in gear This little refrain should help me explain as a matter of fact I like beer (he likes beer) \* Tom T. Hall ---
**Author:** ![romansperson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/romansperson/32/17100_2.png) [@romansperson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/romansperson)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/4 "2005-01-20T20:31:51Z")
If the ocean was beer And I was a duck I’d swim to the bottom And never come up. ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/5 "2005-01-20T20:33:42Z")
All glory to beer. To bad I can’t embed the Hypno Toad sound with this post. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/6 "2005-01-20T20:40:47Z")
But I love this 19th-century music-hall song: > [@](#): > > Let me sing you a song of a gargle, > A lotion to me very dear; > I refer to that grand lubricator, > That wonderful tonic called beer, beer, beer! > > Beer, beer, glorious beer, > Fill yourself right up to here; > Don’t be afraid of it, drink till you’re made of it, > Drink of your old lager beer! > Drink a great deal of it, make a whole meal of it, > Come, boys, a rousing good cheer, _hurrah!_ > Up with the sale of it, down with a pail of it, > Glorious, glorious beer! > > It’s the daddy of all lubricators, > A very fine thing for your neck; > Can be used as a lotion or gargle, > For people of every sect. > They say there’s a goddess of wine, boys, > But is there a goddess of beer? > If there is, let us drink to her name, boys, > And wish that we had her right here! > > Beer, beer, glorious beer, > Fill yourself right up to here; > Don’t be afraid of it, drink till you’re made of it, > Drink of your old lager beer! > Drink a great deal of it, make a whole meal of it, > Come, boys, a rousing good cheer, _hurrah!_ > Up with the sale of it, down with a pail of it, > Glorious, glorious beer! ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/7 "2005-01-20T20:46:59Z")
I, too, love beer. Whether I’m downing something pricey from some European hamlet with a name that I couldn’t ever hope to pronounce, or if I’m sitting in a back alley downing a forty of Mickey’s, it’s all tasty. Heineken (fuck that shit! Pabst Blue Ribbon!), Modelo, Rolling Rock, Newcastle, Arrogant Bastard, Sierra Nevada… I love the feeling of massive glugs of beer travelling down my throat. I love upending a half-finished forty and leaving the bottle empty, completely drained, in one massive chug. I love clinking bottles. I love the way my buddy Flip pops beers open with the bottom of his lighter. I love smoking a stogie and tipping back a cold one. Yeah. Beer good. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/8 "2005-01-20T20:55:31Z")
[Polka standard](http://beer.artcon.ru/songs/mp3/in_heaven_there_is_no_beer.mp3) _In heaven, there is no beer that’s why we drink it here And are gone from here Our friends will be drinkin’ all our beer_ ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/9 "2005-01-20T20:57:14Z")
dang. I left out the “we’re” from “And when we are gone from here” ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/10 "2005-01-20T21:18:06Z")
[Beer fights cancer!](http://www.newscientist.com/article.ns?id=dn6895) (OK, non-alcoholic beer, so far. In mice. Shut up and let me celebrate.) I love beer so much, I brew it at home. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/11 "2005-01-20T21:21:48Z")
Well, I was going to write some really great stuff about beer, but I think I will just go have one instead. In the immortal words of Benjamin Franklin…“Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.” ---
**Author:** ![The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/12 "2005-01-20T21:40:46Z")
Beer, ale, braggot, small beer, gruits, groaning ale, ambers, IPAs…join us brethren and sistren in the joy of John Barleycorn. \ ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/13 "2005-01-20T22:05:09Z")
The only thing better than beer is… MORE BEER! ---
**Author:** ![Spoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@Spoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoke)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/14 "2005-01-20T22:14:31Z")
> [@romansperson](#): > > If the ocean was beer > And I was a duck > I’d swim to the bottom > And never come up. If the ocean was whiskey And I was a duck I’d dive to the bottom And _drink my way up_ - (“Rye Whiskey” - Traditional - as sung by Gid Tanner and the Skillet Lickers c. 1927) But yeah, Id rather have beer, too. ---
**Author:** ![Try\_As\_I\_Might](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea666f/32.png) [@Try\_As\_I\_Might](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Try_As_I_Might)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/15 "2005-01-20T22:15:40Z")
DO RE MI DRINK, by Homer J. Simpson. _ahem_ La la la la… _ahem_ DO… the stuff… that buys me beer… RAY… the guy that sells me beer… ME… the guy… who drinks the beer, FAR… a long way to get beer… SO… I’ll have another beer… LA… I’ll have another beer… TEA… no thanks, I’m drinking beer… That will bring us back to… (Looks into an empty glass) D’OH! Beer. hmmmmmmmm. beer. Stella Artois, Becks, St. Pauli, Grolsch, Guiness, Harp, Bass, Newcastle… “Beer is living proof that God loves us, and wants us to be happy” B. Franklin ---
**Author:** ![YellowTail](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/b5ac83/32.png) [@YellowTail](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YellowTail)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/16 "2005-01-20T23:50:11Z")
There’s a lake of stew And of whiskey too You can paddle all around 'em In a big canoe Big Rock Candy Mountain Mmmmm … beer. At least my love for _you_ will never die! --Homer Beer. Helping ugly people have sex for over a hundred years. I’m like a chocaholic but with booze. 🙂🙂🙂 I’m partial to Fat Tire these days. A lovely medium ale. It’s brewed here in Colorado. Can you guys get it? I’ve seen it for sale in Missouri. I even got my cousin hooked on it. ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/17 "2005-01-20T23:56:38Z")
“Ah one Bourbon, one Scotch, and one beyahhhh!” Screw that, just give me the beer! ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2005, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/18 "2005-01-20T23:58:43Z")
I’ll take **Loopydude** ’s bourbon and scotch! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Try\_As\_I\_Might](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea666f/32.png) [@Try\_As\_I\_Might](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Try_As_I_Might)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2005, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/19 "2005-01-21T00:01:08Z")
“Beer: the cause of and solution to all of life’s problems.” From, once again, the immortal Homer Simpson ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2005, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775/20 "2005-01-21T00:05:03Z")
> [@](#): > > ou are the one who waters the malt > set on the ground, > The noble dogs keep away even the potentates, > Ninkasi, you are the one who waters the malt > set on the ground, > The noble dogs keep away even the potentates. > > You are the one who soaks the malt in a jar > The waves rise, the waves fall. > Ninkasi, you are the one who soaks > the malt in a jar > The waves rise, the waves fall. > > You are the one who spreads the cooked > mash on large reed mats, > Coolness overcomes. > Ninkasi, you are the one who spreads > the cooked mash on large reed mats, > Coolness overcomes. > > You are the one who holds with both hands > the great sweet wort, > Brewing [it] with honey and wine > (You the sweet wort to the vessel) > Ninkasi, (…) > (You the sweet wort to the vessel) > > The filtering vat, which makes > a pleasant sound, > You place appropriately on [top of] > a large collector vat. > Ninkasi, the filtering vat, > which makes a pleasant sound, > You place appropriately on [top of] > a large collector vat. > > When you pour out the filtered beer > of the collector vat, > It is [like] the onrush of > Tigris and Euphrates. > Ninkasi, you are the one who pours out the > filtered beer of the collector vat, > It is [like] the onrush of > Tigris and Euphrates. A 4000-year-old Sumerian poem about BEER. You _know_ the shit be good. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-friggin-love-beer/285775.md?page=2)